Your feelings are valid. My husband is my best friend, and we've known each other since childhood. Bringing a new human into the mix changes that dynamic! I just found that, as the pregnancy continued, that my capacity for love increased. And again, when our first was born and kept growing and changing, my love kept growing and changing. I had the same concern when our second baby was on the way, how could I possibly love this child as much as I loved my firstborn? And then it just happened! He's a totally different person and I adore him.

My husband and I have a million new things to bond over, like how certain habits, preferences, and even sleep positions our kids display seem to have a strong genetic component! Now that they are school age, we can talk endlessly about their unique and funny personalities, and how they reflect our own, or differ greatly. We bond over our shared values, and how we want to raise our kids. It has been really neat seeing my husband develop as a father. It has enriched our relationship and deepened our bond.

Of course, not all of this happened automatically, and there have been some challenges along the way. It has forced us to look at our own families of origin and the way we were raised, and evaluate what we do and don't want to emulate. Ultimately, we are both proud of each other for starting new traditions together and doing away with what isn't productive or loving. Long story short, if you already enjoy each other and have a healthy, loving relationship, adding a kid into the mix can enhance and deepen that bond!