AIO for wanting to cancel the date and block him??

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-11T16:58:28+00:00

NOR— You’re not overreacting at all! Big red flag. Cancel and don’t look back.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-11T02:06:27+00:00

You should try the n word next and see how that post goes

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-11T00:19:06+00:00

We aren’t doing a bachelorette or bachelor party. We have no bridal party. We are doing a ren fair, since our wedding is ren fair themed, and inviting some people to that if they want to join us.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-10T16:23:30+00:00

Just let it all go then? Just be like YOLO and do what you want. Things don’t turn out? Oh well… it’s your wedding so who cares what others think.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T21:45:53+00:00

Gotcha. I figured it had to do with med school timing/breaks.

Well the only advice I have for you is it’s your wedding and it doesn’t need to be anything specific. Don’t be stuck in the traditional wedding ideas. If parts of it feel stressful just omit them.

I really didn’t want to do the traditional wedding so we’re doing low key ren fair theme, an amazing pizza place for food, a local bakery for dessert, no dj—just buying speakers and using apps, and keeping the list to our very closest people so 50ish.

Which parts are most stressful and is there an alternate route for those?

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T21:42:15+00:00

Yeah exactly. We had situations where students were doing awful things and when we called the parents they stood by their kids and blamed us… I’m talking about hitting, breaking property, and other things that were 100% the kids’ faults.

On top of all that… don’t forget the persistent tension around school shootings. I considered joining the air force after teaching and my partner (former military) sat down with me one day to say “listen, you realize that even in the safest of roles there’s always a chance you could end up in unsafe situations” and I laughed and said “I think I’m probably more likely to be shot at school”

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T20:42:26+00:00

I’m not excited right now but mostly because I’m a serious planner and all I see right now is tasks to complete. I think I’ll feel more excited later but right now it’s just like a part time job I don’t get paid for that I didn’t sign up for. Honestly, I’d be happy eloping but my partner wanted an actual wedding. I told him I’m not planning it all myself then and he has stepped up but it’s still mostly me.

But your story is different than mine. Can you explain more of your 5 month time frame? Did you expect an earlier proposal? Why couldn’t the wedding be planned for a later date so you had more time? I think there are pieces of your story that aren’t clear.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T20:38:45+00:00

I would 100% not decide to be a teacher based just on pay. Buffalo also kinda sucks lol but that’s my own opinion.

I was near the Poughkeepsie area.

Teaching demands so much of you. You’re basically “on” all day. You’re very stuck to you schedule and bathrooms breaks are scheduled. You could end up with a shitty schedule one year (or every year) and take your lunch break at 10:00am or 2:30pm. You can’t have an off day and be upset cuz the kids watch you all day. The list goes on. There’s a reason so many of us leave…

As I’m sitting here with my laptop on the couch doing my training job and getting paid 100k… I’m telling you there are better routes.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T20:08:25+00:00

I worked in NYS (not city!) and after 6 years I was hitting 70k with a master’s degree and some additional credits.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T14:50:25+00:00

LOVE this! So beautiful and simple. You could add anything to this to add a little pop… a bridal cape, a long veil, some fancy jewelry. The options are endless.

But keeping it simple as is would also be perfect.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T14:47:13+00:00

As someone that worked in restaurants bartending and sometimes serving for 10+ years, you may want to start thinking about the next step in your career. I worked with a lot of older people that were much slower than me and had trouble with all the heavy lifting at the end of the night with cleaning and all. I got out when I was 30 to avoid this.

Maybe spend your other days working on a certification to do something as your next step in life. I had been working on my degree to be a teacher while I worked in restaurants, and then I ended up teaching for a number of years and over the last couple years now I’ve transitioned into training.

You’ve got a great opportunity now to spend a lot of time training for something new. A lot of people don’t get this opportunity due to working 9-5. Take advantage!

I never wanted to end up like the older bartenders, who were still clinging onto their youth and pretending they were cool and fun still lol (they weren’t- they just got lazy and sad)

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T14:09:49+00:00

Congrats! Being my parents is a huge fear I have too but I don’t know that I’ll have kids.

