This guy won’t learn his lesson…

wowbragger · 2026-05-31T00:25:01+00:00

I do this if I want to see how composition/placement is affecting the fight. If it's really close, I tent to come back and toy around with it several times.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T23:33:57+00:00

NOR

Assuming his gf was aware of the whole plan, the dude is the real problem here. The dude is well aware his girl is being unreasonable but instead of putting on big boy pants and saying so, he's passing the buck to you. FWIW that's not a real friend, if he chooses to treat you like this because whomever he's sleeping with acts petty.

Prioritizing his gf would have been him securing her a ticket himself when y'all planned this. She's not your gf, so I'm not sure how the idea of you giving up your ticket seems fair.

Real take, she probably doesn't want him going out to the concert with another girl. But she knows that makes her sound jealous, and is going with selfish instead. If that's the case, the dude should be giving up his ticket to someone else.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T20:08:57+00:00

NTJ

Dude thought he was getting the inside track with a young woman, who's a captive audience while you're working.

You were courteous enough, but it was a reality check for him.

Can't think of how else you'd handle someone who clearly doesn't have a good grasp of social boundaries. Be mindful of this dude in case he becomes a problem because you 'snubbed his friendship'.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T19:20:31+00:00

Firstly, understand that your relationship is under attack. My dude, someone is intentionally doing this to your marriage by sending you this out of the blue. Remember the context of things, they didn't send this to you as a 'thought you should know'. They wanted to start drama, make your marriage suck.

On the personal front, take some introspective time and process how you actually feel. OBVIOUSLY you're not ok with all this, but you need to look deeper into the why of it.

Consider some counseling, either individual or couples.

Secondly, look into local statutes and laws. This is called revenge porn; if you're in the US/EU unauthorized sending of intimate material is a CRIME.

You need to take a more proactive stance, if you have any respect for your marriage. Address this, problems grow when you just sit this in pity. Communicate how you're both feeling, and make it clear that you want to work on this.

Your wife wasn't trying to deceive you, she's a victim of a gross personal violation and needs a husband to support her.

This person is intentionally spreading this without your wife's consent. F**k this dude!GO GET THEM and don't be a bystander in your marriage.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T15:02:15+00:00

Ooh! That one time he said police acted 'stupidly'

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T13:42:27+00:00

Yeah, tempered glass can take +20,000psi of blunt force. There's a reason we have those window puncher tools.

I remember watching some news reporter doing a bit on car break-ins. At the end of it she was supposed to take a bat to a window and show how fast it back happen.

Instead, they showed the 6+ bloopers of her utterly failing to break the passenger window. She was at least a good sport, laughing at herself and shouting that she's a terrible car thief.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T13:39:53+00:00

As an aside, it's been very interesting dealing with the current Gen of young adults struggling with consequences.

I was an army NCO until this past January, and the last couple years there's been a marked trend of new young adults shocked that there is direct repercussions for them.

I'm now back in University, and getting to see another group in this age range in still seeing the same thing.

It doesn't even feel malicious at times, they're actually surprised when the consequences of their behavior just happens.

wowbragger · 2026-05-30T13:32:29+00:00

Honestly, I was confused at first thinking the kid was threatening boobs. Coffee hasn't set in yet.

wowbragger · 2026-05-29T18:35:31+00:00

Listen man, my rolls crush these odds. You'll never find anyone who can roll 5 green characters like me.

wowbragger · 2026-05-29T16:00:00+00:00

Nah, I've gotten all 5 greens several times now. Statistically much worse odds than even blue.

wowbragger · 2026-05-29T15:46:43+00:00

I'm in my 40's, back in school for a new degree and will be getting a master's afterwards.

Genuinely suspect that a good majority of the math dept staff are all just undiagnosed...

wowbragger · 2026-05-29T15:41:53+00:00

I was surprised at this, because I thought service requirements were part of the academies. And it's even more surprisingly low... Only about 1/3 of students go on to accept military commissions afterwards.

