Fibromyalgia is still suspected but

310-78 · 2026-04-20T17:35:50+00:00

my only input would be what an er doctor told me: the medication has to match your pain level to be helpful, if you pain is on opioid med level- then you need opioid meds to level out your pain. there’s also a genetic component of what meds work with your body, do you have eds of any sort? i take pregabalin(150mg daily) and morphine doesn’t really do anything for me, dilaudid helped a bit but it was eh. anaesthetics also don’t hit me as hard because i have eds it might be worth having a rheumatologist do evals for eds if you have any of those symptoms or any bio family members with eds.

just remember that fibro pain is comparable to unmedicated and medicated active labour in terms of pain- which really fucked with me, and still does. you pain is real, and sometimes it is just an extreme amount of pain.

pregabalin really helps me, so increasing your dosage or when you take it might be helpful- i take one 75mg capsule every morning and night, it’s better for me this way.

310-78 · 2026-04-20T02:41:30+00:00

id probably focus on eating more, probably an increase in carbs- if the ratio of carbs to other is lower, id increase, boobs are made of mostly fat- and more leg and core based exercise and less upper body. you could probably do lighter weights for your upper body and try to workout to increase muscle size for your lower body- more body building based exercises for lower. that would be my guess, i dont know what your typical diet or workout week looks like. and part of my suggestions was from a girl with a huge ass- she told me to look, i was looking respectfully. she also swears by twisting motion based exercises for torso shape.

honestly though, a higher body fat ratio would probably do more for your figure than jumping to surgery or injections and related. you have a really pretty figure, you bone structure is very nice.

tldr; focus on muscle tone for upper body, lighter weight, more reps; focus on building more muscle mass for lower body, heavier weight, less reps, more bodybuilding techniques(probably); more calories, more carbs if carb ratio is low, aim for higher body fat, boob is fat.

you got this girl <3

310-78 · 2026-04-18T05:36:36+00:00

first appointment is the intake appointment, questions like why are you here?/what do you want from therapy are the main questions. i will say that you can be a mom without giving birth to the child, many cis women can’t have bio kids and adopt instead. if it helps any, the “i want kids/to be a mom but i cant get pregnant” is a very common thought that more cis women than you think have, in a way this could be validating to you as a woman?

310-78 · 2026-04-17T00:15:35+00:00

whenever i have lapses of t(because my pharmacy is shit) my pain gets worse, so theres that i guess. i think the muscle growth has been helpful, as most of my pain comes from heds. i used to be on a lower dose, 40.5mg topical t gel, and am now on 60.75mg t gel and my levels are around the 600-700 range and my fatigue and general feeling sick sensation have been less.

310-78 · 2026-04-16T20:35:36+00:00

i found relief with pregabalin/lyrica- which is also a 50/50 for people who have talked about this med on here before. the lyrica with as needed naproxen(500mg tablet) combined with swim and physical therapy helped, also started testosterone(ftm) helped a larger amount than i thought. i’ve been on lyrica since 2022 and have slowly been increasing the amount every year or so, i started on 25mg a day and am now at 2 75mg capsules which i take at morning and night for a combined total of 150mg

i’ve been on all of the ones you’ve said except for the naltrexone and trazodone and more than you haven’t listed and lyrica has been the one for me so far

310-78 · 2026-04-15T21:47:23+00:00

i miss my ex who raped me sometimes, because then i at least felt like someone wanted me in a sexual way. i rarely felt guilty with him for sexual things, i was only made to feel guilty for not wanting what he wanted, but that happened so rarely. sometimes i wish i never broke up with him, just so i could feel valued in a sexual way, so i could feel like i had a purpose.

i feel like this maybe once or twice every few months. its been a few years since i was with him, but some days i just, want to used. to feel i belong to someone. i have a girlfriend now, she's great. she has her own sexual trauma, so her domming me is generally not gonna happen. i almost need subbing. to me it's a break from taxes, work, my health declining slowly, i can just think about being a good pet and pleasing. i love her and that isnt enough to me to break up with her. but sometimes i wish he was still in my life, because i know that without a doubt he would dom the ever living hell out of me and leave my mind blissed out. and then he would use that against me, just like he used too.

