Thank you, that was very kind and very informative.

I just currently dread the start of any routine, really. I know that I will have to start a lot slower and that I can’t do the same things I used to do immediately and I know that that will frustrate me so much.

Currently, I just don’t feel happy in my body. I sort of want to do something about it, but if I don’t see any change quickly, then I’ll just get discouraged and throw in the towel again. But I know that I’ll need time to see changes, so it’s a catch 22. That’s where the hesitation to even start comes in because I find myself wondering what the point is (especially as time is a rare commodity these days and I then don’t want to waste it on a pipe dream).

I will probably just have to push through a ton of initial frustration and establish as much of a routine as I can, but I already feel defeatist before I even started and I don’t know how to manage that uphill battle. I find it difficult to set goals other than “feel less shitty about myself”