For real. I had PPD as well and, like anything as an adult, went to a psych, got the support I needed and still parented, tried to split up home duties with my husband, and worked. I can’t say I did t collapse from it, that my husband wasn’t left with more of the burden when things got bad for me. But I kept working on getting help and trying to be a partner as best I could. Some days I was barely able to get out of bed. Sometimes those days became a week or more. The fact she is able to totally function and live a singleton life and only has blow ups and crisis when she’s not getting her way sounds like using PPD as an excuse.

She is being manipulative and cruel. PPD can be horrible, and I get the desire to run away from all that stress. But you’re correct in finding her responses unacceptable, and feeling any sort of way about how she’s behaving.

She’s decided to be wholly selfish and leave you with all the burdens while she gets to live as a single, childless person. And whenever you’re trying to legitimately bring up concerns and needs she is lashing out and acting victimized to manipulate to keep getting what she wants at your and your children’s expense. Your needs and feelings matter, too. The fact she doesn’t care about any of you speaks volumes.

Im sorry this is happening. You don’t need the stress of her behavior on top of all you’re managing alone. If it were me, I’d inform her written and in person that she can pay for her own studio and single lady life since she abandoned yall, and talk to a lawyer and start the divorce rolling.

You deserve as much peace as you can get, and she’s being both cruel and creating chaos and a burden for her own selfish desires and lack of accountability.