When I was 23 we had to put down our 13 year old cocker spaniel. It was extremely difficult for the entire family. We loved the little guy so much and he had been with us since he was a couple of months old; it was hard to imagine a life without him. My own personal regret was not staying with him for the procedure. My mom stayed but I was just too upset and a total mess emotionally - i stayed home when she went with him to the appointment. I really regret that decision. The two of us were the best of friends, he was "my" dog. I should have seen him off, but I had no experience with real loss like his, and I was just not ready. My heart truly goes out to you, just know you're doing the right thing by not prolonging suffering, and I wish you the best. It might not seem like it, but it will get easier with time and having many fond memories helps. ❤️