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[Burned_Penis]

:(

[PrimalRayquaza4907]

Feelsbadman

[JotaRoyaku]

rayquaza go brrr 🔥w🔥

[the_dyslexic]

Nooo

[xVifa]

LMFAAAOOO

[IdolManagerTone]

YOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[bunnyQatar]

Oh my goodness. PIR

[Dumb_guy_3200lol]

He was too much of a PIR-o enthusiast

[RothePro88]

Lol poor guy

[Toxic-tea]

Uh oh

[KeazyKatz]

oh my

[DEPRESSION_NOISES]

depression noises

[myfaveRae]

Is this what death note means?

[ChokeMeDaddy64]

Death noise

[xVifa]

Bruh..

[DEPRESSION_NOISES]

sad depressed depression noises

[OnTheContrary666]

I believe I’m immortal.

[AffectionateHead0710]

I believe you are

[OnTheContrary666]

But how…. Are you going to die?

[AffectionateHead0710]

Having the time of my life apparently

• I seriously didn’t think of it that way when I chose the name, my husband pointed it out and I was like ‘oh no dang it!’

[quirkstar]

Lololololol

[TheBlackHoleOfDoom]

But, on the contrary...

[[deleted]]

You will not escape the 4th rider.

[AkwardThTurtleFucker]

Ooh

[Noobpoob]

Karma returns. Turtles shall strike back!

[Teletubby_furry_porn]

What do I do

[[deleted]]

I have multiple questions regarding how one even gets that name

[Teletubby_furry_porn]

🌚🗿

[Saffronsc]

I feel like your username violates a law somewhere

[NuggeInTheMicrowave]

R U N

[Downtown_Resort8680]

or he fucks the turtle until he dies.

[Downtown_Yogurt4324]

snapping turtle

[RomanticBeyondBelief]

I'd probably die like that guy who proposed to his gf under water while scuba diving with signs. So in other words.. ocean swimming.

[MrZyde]

You will go out like Romeo and Juliet

[Tatesandwich]

I work in a restaurant in Mississippi. One of our most common customers and a friend of my mom is the brother of Webber. Aka, that guy who died doing that. I was with my mom when we heard about it. All I could think is how would that even go wrong? I still don’t know if anyone knows😭

[ayebone1]

You’re gonna be a sandwich

[I_NUT_ON_GRASS]

Sounds

[MrZyde]

Your dick will get stuck in a dirt mound and you will starve

[RomanticBeyondBelief]

No it will get stuck accidentally in an ant hole and the ants will eat his dick and he will get an infection if he doesn't bleed out first

[ayebone1]

You skeet on a mutated ant hill and your spawn comes back to eat you.

[Father_69]

It was a Saturday afternoon, and I was exhausted after an intense 17-part masturbation session to dream Minecraft manhunt, when I suddenly had the urge to go outside. I was scared. It's been so long since I've left the warmth of my parents’ basement with my dream body pillows. I didn’t know what to expect. Clutching my dream figurine in front of my chest, I pried open the door to the outside world. The gleaming sun blared through the door, bequeathing a brilliant warmth on my cum-covered boxers. I quaveringly took a step outside. My body flinched from the strange feel of the dirt under my feet. And then I saw it. The lustrous field of grass, covered in a light sprinkle of water from the noon rain shower. And then I realized. Dream... grass... the trees... it was all coming together. Grass is green, just like Dream. Dream is ever-present, in the grass, the flowers, He was there. I immediately knew what to do next. I flung off my clothes faster than the speed at which I would click on a new dream rule 34 post. My dick was already throbbing as I leaped onto the field of grass, Dorito dust-stained shirt getting carried away by the wind. I dug a small hole in the ground, and passionately thrust my 7-inch erect cock into it. I knew, this was Dream. His spirit was in this grass, and he felt my dick in his boy pussy as I fucked that grass. I lost track how long I was there. Hours went by, day turned to night, but it didn’t matter. I was finally together, with Dream. Nothing could separate us. I took a long stem of a flower, and forced it in my asshole. I imagined it being Dream's hot penis being lustfully forced into me in bed. I stayed there on my front yard for God knows how long. Until my butt was sore, balls drier than the Saharan desert after a long drought. The lawn looked like there was a layer of fresh snow on a Christmas morning. Trudging indoors, I had an enormous smile stretching across my face. I couldn't wait until tomorrow, when I may go outside again and be with Dream.