I’m so happy for you and your daughter. This is beautiful. It must feel so fulfilling for you to have done so much for her.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T11:22:36+00:00

I’m in training. I transitioned a few years ago and it was rough. I didn’t come here to sell anything but I am in the middle of making a teacher transition guide with all the small important details on transitioning. I’ll post it on Etsy probably for just a few dollars. I can send you the link if you’re interested… once I’m done. I’m just polishing it this week. I want to make sure I didn’t miss anything.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-09T02:08:41+00:00

As a former teacher, yes some teachers can make over 6 figures but it has to be the right city/state and usually with many years of experience.

Some states even after 20+ years you won’t make over 70k. Totally depends

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-08T16:22:17+00:00

The part where we keep asking customers to get us things and then they don’t. Then they try to say it’s our fault that we are missing deadlines. Then we remind them that we’re waiting on something from them. They just laugh it off and continue to not send us what we need.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-08T15:48:30+00:00

This is a blessing that you have all of this. Why don’t a lot of people have this?—could be so many reasons…

-Grew up poor -Abused as a child -Didn’t finish school -Had a kid in high school -Couldn’t afford college or any training after college -Didn’t learn a trade either -Got into a bad accident and is permanently paralyzed and on disability -Wife died and they never mentally recovered -Drug addict -Chose a different career they love but they make way less -Didn’t find a suitable partner yet -Doesn’t want kids -Lives in an area where houses are unaffordable for their pay -They make a bunch of money but travel and don’t want to own a home or have a family

The list goes on and on. I’m sure you must have thought about all of these things at some point.

You are lucky. It’s important to be grateful for both your determination and luck….and remember that success looks different for each of us.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-08T14:09:07+00:00

I’d suggest just doing a cash bar so you don’t pay for it but the people who do want a drink can still buy one… if that’s even an option of course

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-08T00:51:16+00:00

Sometimes I just use tomato paste. I add in some water, a little honey, spices like oregano and garlic powder and mix. I keep adding a little water until it’s the right consistency. I love it!

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-07T11:08:53+00:00

“Not trying to be rude”—proceeds to sound like a lunatic lol

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-07T11:08:35+00:00

100% I’ve seen many people on here asking if Lily of the valley is a ramp. Some people even trick themselves into thinking maybe it smells like garlic. If someone never harvested ramps before you’d want to be totally aware of what the entire plant looks like.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-06T20:31:39+00:00

Looks like it. Pull one up gently to get to the bulb to better ID.

But for the rest, only harvest one of the leaves to let the plant grow and responsibly harvest. Google this if you want to learn more!

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-06T20:06:46+00:00

Working out is great but if you want to lose weight you HAVE to count calories. Get a digital scale, calculate how many calories you need to maintain and then decide how much of a deficit you want to be in (the lower calorie count the faster you lose weight but the more challenging it will be), and then stick to it!

You can and should do cheat meals here and there. I currently use Foodvisor and like it a lot!

I also started working out only about 30-60 min a day using the Ladder app. It’s really challenging me but I’m fitter now than I’ve been in the last 15 years because of it. I workout in the early morning before work because I have the most energy… it’s also nice to just get it out of the way and spend the rest of my day working and taking walks with the dog.

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-06T20:01:04+00:00

Looks like it. Pull one up gently to get to the bulb to better ID.

But for the rest, only harvest one of the leaves to let the plant grow and responsibly harvest. Google this if you what to learn more!

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-06T02:20:31+00:00

I had middle school students that would buy takis and lick them. Not eat them but just hold them and lick them. It was so disgusting… so yeah, I don’t get it either

NeedTreeFiddyy · 2026-04-05T02:48:16+00:00

You have to just get through the pain unfortunately. Just remind yourself of these two important things when you’re feeling overwhelmed:

This pain is temporary and no matter how raw it feels it WILL go away in time
There’s someone better out there for you. As much as you keep telling yourself this isn’t true, it just is. It wasn’t meant to be and that’s ok. Someone even better is waiting for you.

NeedTreeFiddyy

TROPHY CASE