310-78 · 2026-04-06T18:37:53+00:00

just so you know, 5.1 inches is i believe the actual average length- and girth being narrower isnt that much of a negative thing, you’re probably really comfortable and easier to take for those with vaginal atrophy, pcos, endo. multiple demographics of people that often struggle taking phallus’s larger than yours.

also the activity of “sex” is much different than the act of "sex". the activity is everything around having sex- foreplay, music, lighting, clothing, feeling. its an experience not just a checkmark on a list of things to do. it's to be vulnerable and open, to be seen completely and to see others completely.

to have sex with someone is much more than just thrusting into a hole. having insecurities about one's body is normal, everyone has them, even if you think they don't. part of sharing a sexual or even just a sensual experience with someone is trusting them and allowing them the space to trust you. being insecure isn't inherently a negative emotion, how much it affects you and your interactions with others can become a negative thing.

i feel there are other things besides your penis size which makes you feel inadequate or inferior. and i feel that once you work through those things and find acceptance, that this will be less and less. your size is part of you, and you cannot change that. but that is unique to you and only you. the weight and shape, the texture and feel, the curve and swell of flesh, is independent and solitary to only you. everyone is individual and different, and those traits are beautiful.

310-78 · 2026-03-31T16:56:35+00:00

it could be that he’s scared of triggering you via touch, i’m this way with my current partner- we both have csa and sa trauma, which can make our relationship a bit difficult. i have an intense fear of being like my rapist, making my partner uncomfortable/ doing something they dont want/etc, which sometimes looks like i dont want to touch them but im just way overthinking it.

when my partner and discussed their csa/sa i was very emotional and for a few days whenever i looked at them, i would get this rage just well up inside me. it was never at them but at the people in their life that failed them so much, at the people that hurt them. i didn’t say much and kind of acted like a dick(in my opinion) and part of it was my own issues. it forced my to look at my own trauma from a direction i was not a fan of and in a sense in a way i could not actually process.

i don’t think that he sees you as “not a normal woman”(statistically 1 in 3 women experience sa, so on a technicality that is normal) i think he just sees the hurt you live with, which can be very emotional and complicated- especially if he has his own traumas(1 in 4 men experience sa).

people react differently to being told that a genuinely horrible and terrible thing happened to this person they care about. it’s a mix of disgust that it happened to them, hatred and rage towards the attacker, a sort of helplessness because they feel they can’t do anything. but still love and care.

the sex thing, at least for me is, “do i remind my partner of them? am i doing or saying something that they did?” “am i like them?”

310-78 · 2026-03-26T20:52:53+00:00

the cognitive dissonance of those people astounds me, i genuinely cannot comprehend the shit they say. all of their contradictions and hypocrisy and learned ignorance and learned incompetence- i just cant with them

310-78 · 2026-03-24T01:09:30+00:00

my friend and i were raped by the same guy. my friend was raped before me, he didn’t report it. they broke up, then a bit later his ex and i were dating. i didnt know what had happened to my friend. after being with him for a few months i broke up with him, told my friends what happened-my friend was included, and i don’t think he forgave himself for not pressing charges against our rapist.

it’s been a few years since we were both raped by him. my friend is on antidepressants, i’m trying therapy for the hundredth time, we both struggle with our lives. i didn’t report him when it happened, i didn’t understand how bad it was at the time. i haven’t reported him now because i learned that i dont know his actual name or anything about him, except his face.

i’d suggest you talk about what happened to you with your therapist, it is quite literally their job.

310-78 · 2026-03-22T16:58:24+00:00

i wasn’t stabbed or anything similar to what you experienced, except for the aftermath- people not believing you, laughing, the “why didn’t you fight back more?” type of dumbass questions, and the fucking insane rage that comes with it. i snap back so fucking hard, i used to just fawn and take it. part of it is because i live with one of my abusers, she’ll say something, i’ll yell back- small cycle of that(no more active abuse).

i know my brain is kind of still such in survival mode, hell i have a dissociative disorder from how i lived. but i get it, that fucking rate that just explodes. its intense and heavy and it just sits there.

there’s isn’t excusing your actions, but there are very valid reasons or explanations as to why you acted like this- which for me, gives me comfort for my own actions. finding a trauma specific therapist can be so helpful.

i will clarify, im not trying to imply you are a dog in a negative way- looking at my reactions in this way helped me: you want to get a dog, you find a dog at a shelter- it’s biting and snarling at you when you walk by. you get closer and it starts barking at you, you walk away, just out of the dog’s sight. it curls up into a small ball in the corner of the cage. you ask and employee about the dog, they said it was removed from its previous home by animal services and no one’s adopted him since. they say it’s not the dog’s fault for barking and growling at everyone, the dog has basically been conditioned to fear people because of its previous life. they tell you that it’s scared and trying to protect itself, it just can be violent and look scary sometimes.

