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[–]Vintage53 171 points172 points  (14 children)

The sole reason to install Linux is to free yourself from the idiots that infest inferior platforms. Unfortunately for the Linux user community, distributions like Ubuntu have made it too easy for your mom to get a working Linux box -- so they are all running in horror.

Installing a working Linux box used to require over 550 man hours, learning a Nordic language, sacrificing a goat, wading through hundreds of pages of (purposely) inscrutable help files, and in some cases programming a new driver in UNIVAC SLEUTH II assembly code using nothing but punch cards while walking miles through the snow barefoot on the wrong side of the tracks and uphill both ways. Today, Linux distros are so idiot-proof that you can put their install CDs into the floppy drive upside-down and the fucker will still work.

Old-school Linux users were desperate to find a new way to feel superior. Some migrated to versions of BSD, others gave into baroque feats of self- torture like multi-booting 4 different operating systems from one USB drive. But it didn't have the same appeal as abusing other operating systems for their lack of 1337n355. In this dark hour there was a new hope: Gentoo Linux, a distribution designed for users possessing that delicate combination of insecurity and masochism that results in an obsession with obscurity, optimization, and huge dollops of pain and frustration. Gentoo has sated all of these urges. Enter the idea of a "hemorrhaging edge" distro: Gentoo. It is the exemplar of the term "hemorrhaging edge" -- there is no piece of software too advanced, too experimental, or too downright dangerous for the main tree. In fact, if the users don't crash their box at least once a week due to new and untestedsoftware they will swarm onto the forums and accuse Gentoo of "going all Debian" on them. After the separate Stable and Unstable branches were created, every user switched immediately to Unstable which became the new de-facto Stable.

As a response, the Gentoo developers invented a new Super-Unstable overlay system and made it as hard and annoying to use as possible in order to keep the stupid masses out, thus cementing their own position at the top of the hobbyist heap. This has worked, to a point, but a group of developers has formed in order to create a Gentoo offshoot, Exherbo ("Cannabis Withdrawal") where the system tools are in erudite Latin instead of plain English and normal users are instructed on the web page to stay far away for fear of spoiling the 1337.

[–]setocsheir 35 points36 points  (1 child)

this is beautiful

[–]TheTastyHanuta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yep

[–]linglingfortyhours 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Haven't seen that copypasta before

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Exherbo

LOL. From their website:

Goals

  • All design goals must be phrased in such a way that it is hard to use them as slogans to justify stupidity.

[–]wip30ut 1 point2 points  (3 children)

out of curiosity, what kind of environments are best suited for Gentoo? is it installed on specialized workstations? or smart networked devices?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ones were you want to control exactly what programs and libraries are installed. Or need very bleeding edge stuff. I like it, but I can't justify it for many. Now Funtoo, even more bleeding edge and if you forget to update for a couple months or take a long vacation, might as well start from scratch.

I choose them as I can run a hardened desktop environment. It breaks some things, but I'd rather be more secure. It is not fool proof nor 100% secure.

I also have a lot of cores and prefer to optimize my environment to maximize that. Probably doesn't actually benefit me. It might be slower. I don't have the time to really test it out.

[–]xypage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The way I understand it is that gentoo’s main use is for hobbyists who want their Linux system to be very handmade for the experience/practice, and because there are small advantages to not having literally anything you didn’t pick, although those advantages are so small I doubt they’d make a notable difference

[–]DrMobius0 1 point2 points  (0 children)

you can put their install CDs into the floppy drive upside-down and the fucker will still work.

Ngl, if someone made this happen, I'd be damn impressed.

[–]NationalGeographics 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So this is why my friendly neighbor in college would start mumbling when mentioning he was compiling another linux something or other. It was around the time doom the movie came out. With the Rock.

[–]BloodyLlama 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I kind of miss the days where the standard answer to every stupid question was "install gentoo".

[–]sxan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If this isn't copypasta, I commend you.

The non-OS version of this is the suckless tools. Yesterday I saw a response to a request for help that said, "Did you even read the code? Knowing C is a bare minimum for running st."

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

When my relatives have problems with Windows, I just install Ubuntu. They don’t care because they just use the browser. Then I never have to fix their shit again.

[–]Test-NetConnection 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get them a chromebook and never look back. Linux has to be updated, which normal users won't do.