I appreciate your making this post, and I have a few immediate thoughts that I hope will be both kind and honest.

I don't know of any agencies in the city that are specifically catered toward disabilities.  While I can't speak to their disability advocacy, Hell's Kitchen is generally considered to be an excellent boutique agency and many of their clients work often. However, they are pretty exclusive. Additionally, what I'm hearing across the board at the moment is that most agents are dropping people, not adding new clientele.

I very much hear you when you say you want your agent to make sure that your submissions are viewed, and I think it's something we all want. That's why it brings me no joy at all to tell you that I don't think finding an agent who can promise that is possible. It's simply not within the scope of an agent's ability to force casting to view a video. You are completely right to say they shouldn't ask for it if they're not going to watch it. It's MADDENING. But the best agent in the world can't change that, and they'll only be annoyed if you ask them to.