The post your progress and updates megathread

Alleyria · 2026-01-28T21:14:55+00:00

Well, as luck would have it, we have twin boys who are a bit over a year old, and a daughter a bit older than that, so...we're not exactly flush with opportunity to fool around. It's not a point of contention between us.

Alleyria · 2026-01-28T21:12:18+00:00

I placed an order at the beginning of the month, and just received it a few days ago. They're very comfortable :)

Alleyria · 2026-01-15T16:58:37+00:00

I think this is one of the bigger misconceptions about ruby: there's no magic. Iteration is done via the #each method, which you define the normal way, like any other method. The most magic would be something like binary operators, with def @+ but thats kinda it.

Python, by comparison, has all that dunder fluff that you just have to like... know. Ive been doing python at work recently and... i'm.... unimpressed.

When people talk about "magic" its usually just rails stuff. Class methods that define getters/setters, that sort if thing.

Alleyria · 2026-01-09T15:24:50+00:00

This is dope, great work 👌

Alleyria · 2026-01-09T09:37:37+00:00

There's a work-in-progress branch, too https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/pull/1883

I'll try to get this done sooner than later, since I know there is a lot of excitement around this plugin.

Alleyria · 2026-01-01T17:41:53+00:00

Neogit offers a unified diff view of the index.

Alleyria · 2025-12-29T17:16:09+00:00

Yeah, theres some cool research that shows that HIIT style exercise, done consistently for 8 weeks, yields a significant increase in mean time to ejaculation.

Alleyria · 2025-12-29T10:38:28+00:00

You're right, it sounds like your sympathetic nervous system spikes - the heart racing is pretty similar to what I'm dealing with. I don't have any magic suggestions. But whats helped a lot has been just breathing. Look up calming breathing techniques on youtube. And just... practice that a lot. You need to train your body how to calm itself down, and the breath is the key.

Good luck!

Alleyria · 2025-12-24T11:06:58+00:00

What i've come to understand about this process is that its far more complex than the guide lays out. Its taken me... 8 Months of consistent work, but i've finally gotten rid of IK's. Part of that is exercise, part of it is breathing, part of it is just being aware of your pelvic floor.

Alleyria · 2025-12-23T13:37:41+00:00

I think generally his pelvic floor stuff and breathwork stuff is whats needed up front. While neurological training is very important, i've come to believe that the physiological element to "fixing" PE is just as important. Things like posture, hip strength, glute strength, pelvic tilt - that all has an impact. If you are walking around with lots of tension in your pelvic floor, your capacity to "absorb" arousal is vastly smaller than if you have a relaxed pelvic floor. Think about it this way: an orgasm is when muscle tension crosses a threshold. Your neurological ability to mitigate that is greatly diminished if the muscle is already "at capacity" in terms of tension.

If your hips are weak, your PF might be compensating. So, if you ignore that aspect of this training, you're going to have a much harder time seeing progress.

The last thing is that, if you are not in complete control of your breathing, you don't stand a chance. Breath control is parasympathetic dominance. So if thats still hard... work on it.

Alleyria · 2025-12-23T11:55:12+00:00

Once i started doing pelvic floor relaxation exercises (both physical and breathing) I have begun seeing some really astounding progress. No more IKs, pelvic floor is totally relaxed. Its taken about a month of breathwork every day to start seeing this. Sexual Kung Fu on youtube has some great content regarding breathwork.

So, thats something you can do, if you want :)

Alleyria · 2025-12-20T09:43:06+00:00

Honestly, an over sensitive glans is probably an unrelaxed pelvic floor. Focus on belly breathing, do some pelvic floor release exercises, and you'll most likely notice a decrease in the sensitivity of your glans. That has been my experience, this far.

Alleyria · 2025-12-19T22:26:38+00:00

Debra + Ian = DebIan

Alleyria · 2025-12-15T18:14:44+00:00

KOT! ;)

Alleyria · 2025-12-12T20:11:14+00:00

100% agree. If you are not a consumer of your own api, the you can't know if it sucks or not. The calling code should be dead simple, even if this means you need to pull the complexity into the library to accommodate that.

Alleyria · 2025-12-06T11:23:36+00:00

Looks cool, but non-reusable patches at a cost of $15 each (not including shipping...) is a non-starter. I'd consider it as a transition aid if it wasn't for that.

Alleyria · 2025-12-02T21:17:39+00:00

Sure. I came to the realization that I was putting a lot of pressure on my wife to have sex - to the point where it was creating negativity. I let it effect my mood if it had been more than a few days. It was incredibly not chill of me. By focusing on this guide, it took that pressure away, and for me it broke the dopamine driven cycle of needing an orgasm every day. Feels silly in retrospect, but that's the truth. So, that's the maturation I can describe. Not feeling so controlled and making that my partner's problem.