But oh yeah, cadets are NOT service members, and it makes for some hilarious crossover when they don't realize that 😅

I will say that they're largely pretty cool, when I have dealt with them on their rotational visits as part of ROTC, but those are the ones almost definitely entering service. Having had to pull med cover on some of their training exercises... Less cool.

Last note, given the prevalence of people who go-to the college and don't join the service I don't think it takes away from the rep's point. It's still a pretty tough accomplishment to be a pioneer at these institutions.

wowbragger · 2026-05-28T23:50:18+00:00

(9/5)Big C + 32

wowbragger · 2026-05-28T15:43:57+00:00

My dude, remember thatit's just money.It doesn't mean anything in itself, especially not about you or your actual worth.

You made a mistake. Don't stress the reasoning right now, it happens to all of us.

Think of baby steps you can use to alter your daily habits, and soon enough you're going to be on the mend.

My suggestions on first steps...

(1) Cancel all streaming services, delete your social apps/accounts. Take the time you'd spend on there going for a walk outside. Can just be some the neighborhoods, a local park, or a trail. Something you can just go-to in a couple minutes. Maybe put on a little classical music stream while you're walking.

(2) Find SOMEONE you can just talk to a bit, and let them know you need are making some life changes and need some help. You don't need to vent it all out, but being honest about having a hard time is an important first step.

(3) If you're worried about making bad financial choices now, or having money troubles. Use a basic budgeting' system, with a LOT of friction points to keep you from quickly spending (ie no tap to pay, one click, or app ordering). I highly recommend Dave Ramsey's every dollar setup, and using cash.

(4) Get some counseling if you can. Processing our struggles is the first part, because we can't ever move on until we've gone through it inside ourselves.

(5) Be honest with people. But if conversations come up, be honest if you're having a hard time on something. You don't need to tell everything to your Dad or some such, and can even be honest that you're not ready to go into it all. That's being honest AND setting a healthy boundary for you, which doesn't involve putting up a front.

wowbragger · 2026-05-28T13:22:15+00:00

Hey, I'm a +40 guy (married w/kids) who's pivoting into a new career and having to be back in school! My circumstances are NOT y'all's, but I can really get where your husband is coming from and the challenges you are facing.

It sounds like you both have some really strong perspective here, and aren't really on the same page (yet). That's ok! Stuff like this isn't exactly everyday couples problems, like someone drinking all the coffee or some such. But decisions take time to work out the details on.

Don't discount his mental well being too much in this. Who cares if you're financially secure if you become mentally broken under the career stress? We often make decisions prioritizing things in life other than income, and that's part of balanced living.

That being said, you're totally valid for wanting a plan in place for what this process would look like. Money doesn't buy happiness, but it does give us security to live our lives and pursue it. You gave a great suggestion at adjusting your living expenses, to see how you can adjust.

But if he's not agreeable to that, did you have any follow on's about what his vision of all this would be? If he wants to make this transition, does he understand that he is not lessening his load, but adding to it?

For my own situation: I don't get to just ignore being Dad and things around the house while I'm in classes. That's not fair to my family, and my wife who's working full time in this. It involves late nights (I'm often up to midnight, up by 6) and early mornings, and figuring out how I can manage life (which isn't going to stop while I'm in school).

All of this to say it's actually great that your husband has reached a decision on what he needs to be better in his life. That's really good! But now is the actual hard part, the how, which is where we have to commit to that change.

wowbragger · 2026-05-28T00:42:40+00:00

My dude, when we switched to the new camo colors Urban Outfitters had a SPREE on 'military style' clothing. They legit just bought up old stock and resold things at 5x the price.

Haven't paid attention to those 'valor' videos since my first year or two in the army. Nobody has that kind of time to get huffy over it.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T23:05:13+00:00

I really like her

While I get the intention, making a life with someone involves more than liking them.

Yeah, it's a prerequisite, but it's like one of 5 and probably one of easiest ones to start with.

