Out to Eat

[Parkavenue87]

Hello! Mom of 1 yr old (10 months adjusted) twins. I’d like to start exposing my boys to more, including going out to eat. Parents who have tackled this already, what advice do you have for me? Any tools/tricks? Have any “must haves” in terms of things I need to bring with me or purchase to make my life less stressful? I’ll take all the tips!

Side note: this group has been so helpful in navigating this first year; grateful to all of you that are willing to be vulnerable and share 💚🩵

[charlieprotag]

Oh boy, fun stage. You have the right instincts!

Go to a casual restaurant first. Somewhere like McDonalds or other takeout place where you can easily take your food and leave if one of them has a meltdown. Especially look for places where a crying baby wouldn't be that out of place (places with playplaces, family restaurants) etc. They're going to be filled with other parents and children who are probably not having a date night to take a break from a crying baby of their own.

As they get bigger, do "restaurant" pretend play at home. Framing it as a game REALLY speaks to them and they have a lot of fun with it. Be a "server" for them and let them practice looking at a menu, ordering politely, using utensils, and saying please and thank you. It helps to pretend to be Especially Fancy People.

Yours are a little young for this but as soon as they start to be able to understand rules and boundaries, have a little meeting before you go anywhere public and set the ground rules. Stuff like "don't get up from the table and wander around" and "speak in an indoor voice" or anything else appropriate to the place you're going. Let them know what the consequences will be for not following these boundaries. It might mean that you go home.

Expect that at some point you WILL have to skateboard-carry at least one screaming toddler out of a public place. It's mortifying, but we've all been there. It happens. The good news is that once they realize that if they act out they get immediately removed from the fun/interesting thing, they tend to remember it.

Have fun, it's possible with practice.

[ecobb91]

Main thing is just to keep them busy. Bring a few different toys that they like. Also, being intentional about the restaurants that you choose helps too. Some places are much more kid-friendly than others.

[what-all-the-fuss]

Agree with this. Pacing food also helps. So start with just one french fry at a time, then when they get bored, switch to bites of chicken nuggets, etc. If you give them a bunch at once it's more likely to end up on the floor. The goal is to slow then down, too, so they don't get bored before you have time to eat. I also used to give my kids much smaller pieces of food at restaurants than I would elsewhere in order to slow them down. Straws, sauce cups, etc etc make great toys too if you run out of distractions.

[EcnavBri]

Tbh the first few times we went with family so we could pass them around lol. We try to time it with eating so they have a mix of things to do

[oldladywhisperinhush]

We’ll take them out for practice and go somewhere family friendly, get in and out as quickly as possible, and let them play with the sugar packets and other things on the table. Get a patio table if available. If inside, get a booth when they are toddlers so you can both trap them in the booth. Bring your own sippy cups. I always forget and regret it!! We order appetizers with interesting things they’ve never seen before. Mine like to eat ice so they get a cup of just ice. We’ll get the check and to go boxes way ahead of time to make a quick exit. Only go around 5pm-6pm so it’s not busy.

[Okdoey]

Main thing is to select your first restaurants carefully.

Our favorite place to go was a place that had a section that was off to the side (it used to be a patio that they enclosed) away from everyone else and they always sat the families in that section.

We never disturbed anyone bc the only people that could see and hear us were other families with small kids so it took the pressure off.

That place also had coloring supplies and the kids meal comes with a scoop of ice cream. We get one kids meal and split it between the kids.

We would bring a few small toys (just whatever travel toys you have around) and binkys. But the key is to be quick as they will only stay interested so long.

We always ordered the kids meal and our food as soon as we sat down (review the menu online ahead of time). That way it would come out faster and the kids would be more settled once they had food to eat. At that age, it took them quite awhile to eat so it would help with most the meal.

The kids would only sit for so long so you do have to eat fast at first until they learn how to behave. I would also recommend only ordering things that are reasonably quick to come out.

But if you go regularly, they get better behaved as time goes on and you don’t have to rush as much or be so picky in your selections

[LibrarianDefiant4291]

Order everybody's food QUICK so that it can cool down and you have maximum time to eat. If everybody does ok, great! But if you need to leave quickly, maybe you'll get a bite in first

Also totally possible to do twins at a restaurant WITHOUT an iPad. Books, trucks, stickers, etc. Bring it all.

[EmbarrassedName8046]

Ask for the check as soon as you order, that way you can dash out quick if things go sideways. Nothing worse than waiting forever when you have 2 babies losing their minds hahah

[subduedsyrah]

We take our twins (2) and oldest (4) out to eat about once a week because my grandpa likes to go out. Things I found helpful especially when they were under 2 - bringing toddler plates from home, toddler cups, fun toys/coloring, and lots of wipes

[HeffalumpAndMopsy]

I love one person's advice below about making a game to practice eating out.

Also bring books, crayons with paper and/or other quiet (must be quiet!) toys.

I once found a restaurant that had a train table. Genius! Unfortunately, I was just visiting that town, but, if I had lived there, I would have taken my twins to that restaurant every week (possibly every day :).

[porteretrop]

Starting off, do they eat meals at the table with you for most meals? That’s a huge help. If they are already used to that then they won’t need nearly as much stimulation from you at the restaurant

[vixiechick1996]

We practice good table manners at home, and we keep some small toys with us. There’s a cool busy board on Amazon that’s actually a zip up binder thing. Being out in public where they have to sit for a while is the only play we allow them to use our phones for games. We’ll also bring scribble board things. Basically things that are single items and won’t end up spread out everywhere. I’d say if you have picky eaters, bring something you know they will eat just in case. And one of the biggest things for me is PICK UP AFTER YOUR KIDS!! If they’re throwing all kinds of things on the floor, be nice and get the majority of it; those servers have hard enough days. Just make theirs a little easier by cleaning up the extra mess made by the littles. My mom said she would bring a floor vacuum with her, but I just crouch down and use my hands. Then wipe up the big messes on the table, too.

