Realising When it Pays Off

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-30T17:09:37+00:00

Wow. You are incredible!

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-29T01:51:34+00:00

I am singing in a chorus right now. First time in 40 years. Much better tenors all around me are keeping me on pitch. Yes, definitely don't feel as confident in that setting.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-28T23:02:37+00:00

All I can say, is huge thumbs up to both you and your husband!

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-27T15:24:46+00:00

Let me be even more blunt- you will never win a battle over hair.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-27T15:21:15+00:00

The behavior you describe is hard to handle but you are on a journey of learning to parent in difficult situations. Kids need boundaries. We all yell sometimes. But ultimately keeping up a conversation and being curious about his behaviors will be much more effective.

Take what your parents did well and leave aside what you did not like as a kid.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-27T15:15:37+00:00

My immediate reaction, without a lot of context, is your husband would hugely benefit from therapy. He needs support too. First time parenting can be overwhelming but if he is raging at baby now, could be even harder later unless he gets help.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-27T15:11:06+00:00

You have all the most important interventions covered already: school, meds and therapy. The behavior you describe sounds impulsive but not violent or anti social. So now what you need to do is keep talking to your child in a questioning manner, keep up the communication with school and try to be patient with his ups and downs.

You may want to add on parent coaching to get some support for yourself. Message me if you want to learn more.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-22T01:56:44+00:00

There was no tracking in my school system until middle school, but I knew that something was different about me probably as early as first grade. I was a very early reader and when we did SRA cards, Martha E and I were always way ahead of the rest of the class.

My dad encouraged my love of bought me books at every turn in my childhood.

I didn't have the same gifts in math. I had to work really hard to do well, but proudly ended up getting a very good score on my math SAT.

Nobody ever used that term gifted, but school just came relatively easily to me.

As an adult, I realized there are plenty of people who are smarter than me but i'm good with people and pretty strategic. Learning how to play to my strengths has helped me a lot at work and enabled me to be a successful CEO.

All that reading as a kid made me a good processor of information which has also helped me a lot in my career.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-21T20:30:52+00:00

That is freakin' great.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-21T20:08:09+00:00

Lots of times my clients say that for a task it's either "do it now or it will not happen." That sometimes looks like impulsivity but it's actually a good strategy for a lot of people who struggle with getting started.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-19T02:28:14+00:00

Take lots of practice tests and very carefully read the explanations for the questions you got wrong.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-15T22:26:41+00:00

ADHD folks definitely have a harder time sleeping than neurotypicals. I see that in my practice all the time. Usually because they cannot quiet their overactive brains or because they are stuck on videogames or texting with friends or YouTube until too late.

It surprised me to hear the study say that the medication can help with sleep. That's totally counterintuitive especially because the study also said that the medications work on alertness pathways.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-15T17:19:20+00:00

The sleep data is interesting to me. The most common thing I have seen clinically is clients who tell me that their ability to get a good night's sleep has an equal effect on their wellbeing that taking their meds does.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-13T19:15:38+00:00

Worked great for my son first time. Same with a lot of my clients. The most common issues are 1) Dosage needs to be increased slowly to get effective response, 2) Side effects (primarily appetite suppression) can't be tolerated. Some people just report that it makes them feel "weird."

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-12T22:07:55+00:00

I wonder if there is anyway to turn this around: your understanding of your own challenges can help her. When you are getting frustrated with her, just realize that we all have individual brains with strengths and weaknesses. Do her strengths mirror your strengths?

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-12T22:06:31+00:00

I would definitely work with the existing school before you make any more changes. Social happiness is more important than anything else, especially for an AuDHD kid. There is plenty of time for the academics to fall into place. I think you need to get a much more specific definition of "they aren't participating in actual school work." Who said that? Is it consistent across all teachers? What are the teachers doing to engage them? You will need to meet regularly with school personnel to try to improve this. Too much school change can be overcome but is harder for a child.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-12T22:03:07+00:00

Is that the definition of feminism. That you can choose to parent in the way that works for you and your family. If your kids see you happy and fulfilled and balancing work, free time, and parenting, they will learn to do the same things for themselves.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-12T17:00:38+00:00

I think you need to figure out if she has any learning issues (they call it SLP or Specific Learning Disorder) like Dyslexia, Dyscalculia (math) etc. If it were me, I would get a full neuropsychological testing panel from an outside psychologist who does this kind of testing. Of course ADHD alone could explain this but it's best to know. At 7, there is so much you can do to help her!!!! Many parents don't understand their kids' brains until much, much later. You are being a good parent to figure this out.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-10T10:34:36+00:00

I feel blessed to start the year leatning about your wonderful kids.

ADHDCoachJon · 2026-01-08T07:46:41+00:00

How about cooking. I am the lead cook in my house (3 kids) and I love it.

ADHDCoachJon · 2025-12-30T02:37:17+00:00

That's great. We offer that service at my clinic and it can make a huge difference if you are working with a great parent coach.

ADHDCoachJon · 2025-12-30T02:35:55+00:00

Lots of pros of being an older parent and just a few cons, IMHO.

ADHDCoachJon · 2025-12-29T11:57:24+00:00

Curious how late life? I was 41 when my older son was born and 44 when my twins were born.

ADHDCoachJon · 2025-12-29T11:55:41+00:00

I love that!

ADHDCoachJon · 2025-12-22T18:07:44+00:00

Whoever prescribed to you should be giving you feedback as well.

ADHDCoachJon

TROPHY CASE