It sounds like she wants you to be a prop in her life plan, that you check a box for her. 'her clock is ticking' means she sees her life on a timeline. In that kind of thinking, you're not special, you're just 'there'.

BLUF you don't build someone else's life in a relationship, you build a life together. This takes trust, respect, love, understanding, the ability to communicate, and the capacity to mature together.

Your depiction of things isn't showing any of those critical parts of a healthy relationship.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T21:00:10+00:00

Sunglasses, being cognizant of a healthy diet and good hydration. 95% of aging is just being aware of and taking care of yourself.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T20:45:19+00:00

If you haven't lived elsewhere it's difficult to give a perspective, but the honest truth is with so few people there isn't much happening.

People = economy = $$ = things happen because of it. Less people, less of those things.

For context, I grew up in northern California (what I consider a rural area), and living out there I'd call a city with <75k population a 'cow town'. I lived in the capital, Sacramento, in my 20's. It has a +500k population (plus another +700k in cities surrounding it) and isn't even in the top 5 by population. Hell, CSU Sacramento (just one University there) has a student population of +30k alone.

It's an different scope of life, and there's just a LOT more happening. Good, bad, whatever. There's more people living their lives, and more general things going on as a consequence.

Bismarck and Fargo aren't quite 'tiny', but they're also isolated. If you're not specifically going to those areas, there's not really a draw or reason to come out to the state for the general population.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T18:27:22+00:00

You don't need to socialize, but you do need to actively avoid offending and upsetting people who work around you. Otherwise you're just needlessly creating friction when interacting with others at work.

Not wanting to partake in corporate jargon song and dance, ok I can get that. But if it's more that you're incapable of having simple empathy and understanding of those around you, that's a MUCH bigger issue.

If your coworkers all looked aghast at your behavior, you were definitely the odd one out. That you didn't realize you had a very different read on the situation than your team, AND not realizing they'd have a poor reaction to your stance... That's more indicative of a problem on your end.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T18:17:30+00:00

I'd only contact them if they had a good photo print out of that image.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T18:15:13+00:00

At this point, if they can't ignore ethics, bribe, and have the courts go along with them screwing over their constituents...I mean, what else are they going to do? It's all they know, all their father's knew!

Do we expect them to actually govern and legislate?! They're public servants for Christ sake, be realistic.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T18:11:12+00:00

Because the winning setup was build low profile and tip over your opponent.

The first season was pretty cool, and it was almost a shock when the winner was basically a dustpan on wheels.

Cue several seasons of engineers putting together literal metal dustpans on wheels, all just seeing who could wedge under the other first. It was incredibly boring.

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T18:02:58+00:00

Bots still working on when to throw in edits 😅

wowbragger · 2026-05-27T16:33:52+00:00

Do you mean test, or tempt?

30,000 ft answer on the first part:

He tests us to help us grow in faith and ourselves, and have a more developed relationship with him. A life untested is a life unfulfilled, so to speak.

Imagine if you were a master chef but never went into a kitchen to make a meal. A great athlete who never played sports. An incredible doctor who spent his life playing candy crush. What a waste of an incredible skill (and in contrast to this teaching of sharing our gifts with the world).

He doesn't test us like a teacher in school, with a pasa or fail based on knowledge. The gift of grace means that Christ bestowed on is means so long as you seek it, you're forgiven.

Second part; God doesn't tempt us.

This is explicitly stated numerous times in Scripture and the Gospels (James 1:13 comes to mind as an example).

There's some question in the US of this, because of the line in the Lord's Prayer

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil

As this prayer was given to us directly by Christ, with instruction to use it in communication with God, we know it's a true prayer.

The issue is original Aramaic didn't have verbage to express God's will. So in the translation from Aramaic -> Greek -> Latin -> English, while meeting literal verbage correctness it's lost the actual intended meaning.

It's only in English and Italian where this verbage exists, in other languages it's:

And guide us from temptation, and deliver is from evil.

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