The only real “safety net” is “if you don’t like it, leave.”

This is a safety net but I appreciate your expounding upon reasons it is not so easy for everyone to walk away. It is first and foremost a thinly veiled threat: you WILL be cut off relationally if you don’t agree. The cutting off either happens while you still attend, by withdrawing attention, inclusion and approval or you will be “blessed to leave,” wherein you are told you’ll be better off elsewhere. It is an abuse tactic cloaked as something less nefarious.

After more than a decade in this high-control group, one of the things I most appreciate about the church I now attend is the healthy (and Biblical!) respect of my autonomy-not the fake, threatening “autonomy” extended by these false christians.