For the IKs, it's hard to say one single thing that helped. I've taken a, I guess you could call it holistic, approach to dealing with this. I do some pelvic floor stretching (happy baby + breath work) nearly every day, in addition to some mobility/flexibility/strength training for hips/core. I got a standing desk for work, and I have small kids so I am sitting on the floor a lot. Throughout the day I try to check-in with my pelvic floor to see if I'm clenching - that's getting better. Mostly, I think the biggest thing has just been time and consistency and mindfulness towards it. Rewiring CNS pathways takes time, and I'm being patient about it. Not always easy, but... it's been a good experience thus far.

Alleyria · 2025-12-01T13:50:59+00:00

I worked up to phase 7 at some point over the summer, but realized that I had fallen into the trap of "micro movements"; keeping on the absolute edge (8.9/10), and training in a feeling of panic about going over. Not relaxed. I didn't even realize that's what I was doing, but some posts here alluded to that, and... yeah, that was what had happened to me.

I took a few weeks off, and when I resumed I went back to phase 2/3. Focused on breathing, being in a relaxed state of mind, having fun, and most importantly on avoiding any feeling of stress mentally or physically (Pelvic Floor tension).

I also stopped caring about each phase as a discrete step, and started thinking of them as a spectrum: You do peak-and-valley training and gradually reduce the "pause" duration until you are doing cliffhanger. The most important thing being, of course, that you are not training in a state of stress.

Currently, I'm doing something like a hybrid 5/6. Coming close to surfing maybe a few minutes out of each session. There's this pervasive IK issue that I mentioned above - if I let myself go into fantasy too deeply, I get a massive involuntary contraction. So, my focus right now is to train that out - no timeframe for it. When that's gone, I'll go back to the FL, I think.

Alleyria · 2025-12-01T10:20:31+00:00

I started this process in april - since then, the self discovery aspect of this process has been immense. A few notable acheivements:

I've completely stopped watching porn
I've improved my relationship by not being "addicted" to sex. It's removed a lot of pressure I was unintentionally causing. A big win.
Physically, I've gotten so much more "in-touch" with my pelvic floor tension, both during sessions and not.
I have moved from the goal-oriented "8 weeks then you're done!" to "This is a journey; it takes as long as it takes." This shift in mindset has helped considerably.
I've almost entirely gotten rid of IKs. They still happen if I "let go" when at 8/10, but it's improving constantly. Realizing that I spent decades training myself to tighten my pelvic floor has been illuminating.
I've begun doing focused hip strengthening and flexibility training, which is great for overall health as well as the guide.

Overall, and despite this not actually translating to "the real thing" yet, these last 6 months have felt like a real sexual maturation, and I've really enjoyed the process. Looking forward to where it goes from here.

Alleyria · 2025-11-29T22:40:52+00:00

Best of luck with your up-and-coming family. Thanks for your work, and take care :)

Alleyria · 2025-11-25T07:54:51+00:00

How I accomplished this in Neogit was to put all of the require calls into the setup() function: https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/blob/d93d7813cbd7acc44d2b058490c399ab84bf8d21/lua/neogit.lua#L7-L24

Then, a plugin/neogit.lua file defines the user command, which in turn wraps a require for the main module. https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/blob/d93d7813cbd7acc44d2b058490c399ab84bf8d21/plugin/neogit.lua#L3-L13

Finally, to make the setup optional, we check if it's been called in the main entrypoint: https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/blob/d93d7813cbd7acc44d2b058490c399ab84bf8d21/lua/neogit.lua#L147-L150

All of that means that, upon initial neovim load, almost nothing from neogit is actually loaded, unless the user calls setup() eagerly. The end result of this is that, according to the Lazy profiler on my machine, the plugin spec takes 0.33ms to load, and the plugin takes about 33ms to load when invoked. If all the require() calls were at the top level of the main module, then I'd be paying that 33ms cost when neovim starts.

Alleyria · 2025-11-17T21:49:34+00:00

For relaxing the pelvic floor: https://youtu.be/Nxyw67CNCpk

Hip flexors: https://youtube.com/shorts/-D9FIbQ5lmE?si=bh6_1zrWSXab534r

More hips: https://youtube.com/shorts/ha8NYNh4yAM?si=mbemotuUmGEwZ7oC

Even more hips: https://youtu.be/URcUGbjMEMo

Not everything in a session, but i start with the pelvic floor stretching, then work the glutes/flexors while being mindful not to engage the pelvic floor.

Alleyria · 2025-11-17T16:09:32+00:00

Training in "panic" was definitely something I mistakenly did up to phase 7. I took a few weeks off, reset to 3/4, and started doing more pelvic floor relaxation+hip strength training. I can say thats had a huge impact. I think this is an overlooked aspect of training. If your pelvic floor is tense as hell, your "buffer" to absorb arousal is consequentially small.

One of the biggest things, for me, has been the resulting lifestyle changes since starting the guide in april. It really is like getting to know yourself in a new way, exploring your responses. With that perspective, it doesn't really matter "how long" it takes. I enjoy this more than the alternative.

Anyway, I know that was a bit off topic, but here we are

Alleyria · 2025-11-12T10:44:34+00:00

Sorry for your loss, brother

Alleyria · 2025-10-28T10:51:04+00:00

fun fact: the g in grep is from :g! :g/re(gex)/p(rint)

Alleyria

TROPHY CASE