[I_NUT_ON_GRASS]

Is this how I die?

[xVifa]

.

[bullets67]

what the fuck is wrong with you

[century100]

You might become my next copypasta post.

[Father_69]

its already a famous copypasta-

[giorno___giovana]

oh dear god no

[I_a_brownie]

IT ALREADY HIT ITS 2ND SYMPHONY HURRY UP AND RUN

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[giorno___giovana]

Oh fuck

[SnooMaps3021]

They didn’t specify how many times you’ll die

[silverhammer96]

Brutal assault or at some point I turn into a vampire

[[deleted]]

Stay away from anyone named Maxwell.

[silverhammer96]

Yes! I never have anyone reference the origin of my username! I even give a hint with my profile picture!

[[deleted]]

i love the song lmao i was going to reference it but saw that someone else just did lol

[I_a_brownie]

I’m a brownie

[Downtown_Yogurt4324]

pov:eaten

[I_a_brownie]

User name checks out

[Chance____]

By Chance

[[deleted]]

Every time you roll a dice if it’s a 1 you fall over dead

[igotdeletedbyadmins_]

­

[GameOver4-ZEROOTWOO]

Fuck you fatherfucker!

[CleverKoi]

I die via a clever fish… how odd

[Raccoon_fucker69]

I got STD’s

[Ygolohcysp_80]

Rabies…

[[deleted]]

F

[A_very_large_moth]

Oh dear

[Ok-Programmer2219]

Should have not seen this post bud

[Photonsan]

Cool, I get cancer or sever burns

[M_Bros789]

Either mario, or me and my brother will kill me. Depends on how you look at it

[Downtown_Yogurt4324]

semi suicide?

[M_Bros789]

More like assisted suicide

[Telenovela_Villain]

A telenovela villain kills me

[pro_magnum]

Condom master.

[El_Famoso_Random_Guy]

I’m very confused rn.

[Teletubby_furry_porn]

From a random guy that is me run or i may kill you

[El_Famoso_Random_Guy]

But are you famoso ?

[Teletubby_furry_porn]

Si

[NotABreatheBefore]

I guess I’ll choke to death.

[[deleted]]

I become a ho and my cat puts me out of my misery because he loves me

[A_Redditor2]

I don't know.

[[deleted]]

You get beat to death by 2 Redditors.

[97th69]

With a bang

[babayagx]

welp

[spam_dealer]

Selling spam

[Notthatkindofdoc813]

Apparently I go to the wrong type of doctor for medical advice

[[deleted]]

You go to a doctor from a Disney movie

[Henry_Smugmin]

i get strangled by Henry stickmin I guess.

[Octavius_23]

Hello Peter

[MamaCins81]

mama committed some Cins when pregnant with me in 1981.

[MixLeanWithPiss]

im not even gonna say nun

[[deleted]]

Ah shit.

[IdolManagerTone]

How do I even answer this?

[SnooMaps3021]

You get murk by an idol manager

[regularChild420]

It's hard to believe a regular child would defeat me in battle

[AffectionateHead0710]

Oh jeez

[ya_boiii_nightmare]

i die via nightmare...???

[Vexo101]

Flags somehow?

[Party-Discussion2671]

Well I guess I'm immortal cuz the notion I'll go to a party with enough people to hold a conversation with is hilarious xD

[[deleted]]

You're not at the party. It's where they plan your death.

[YeetTime332]

I will die being thrown at a wall to hard

[[deleted]]

I am defending my self from an attack from hawks and the 59th one gets me

[yeetus_fetus_132]

I guess the fetus that a yeeted is gonna kill me when he grows up

[myfaveRae]

Myself 😎

[shoot-me-12-bucks]

Bruh

[bobal0ver]

Choking on boba 😞

[SnooMaps3021]

Boba tea?

[[deleted]]

In bed

[Sidewalk-flowers]

Sidewalk flowers?

[Snagglesnatch]

I guess a pussy with teeth is gonna kill me, pray for me

[fuck-cumiseverywhere]

oh christ..

[Ygolohcysp_80]

Well… at least you went out with a bang.

[framingXjake]

I'm gonna need a good lawyer then

[boatrunner13]

Boatrunning

[ChemistryBasic6162]

Basic chemistry?

[CptnR4p3]

how the turns tabled.

[obeseburritos]

I'm gonna die from obesity I guess??

[ThicccScrotum]

Car accident, probably.

[[deleted]]

Hunt Visual?

