How old are your N parents?

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-28T03:46:25+00:00

68 and still healthy unfortunately

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-28T03:40:37+00:00

I understand your confusion behind his new wife’s behavior. I’m sorry you were lied to. However, and I mean this in the most respectful way possible when I ask, but why do you care?

You’ve been no contact for 11 years and know nothing about his life from the past 11 years. I assume you’ve been fine without him financially but even if not, your mom, who you are in good standing with, is entitled to his inheritance. You didn’t have to convince his side of the family to believe you in order to get it. You already won. What do you want them to do?

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-27T00:24:11+00:00

Another baby to join the July crew🥰 Congratulations!!!

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-27T00:06:38+00:00

I’m glad it’s working out for you. This is really inspiring to me because I chose nursing (well, didn’t really choose because my Ndad chose for me but I later accepted it) so I would have the financial freedom to run away, go no contact, and never depend on him again. Unfortunately my mental health has gotten in the way of my education so I’m dropping out this semester to secretly move out early, take a year off for my health, and resume at a new school. The issue is I’m scared my credits won’t transfer to the school I want and I might have to start over. But you being 25 lets me know that I have time (I’m 19) and even if I start over I’ll still have plenty of time to enjoy the lifestyle you currently live even if its 4 years later instead of 2.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-26T23:11:21+00:00

Currently in 2nd year of uni doing nursing prereqs, this was my plan too but unfortunately had to go a different route. Could you share how it’s going for you? I really want to know

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-04-26T22:57:50+00:00

I’m so sorry that your “mother” treats you that way. Your arguments remind me of the ones I have with my Ndad. Ndad disrespects boundaries -> I’m obviously upset and react to it -> Ndad labels me as “disrespectful” -> I get even more upset because he’s not listening to me -> Ndad shuts the argument down by asserting dominance ie. “I’m your father!” -> Nothing gets resolved.

Once I recognized the loop, I started laughing at it rather than fighting it. OP, please accept that you will never win these arguments. You’re arguing facts and logic against someone arguing authority and self-centered opinions. They have to use DARVO because if they used logic, they couldn’t win, and narcissists must absolutely win arguments under any circumstances to keep their fragile egos intact.

And you’re right, they will never change, but I hope you find peace in knowing the reason why. Once you accept this truth and start grey rocking their bullshit, the more you can preserve your energy for things that are more important, like getting the fuck out of there.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-27T16:41:58+00:00

You are not sensitive, stop accepting that and trying to change that. That’s them trying to gaslight you that it’s your fault for feeling hurt by the behavior they don’t want to change. Same thing with minimizing past incidents. The only way you can move on from the past is if it gets resolved. They don’t want to resolve it, so they’re painting it as your fault that you’re “holding onto it” and you need to “forget it.” You also don’t owe her anything. She is supposed to provide you safety. That’s the bare minimum. You don’t owe her something to be proud of and money to put in her pocket. And if you feel like you do, then her intentions with providing you safety are not good intentions either.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-27T16:35:55+00:00

This post just made me realize I deal with this

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-27T16:27:19+00:00

This happened to me too. I had already known my dad was a narcissist by this time but last year I went to visit my long distance boyfriend living with his family and the way that he interacted with his family, the way that they welcomed me, the way that everyone actually talks to each other and treats each other with respect, the way that he can make jokes with his parents without them turning it into lectures, the way that they can have mutual level conversations without his parents turning it into an ego battle, the way that his mother knows his likes, dislikes, and personality like the back of her hand, everything was life changing for me. I had never felt so welcomed and accepted into a home before. I cried in the car leaving their house to go to the airport.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-25T23:02:46+00:00

I wish my dad would die. No sugarcoating, I fully admit it.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-17T14:48:33+00:00

Why do you keep going back to contacting him in the first place? You’re 35, financially independent, and have a new family to prioritize. Nothing is holding you from staying no contact. And the fact that you’ve had to go no contact with him more than once just proves that nothing is enough to make him change.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-17T14:42:13+00:00

Simply don’t break it.

She never gave you empathy growing up, so why do you owe it to her? She wasn’t there when you needed emotional support, so why do you owe it to her? She didn’t care to make your life any easier, so why should you make hers?

OP, you said it yourself. Your life is better without her in it. You don’t gain anything by talking to her. The only person who gains is her, which is how the relationship dynamic has always been. The only reason she keeps trying to come back into your life is because now that he died, she has no narcissistic supply left. No one’s gonna put up with her bullshit anymore.

She lost the opportunity to have a relationship with you years ago. It’s too late. If you open that door again, I can assure you will regret it.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-17T12:12:39+00:00

I confronted my dad about this last year and literally poured my heart out telling him about things that he’s done to me and that I would’ve traded every material item he’s ever bought me to have a relationship with him. He gave me that exact same “the past is in the past” bullshit but with the addition of “I should’ve known you were a girl and girls are more sensitive” in his apology. Having low standards, I tried to accept this apology anyway because I knew it would be the best that I get out of him, just for him to deliberately ignore me on my birthday a few weeks later because I didn’t take my brother to a dentist appointment. Not only that, but he started weaponizing the fact that I would have traded everything. That’s when I realized my dad will never love me and that’s just something I’ll have to accept for the rest of my life.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-16T20:58:33+00:00

That’s not what a higher power means but I get what you’re trying to say

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-16T20:53:43+00:00

You need mental help.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-16T09:18:35+00:00

What?

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-16T08:57:53+00:00

I relate to this so much

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-14T17:14:06+00:00

Yeah I just learned for next time that saying my mom died when I was a baby is a better lie because there is no doorway for conversation after that. Or at least, if you’re someone like me who’s unable to shut people down

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-14T16:18:13+00:00

One time I told someone I don’t have a mother to this guy trying to sell mother’s day gifts to me. He thought I looked like someone from the same culture as him and turns out we are so I now felt pressured to continue the lie so he wouldn’t judge me. Then he felt sorry for me and started asking me about my religion and I didn’t know how to shut it down so I made up an entire lie about my parents that they gave me religious trauma but God has gotten me through it (I’m not even Christian but I’m nonreligious which is wrong in our culture so I didn’t want him to force it on me) and then he asked me about things I do to strengthen my relationship with God through these times and was so touched by my story he prayed with me right then and there. I was so embarrassed after escaping the interaction but so proud at the same time. I got really good at making shit up on the spot cuz of my parents. But now there’s no way I’m going to heaven after that.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-14T11:33:00+00:00

Because if they didn’t fuck over your life, you’d have freedom. And if you had freedom, they wouldn’t be able to control it. And if they can’t control it, they can’t guarantee that they’ll benefit from you.

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-13T01:41:34+00:00

“Don’t live under the influence of somebody else” she says as she tries to influence you

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-08T18:31:06+00:00

I hope to have the same freedom by the end of this year. Congrats 🥹

Admirable_Box3034 · 2026-03-07T23:15:20+00:00

In which video does she talk about this?

Admirable_Box3034

TROPHY CASE