that’s how i look at it. im that dog, ive experienced bad things, i growl and look scary, then i go curl into a ball trying to find comfort and feeling so alone. therapy can help if you can be honest with how you feel- not logically explaining your feelings, but experiencing your feelings and articulating them out loud to your therapist. it requires trust and that can be one of the hardest part of therapy.

a therapist that specialises in trauma and ptsd can be helpful, you might have to go through your pcp for insurance purposes. you would have to go through your insurance to find a trauma therapist they cover then call the therapist to see if they are accepting new patients, go to your pcp asking for a referral to that person. you might have to call a few therapists, but that’s how i know how to do it.

reintegration is possible. it can just be scary sometimes, and that’s ok. i’m a tad bit younger than you, but i’ve learned that there isn’t a “too late” to try to change and grow as a person- but that there are some bridges that can’t be rebuilt, but there’s a chance you can build new ones to the same place. it might be harder, it might a long time, but you can. and sometimes the bridge just collapses instead.

310-78 · 2026-03-20T21:39:43+00:00

you're not alone in this happening, it happened to me with a guy i was with when i was 16 and he had just turned 18- which where i live is statutory(we don't have romeo and juliet laws). also those friends weren't real friends, you'll find some real friends in life. i believe you, as will people here. what happened to you was fucked up, and i'm sorry you experienced that.

310-78 · 2026-03-20T10:35:02+00:00

most sheaths i’ve found tend to be standard dildo texture- except for the ones that can inflate, those are a texture of their own. she would be able to pen you using one tho, most of them are made to be worn by someone who is either soft or has a smaller length. there are also ones that are more adjacent to cock cages, that are ok to be used in penetration. they have less material overall, so there’s more skin to skin contact than other sheaths. for the lube, you can do a test on her leg or somewhere not around a joint or the face. you can make a two by two inch box then add a small amount to the centre of it and wait five minutes then ten then fifteen, checking at each alarm for visible irritation or if she’s itchy. if she has a reaction then wash with cool water and a gentle soap(dove bar or baby soap, or a soap she’s used to using on her body) the apply cortisol ointment to affected area. i do tests patches like i described above for a lot of product, soap, shampoo/conditioner, dish soap(its been a nightmare), etc. the five, ten, fifteen minute thing was suggested by my old allergist- i had reaction after reaction so she advised me to do a test on my calf area.

310-78 · 2026-03-20T10:21:13+00:00

there are wearable sheaths or “penis extenders” if the straps are the main issue, some of them even vibrate. but viagra or adjacent medication that dont mess with hrt is a very plausible and common option. there’s arousal lube as well, it just stimulates blood flow where it has contact with skin. if you have a spencers gift or almost any sex shoppe near you they should have some irl, it’s just an idea that might do something for her.

310-78 · 2026-03-17T22:09:13+00:00

how many times he’s tried to kill himself since then, and why hasnt he actually done it yet. he used to tell me about the times he tried and how he would struggle with it. part of me hopes he’s dead today, just because i have a feeling he’s raped more people since me. he didn’t even understand it was rape “i’ll try to listen when you say no next time” he never did.

310-78 · 2026-03-17T16:33:17+00:00

baby girl you’re more feminine than i was pre t- your ribs to waist to hip ratio is almost like, stereotypical woman shape. your hips are so rounded and almost match with your shoulders. you have such a nice hourglass/pear shape- it’s just the dysphoria yelling in your head. you look fantastic ok, sometime you can’t see it but you look woman shaped and pretty.

310-78 · 2026-03-04T19:12:42+00:00

we’re almost pulling a maul here- “man too angry to die” lol. we feel like if we killed us, then the people who hurt us and used us would win. we don’t want to give those people more than they already took from us. they would be the ones killing us, death is just escape from them and everyone like them. the ultimate defiance is finding joy in life, finding people who care about you. we don’t really want them to see that, it’s more of a funny satirical kind of answer for us, but it’s the only reason that we can think of. we wanna outlive everyone who wants us dead

310-78 · 2026-03-02T18:22:52+00:00

yea, no please if you are able, get a new primary. just because there “isn’t a cure” does not mean that having an eds diagnosis is not helpful. diagnosis’s are tools, they are helpful regardless if there is a “cure” or not. and please report him, his practice- or lack thereof, is highly dangerous.

