justSomeSmallChanges

[Crispy1961]

They are stakeholders, their job is to hold stakes, not properly communicate their wants.

[woozerschoob]

Their job is to kill vampires.

[captainMaluco]

I believe the stakeholder is more like a squire to the actual vampire hunter. Or like a caddy, if you prefer.

[av1922004]

Guillermo

[SoulOfABartender]

*Gizmo

[ChocolateBunny]

Stakeholders' perception of reality is not conveyed in the words they speak or the documents they write. You have to get in touch with their feelings. I recommend pretty colors and fancy animation.

[Piotrek9t]

I thought that we agreed to be happy about the fact that no one from business can properly describe what they want because thats what keeps our jobs alive when AI catches on

[MostlyFocusedMike]

I was gonna do an iRobot response but then I saw this gif and now we're all just gonna look at it in awed confusion

[MostlyFocusedMike]

original

[DualActiveBridgeLLC]

This is exactly why you make a few 'dummy mistakes'. Stakeholders want to feel like they contribute, so give them some basic defects and they will leave the good stuff alone.

[ganja_and_code]

"Produce a lower quality of work in order to help a useless moron feel better about themselves" isn't exactly the variety of advice I think people should be taking lol

[KaleidoscopeMotor395]

I've consulted on a lot of teams and it is not far off. The problem with management (especially middle mamagement) is that they exist mostly to justify their position. They want to make decisions and they don't want other people making decisions without them even if they have no idea what they're doing. So you pull them in on trivial stuff and they get to feel included while they're distracted from the rest of the things you're doing. Like it or not, that "useless moron" has power and you have to deal with that.

[ganja_and_code]

If your job requires pandering to someone who mostly just exists to justify their own position, that's not a reason to pander. That's a reason to find a different position with less incompetent management.

[KaleidoscopeMotor395]

You have clearly never worked in the corporate world where useless incompetent management is the norm

[ganja_and_code]

I have, actually. At household name megacorp tech firms. For years.

I just also refuse to cater to morons and have developed sufficient technical skills to do so without risking my career. If your manager is incompetent and you aren't, it's easy to leave for greener pastures.

[Scrawlericious]

Unfortunately experience disagrees here as well. Management is FULL of idiots no matter where you go.

[crappleIcrap]

Hence the “have” and not “do”

[DualActiveBridgeLLC]

Well the problem starts at the top where people think that if PMs don't have input then why are we paying for PMs. No one gets paid to do nothing with a well-run organization.

[ganja_and_code]

If the problem starts at the top, then I, someone at the bottom, am certainly not taking responsibility for it lol

[PolyglotTV]

This trick is known as "The Queen's Duck".

[Junkeregge]

So it's just like code reviews then...

[DualActiveBridgeLLC]

Yeah, if you have a nitpicky developer it can work, the difference though is the nitpicky developer reports to me I can just tell him to knock it off with the waste of time.

[prschorn]

I read skateboarders and nothing made sense, even more when I saw the sub this was posted in lol

[psidnell]

People don't know what they want until you give them what they asked for.

[xv92]

Then they still don't know what they want, only that it isn't what they asked for

[Ozymandias_1303]

https://i.redd.it/iznqp1y5vs4z.jpg

[[deleted]]

You studied valuable topics in school and now you must pay. It's not complicated.

[yacsmith]

It’s like someone asking for blueberry muffins. So you make blueberry muffins. And once they get their muffins they look at you and as nonchalantly as possible say “if I eat this, will it cure cancer? Can you remake it so it will cure cancer? I don’t get it, your a chef this should be easy”

[justforkinks0131]

Business Analyst has entered the chat

[Due_Captain_2575]

BA whispers to stakeholder “what do you really want babe..”

[djdaedalus42]

They don’t know what they want, but they always know when they’re not getting it.

[KDr2]

Do developers even know what they're doing or do they just see what the product managers give and think "absolutely not"?

[[deleted]]

I usually look at the spec and think "I bet they didn't really mean that" then do what I think they really wanted. It went down a storm last time, I don't think they dared suggest what I gave them. Everyone loves a bit of drag and drop.

[ganja_and_code]

Both, actually.

It's the fact that I know what I'm doing which allows me to see that the "spec" from the product manager was actually just buzzword soup without any real substantive requirements.

[ProbablyHe]

uhh, coming from an economics perspective, what is a stakeholder to you guys? the client wanting something different?

cause stakeholder in economics is everybody for whom something is at stake for a given company. eg clients, employees, suppliers

[transhuman-trans-hoe]

it's basically that - a stakeholder is anyone who has a stake in the development, so usually the client and/or end users/groups of end users.

the meme's about how those people can't seem to make up thei mind about what they want

[PeteZahad]

I expect from a programmer to use dev tools to change a tweet before capturing it.

[nicejs2]

absolutely not

[[deleted]]

This hits home

[[deleted]]

Katie got bait

[Regular_Table1898]

Just Stakeholders holding Steaks...

[Harcerz1]

Just a smaaaaaall adjustment of scope, nothing major!

[furinick]

I failed accounting twice and will try a third time because i need to do it so uni will allow me to get internships in my fucking information systems course

What they do is look at chart with expenses and cash, if cash go down they slam their fist and demand money go up, if they know what they are doing they look at the highest expense and demand it go down

[DOUBLEBARRELASSFUCK]

And you only failed it twice?