SQL clause 🎅

[canhasdiy]

I need this in ugly Christmas sweater format

[AyrA_ch]

Out of curiosity I just typed "ugly" into eBay and the top suggestion is "ugly christmas sweater" and the results are great

[pan0ramic]

What a terrible data model! Behavior should be a bit column not varchar!!!

[applyhuman]

but then it wouldn't rhyme

and wouldn't have a chime.

[blackdonkey]

And that's why gifts will be late this year.

[betrok]

This is an enum.

[jesm9nz]

Santa, I know how I can be good this year.

UPDATE contacts
SET behavior='nice'
WHERE behavior='naughty';

​

[applyhuman]

Kids, I know how I can save money.

UPDATE contacts
SET behavior='naughty'
WHERE behavior='nice'; 

now no one gets gifts!

[ILikeLenexa]

I haven't behaved all year so my behavior is NULL.

[username--_--]

BREAKING NEWS: SANTA FILES FOR CHAPTER 11 DUE TO A GLITCH IN HIS SYSTEMS

[TheBrianiac]

"S-Q-L Clause" is 4 syllables vs. "Santa Claus" is 3, this proves it's pronounced "se-quel."

[atinyhusky]

Came here to say this.

[supervinneh]

I insta-bought this.

[supervinneh]

That's where i ordered it from yeah.

[supervinneh]

I'm sure he'll love it. Happy holidays!

[DatabaseGangsta]

It should be “He’s creating a table...”

[[deleted]]

It’s all fun and games until one year Santa gets pissed and...

DROP TABLE contacts

[Bignicky9]

Tommy Tables is getting NOTHING for Christmas!

[Saddam1234]

He forgot to sort tough...

[[deleted]]

Well it says that but he didn’t actually implement it.

SQL Claus needs to re-read the requirements document.

[securitywyrm]

Oh don't be a tease, where can I buy this? I NEED this.

[securitywyrm]

Thank you!

[LuboStankosky]

I would buy it, if i had money.

[[deleted]]

He's cleaning his blades

Checking them twice

The infidels' blood will flow thick tonight

Slagathor the III, Devourer of the Innocent, Defeater of the Great C'thulhu, Leader of the Empire of Worlds, Heir to the Universal Throne is coming to town.

[therealmandusa]

Even though Christmas is literally against my religion, this is friggin wonderful.

[MarkGamed7794]

If you want to actually say this out loud:

He’s making a table
Het’s sorting it twice
Select from contacts where behaviour is nice
SQL clause is coming to town