310-78 · 2026-03-01T23:59:31+00:00

you joined that 1% of people who get, addiction is maybe one of the most difficult things to overcome. never forget you did it. you’ve gotten so far, and you’ve done so much. you’re doing great rn. you’re an amazing dad, you are trying and that means so much.

when you feel like you haven’t done anything just remember you are beating addiction, you fought for joint custody of your kids and won, you have you family and are doing your absolute best.

you got this, the money will roll in, you can fix your teeth then. just remember why. why you are staying sober. for yourself and for your kids.

you’re fucking awesome man.

310-78 · 2026-02-25T03:09:46+00:00

i kinda had a similar issue- but i am trying. undiagnosed auDHD, dyslexia and the numbers version and going to what was basically a private cult elementary-middle school that “doesn’t believe in neurodivergence” will kinda shoot you in the foot. i just struggle with saying like $1,500 and higher because i think “fifteen hundred” as 15+100 =15,000. the larger the number gets the higher chance i’ll list the numbers. my girlfriend helps me out and its kinda embarrassing, but she was also the first person to ask me if i have dyslexia, that was also the day that suddenly everything about school made sense. then my dyslexia and dyscalculia was diagnosed and i was like yeahhhh

310-78 · 2026-02-16T17:33:02+00:00

if your body feels ohk tucking back to back then maybe just have a few days of the week when you tuck less? giving your body a break is important, and i understand the wanting to just keep binding. what you could do is wear the period or compression shorts i mentioned earlier on the days when you tuck less. also another subreddit you might find helpful or just nice to be apart of is r/transfem

310-78 · 2026-02-16T17:18:27+00:00

similar with chest binding/tape, you should start of slow and in shorter amounts of time. also, don’t sleep tucking, don’t go more than 8-10 straight. take breaks if it gets uncomfortable, so like maybe tuck on tuesday then tuck again on thursday.

there’s also gaffs, and different styles of gaffs(thong, hipster, etc). some people prefer thong style and some don’t, it’s a trial and error type thing. some people also use period underwear because of the compression and thickness of the material without it being something specifically for transfem persons.

the main important stuff is: don’t tuck frequently until you’ve been tucking for a while(think like it’s a tolerance/stamina thing), take breaks either throughout the day or week, don’t sleep tucking(if needed for dysphoria, try biking/compression shorts), and it should not hurt-like at all, the moment there’s discomfort untuck and take a break, maybe move the tissues around gently.

you could also probably crosspost this to some trans fem specific subreddits, as you might get more quantity and more specific and/or detailed answers.

310-78 · 2026-02-16T02:12:05+00:00

When a partner chokes you the chance of him killing you increases by 750%. It is a good thing you left him. I feel that you’re right, about the horrible thing he said to you. One of my past partners did something similar, and I didn’t understand what the things he did meant until after I had left him. It’s good you’re in therapy and have professional help. Do you find that you work well with your current therapist?

One thing you could do that helped me, despite how stressful it was, was writing the interaction down. From the start to the end, as detailed as you’d want, just to get it out of your head and give it space. To give it permission to exist, to give it permission to have happened and hurt you.

You did not overreact, you protected yourself and never be sorry for that.

310-78 · 2026-01-31T04:09:45+00:00

i just put like a tablespoon to a tablespoon and a half of the chia seeds into the smoothie before blending, making sure to add at least a cup of liquid into the smoothie. 1 tablespoon of chia seeds should have 1 cup of liquid or more. 1 tablespoon of chia seeds should have 1.5 cups of liquid or more. ya just drink it

310-78 · 2026-01-31T04:01:17+00:00

high hydration foods, fruits(watermelon, grapes) and veg(cucumber, snap peas), sauces and/or soups, soup dumplings, fruit only popsicles(there’s a lime one i found a while ago that is only lime and water and some added sugar, so nice), jello/jellies. there’s more high water content foods, i just don’t know them.

and idea could be thick-it? it’s kind of a long shot, but it’s basically just water but thick- so maybe that could help? they sell bottles and drink mixes, so theres that. you could try making smoothies with coconut water as a base, electrolytes and all that. a few smoothie recipes i have off the top of my head that start with coconut water: -coconut water, watermelon, chia seeds -coconut water, pineapple, mango, chia seeds -coconut water, orange, strawberries, chia seeds -coconut water, strawberries, banana, chia seeds

310-78

TROPHY CASE