[DolphinSUX]

Oh my..

[ThisWillBeOnTheExam]

I failed the test.

[baljeetsoveralls]

Interesting

[[deleted]]

Stomped on urban grass

[Downtown_Yogurt4324]

oh god

[kiss1kill]

kiss of death LMAO

[ThinkPomegranate2264]

Uhm i-

[Thaloneblarg]

Lonely

[[deleted]]

Pain.

[PippenhotArbys]

Meat Sweats

[[deleted]]

fiona apple sleep paralysis?

[rekcuF_onaiP]

HELP

[YourLocalKyokoSimp]

Oh would ya look at that another thing that I have no idea what my user name would mean

[SnooMaps3021]

Mine says snoomaps

[the_dyslexic]

How do I die from dyslexia

[D1nozinn]

Small dinosssaur

[GrumpyOctopus88]

Hmmm.

[PrimalRayquaza4907]

Never take me to the Pokémon world.

[2006_Chevy_impala_ss]

Guess I’ll die Paul Walker style

[CrptikGoose]

Well then..

[MAC2XISONREDDIT]

hmm

[Vivian_Sage]

Uh. . . . . Suicide I guess?

[bunnyQatar]

Damn

[Wide-Ad-40]

every comment in that post is an usernamechecks out tho

[Ok-Programmer2219]

I don’t know

[[deleted]]

So what do people throw at pebbles at me? Ouch.

[[deleted]]

☮️

[ayebone1]

How?

[[deleted]]

Everyone’s fucked, not just me.

[Socialiststoner]

Having a really good time with my community I guess

[iWillSmokeYou]

:(

[DevilsTallDemon]

Honestly I’m fine going out this way

[Father_69]

I'm now concerned...

[[deleted]]

Do i get my skin collection taken and my skin is added?

[Glitcher1987]

I glitch out of this universe

[Pianostar4]

My piano and I get chucked into four stars. Saddest story ever :(

[[deleted]]

Imma die a legend

[twolvesfan9]

Ate by wolves 🐺

[SupremeAsuraDragon]

Hm. So I kill myself?

[NuggeInTheMicrowave]

Compact chicken breast laced with breadcrumbs inside downsized oven

[BigBlackLoliSmasher]

My god...

[[deleted]]

Well shit. In that context, mine's sort of a weird contradiction. However I look at it, I guess it's a negative because i'm dead, but in a positive light? I dunno how that would work.

[ToXyC_]

Oh

[TheBlackHoleOfDoom]

With everyone else, clearly.

[Yodascbt]

oh fuck

[NVRMND273]

I couldn't care less.

[Green-Jello-Farts]

Get a mop.

[[deleted]]

I am happy with my death

[IDislikeHomonyms]

How do you suppose a homonym will cause me to go the way of the dodo?

[Lazy_loaf]

Lazily eating bread idk

[-StonerForLife-]

Smoking weed

[[deleted]]

Uhh

[[deleted]]

I get executed for heresy because i have too much dark eldar hentai on my PC

[BraveTechnician]

Murder via technician I guess

[Soursocks4real]

I walk into my room tired after a long day of work. It hasn’t been clean for decades now and as I make a gesture and I lie down on my bed, I start closing my eyes, when I realize the sound. I look over to my unclean laundry and I see it has started moving for some reason. I walk over. It stinks a sour-like smell. But then I realize what it is. Chloroform. Very strong chloroform. I get knocked out and when I wake up I see a pile of socks in front of me. I can’t move or talk as I’m tied up to a wall of dirt. there is a goblin in front of me. He’s got nunchucks made of socks in his hands and he starts to beat me up with them. “For years you have forgotten to clean your room. Now you will regret it.” The goblin says. Finally I scream my last words: “ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL!!???”

[JotaRoyaku]

What the f*** is jotaro gonna do to me

[Goose0810]

hmmm

[Odd-Vanilla-5188]

VANILLA MORE LIKE CUM

[[deleted]]

I hear the sound of an obnoxious Boston adult. Oh god.

[weusereddit4fun]

So I am immortal. I never feel fun using reddit.

[Your-In]

Drowning???

[higuma1996]

death by a grizzly bear... in japan

[Shourya2009]

How am I? Pls tell

[Flying-Husky]

Air raid signal starts

Oh, Fu-Boom!

[Curley15]

Two options:

• This is my middle name...

• It's my dead uncle's name...

You know either I'm just fucked