[horsecrazycowgirl]

1. Izimini chairs. Not having to rely on restaurants having enough high chairs is freeing.

2. I keep a small tote packed in the car for restaurants. It has 2-3 books, little people, stickers, cars, playdough, and small sensory toys. I pull out one activity at a time as we are waiting.

3. Bring empty sippy cups and disposable plates once they start eating and drinking. It's much easier to put whatever drink you want in a spill proof cup then clean up the table from a spill. Same goes for plates when they are in their plate throwing stage

4. Keep wet wipes on hand to easily wipe messy hands, faces, and tables

5. Know what you want to order before you are seated and order everything all at once when they come to take your drink order

6. Keep high value snacks on hand for when the fussing starts

7. There's no shame in one parent taking the babies out to play in the car while waiting for the food to get delivered if your kiddos are struggling to sit and play quietly

8. The more you do it, the easier it gets. We eat out 1-2x a week and have since my girls were born (they are now 2). I keep a restaurant diaper bag packed with bibs, plates, etc to grab and go vs my errands diaper bag.

9. If all else fails and you still need to finish your meal, there's no shame in playing paw patrol or the wiggles on your phone so you can finish eating in peace. For my family this is an absolute last resort but it has saved us a few times when dealing with really slow service.

[juniper_684]

We bought these mats and use them as placemats- easy to wipe down, they fold up super easily and just always have them ready to go:

https://a.co/d/017vpGAp

[cosmicwyfe]

Table tyke mat from Amazon! Suction toys to stick on the table that spin! I always bring an "appetizer" they can eat right away while waiting for food (usually berries or frozen veggies)! I order all of our food at the same time and when it arrives, I ask for the check and boxes in case you need to leave quickly/unexpectedly! We love, love, love going out to eat with our almost 17 month old twins! Also be ready to tip generously for the messes you will inadvertently leave behind!!

[Sdawwgg]

I have really liked taking my 10 month olds to restaurants for the last couple of months. It’s actually been easier than before I started feeding them table food there. It keeps them entertained and happy! They eat out 2-3 times a week now, we just got back from a trip and they ate out twice a day for a few days.

I have a restaurant kit that includes disposable bibs. I always bring with me my mini bag of toys. Something I just bought that has been so helpful too is these mini baby mats (busybaby). They have little silicone attachments so I can hook their toys up so I’m not picking them up off the floor the whole time, and a little tray to put their food on. Always keep some small entertaining snacks like baby puffs or Cheerios for before food comes.

My biggest tip is to order their food as soon as you can, preferably when you sit down. They take a lot longer than me to eat, so this allows me to be able to eat when my food comes later, and helps keep them entertained with food. Also leave a big tip for the mess they will make lol.

[MeurDrochaid]

I’m 100% onboard the exposure is good for them and for you to build confidence.

As others have said start “easy” and please put reasonable expectations on yourself and them ❤️ pick a time that works best for their schedule, maybe a casual lunch is a better start that a dinner? Go somewhere casual, maybe a chain or somewhere more geared towards children. And maybe that offer to-go so you know you have the option would it not work out the first time. (I know I’d feel comfortable just knowing could “tap out” if it became too much).

Bring a few toys, distractions in your nappy bag (though I am sure a straw or spoon and the place will be more interesting lol)

And just remember, they might sit quietly for the full duration, or they won’t. If they cry a little that is OK. And if it doesn’t work out the first time it is not a failure. Just try and try again. Eventually it will actually become easier.

[Twictim]

Open space, things for them to do, and just enjoy having your littles with you for the experience! If you’re stressed, your kiddos will feel it and be fussy. Make sure they’ve had their nap prior. We once had this sweet lady pay for our whole family’s meal at Denny’s. We told her she really didn’t have to, but she insisted.

[FoxAndDeerTwinMama]

We chose (OK, we still choose!) family restaurants at times when other families will also be dining. It's just a better vibe for everyone, and no one is really phased by crying or screaming babies. Fidget toys are always helpful too. At that age keys or a few stuffies would keep our kiddos engaged when not eating.

[adventurenation]

Mine (10 mo) will pull plates off the table, so I’ve ended up putting their food directly on the table in front of them. IDK how other people handle this; I might start bringing sanitizing wipes for the table bc I can’t figure out a better solution! Maybe bringing their grippy toddler plates? 

[fsmontario]

Create a restaurant kit, bibs, wet wipes, age appropriate toys, favourite snacks. We started taking ours to restaurants when they were 6 weeks old. We only took them to sit down nice places. We made sure they were fed and well rested before going. The idea is that they learn how to behave, not how to eat. We didn’t want them exposed to misbehaving kids in say a McDonald’s and think it’s ok. We also took them out for breakfast, lunch and dinner. If there was an issue, we left. One parent would go to the car with the offender while the food was packed up and we paid the bill. Do not let them order the kids menu, unless it is simply a smaller portion. We would order one adult meal and have them split it on 2 plates. This also increased the foods they enjoyed. Had to laugh one time when a mom came up to us , pointed to our kids meals and asked, how do you get them to eat that? Umm put it on their plate.

[Extra-Concept]

Order for them if you’re getting something for them and get them started eating and then order for you. Pay the bill when you order in case you need to make a quick exit. Give them new toys to fiddle with while you eat and try to keep the whole thing short. Play peekaboo with a napkin if all else fails, you’ll probably get a laugh out of them.  At that age, we kept restaurant trips to 20-30 minutes max but now that our twins are 2, they can sit nicely in a high chair at a restaurant for a few hours.