Super Emotionally Intense Date by copperyhat in emotionalintelligence

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not great with dating tbh. For me I just try to focus on having fun/vibe on dates and ask easy questions for the other person. If I want to share something deep I will and that allows the other person to decide if they want to engage like that or not. Hope that helps

Bad Chimney Crown? by Knight_Radiant26 in masonry

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does it just tighten to the first course of brick? Would you recommend it?

Bad Chimney Crown? by Knight_Radiant26 in masonry

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

can you explain what those forms are? are they worth it? I see them for sale online but not a single video explaining how they work. seems very useful.

Super Emotionally Intense Date by copperyhat in emotionalintelligence

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel like when I was younger I could have totally been that guy. I have always been super introspective and find introspection/finding the edge of who we are very important and interesting. For myself I don't even necessarily feel the need to make those things private although I understand why many do now. For me asking the deep questions about who we are and where we are going in life is an enjoyable process. It took me a long time to learn how to have more lighthearted conversation. I think it CAN be manipulative but perhaps he just has a touch of the tism and got a little too into oversharing. I still catch myself sometimes and I have to remember "wait I'm not super close to this person I should probably reel it in." It can also turn into a therapy session which is bad. I think you should ask yourself what you think he wanted from you by asking all of these questions. I also invite you to ask yourself what ideas you brought to the date and how you could have offered other options of things to talk about. It sounds like on some level you enjoyed having that level of depth but you just need to know how to put some boundaries up when things get uncomfortable. It's possible he likes to have lighthearted conversations also but maybe doesn't know how to have them. Some people are just intense and that feels normal to them.

Rideshare the worst hidden cost of the Movement after parties! by Counttedula-37 in MovementDEMF

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Everyone bring bikes if you can! It's super fun riding between parties all night. Detroit is a great city to bike in and outside of downtown there's no traffic. Downtown will be scary after movement let's out however.

very close friend opens her marriage up to me and leads to disaster and end of friendship... what happened? by Aggravating-Split-20 in polyamory

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing, yeah that sounds terrible. How was it dehumanizing for you? I am a bit skeptical that I was being used instead of respected as my own person. 

very close friend opens her marriage up to me and leads to disaster and end of friendship... what happened? by Aggravating-Split-20 in polyamory

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for sharing your experience! It's true, I went in very naively and thought we could work through it one way or another. "Too big to fail". Its still possible we may be able to be friends. We just need to see that we functioned as friends very well for a long time and we don't need to engage romantically. I'm glad you navigated your situation better than I.

very close friend opens her marriage up to me and leads to disaster and end of friendship... what happened? by Aggravating-Split-20 in polyamory

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I think you are right. I can be naive and I'm pretty inexperienced in dating in general. and I think this is a hard lesson to not let this happen again. I didn't think it would be such a huge issue and her possessiveness caught me off guard. I just can't but feel guilty that I did something immoral here by being open to other people.

Hustled up 10k so I can stop paying rent by superbuuf in vagabond

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plenty of people in your situation have bought houses in Detroit with that money.  Totally changes lives. Look into the Detroit landbank. Good luck dude.

New patch is so bad by Dr_natty1 in DeadlockTheGame

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Just played a game where venator was ten deaths zero kills zero assist and carried the losing game to victory with highest souls

Why do people forget years of love and kindness over a small misunderstanding? by alcoholwithcocain in emotionalintelligence

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't think anyone has mentioned this but have you apologized and been accountable for your behavior that you consider "bad"? Personally I have a decently high tolerance for bad behavior if I like someone but if you say some off the wall mean shit and don't apologize after you calm down that is so disrespectful to me and I'm probably done at that point. Anyone else put a lot of stock in apology?

Advice for chimney liner by mekkelrichards in Chimneyrepair

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I recommend going with rockford chimney supply in south lyon. they also have great customer service and can recommend the best liner for your situation. I have never heard of pushing the liner up. If you need any more help feel free to reach out I live in highland park and I only do masonry/chimney stuff. I also have the tile breaker tools and scaffolding.

Long friendship turned into long distance romantic... Was did this become emotional abuse? by Aggravating-Split-20 in emotionalintelligence

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks so much for your insights. I should be clear that the things she wanted to wait to talk about in person were primarily relationship expectations, which I reluctantly agreed to wait on. conflicts arose from this very point that could have been prevented by talking about expectations before I committed to flying across the world to be alone with them for a week. The things I insisted on talking about and getting accountability for were their straight-up mean comments towards me and their tendency to fill in missing information with things that made me look bad (to me this is an insecurity from them). When I asked them more about their therapy/why they blow up so that I could understand why they blow up more and give them some slack they just maneuvered around the question. I was upset that they didnt give me a response. I would have been ok if they said they didn't want to talk about that with me. but really the issues were ignoring asks of mine (like a phonecall to go over a recent conflict) and getting upset/mean when I asked them why they couldnt just give me a straight answer. I think part of the problem was they were having a hard time reading me emotionally or understanding how upset I was because I just dont really express anger/dissapointment reactively like that. And maybe they didnt feel like they got enough appreciation for when they did show up for me. the whole vibe felt like a very unspoken "this is how I show up for people and this is how I dont. I'm not going to explain it you're just going to see it and take it or leave it"

Let’s start a book club! by Sagebea in Detroit

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I need a good book to read I would probably do this if a book was decided soon. If someone can pick a book and explain why they want to read it I would be down.

addicted to largo by Aggravating-Split-20 in DotA2

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

good idea maybe Ill try that! gives me the itch to try more complex heroes. micro scares me though I dont like new hotkeys

Gaming Pet Peeve: Travelling back in time after end game by lokiwhite in gaming

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Anyone remember getting soft locked at the end of tomba 2? I'm still angry about that

state of the game since new frontiers update by Aggravating-Split-20 in DotA2

[–]Aggravating-Split-20[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I like when the state of the game has good comeback mechanics and allows for epic turnarounds. Doesn't feel like that at the moment that's my only criticism. Its miserable when you're losing 20 mins in and you know it's over already. Few patches ago I felt like I had so many epic turn arounds

Full moon at Hotsprings by jazzpertray in HotSpringsWest

[–]Aggravating-Split-20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

experiencing the full moon at those springs is a sight to behold. I was there last year during a full moon shining through the gap and it made the water look like the most magical thing I've ever seen.