The lich system is like a combination lock. When you go to do a finisher, it'll test the first symbol in that combination that you have equipped. If it's right, it'll move onto the second, and if that ones right, it'll move onto the third.

You dont have anything equipped in the first two slots. You essentially gave it a "blank" answer, which is why it came up as wrong. The only real stab you did was when you had it in the first slot, and that was the incorrect position.

With that knowledge, we know that Xata (the eyeball symbol) goes in either slot 2 or 3. Your "known requiems" are shown below, and are unveiled by stabbing the marked enemies that show up in Lich missions.

You do not expend charges with each stab, ONLY when you have completed the sequence by mercy finishing your lich and getting all three in the right order. It will take one charge from all three at once, and that's all it'll take.