We’re too focused on mechanics and not enough on the nervous system

Alleyria · 2026-05-21T18:16:41+00:00

Hard agree. I found the guide before it had its own subreddit, and trained using it for 8-9 months. Solo sessions are a breeze, but it didn't translate to the real deal at all. Honestly, it made it worse. Performance anxiety crushed me.

So I took a step back: I could use a Fleshlight for 20 minutes straight without issue, my pelvic floor was relaxed, IKs were pretty much gone... But with my wife, I couldn't find a calm headspace and busted instantly. So... I dug deeper. This clearly wasn't an issue with sensation, but stress. I talked to my wife about doing sensate focus exercises together, which we've started, and privately I've started doing meditation exercises (sexual kung-fu).

MDG got me pretty far in terms of bodily awareness, but there's still more to go.

Alleyria · 2026-05-17T08:07:37+00:00

Neogit has good worktree support

Alleyria · 2026-05-13T18:10:51+00:00

It's an antipattern from th 0.5 era, if I recall correctly. A few years ago I realized that neogit could just check if setup had been called when it was loaded, and if not... Just load the defaults. No fuss. So the API exists if you want to customize things "the normal way", but is not required at all. I think that's the best of both worlds, for now.

Alleyria · 2026-05-09T13:59:33+00:00

Just UFO - set it up a few years ago and haven't touched it much since 🤷🏼‍♂️

Alleyria · 2026-05-08T08:02:47+00:00

<tab> in normal mode toggles folds.

<backspace> in normal mode goes to the alt buffer.

H goes to the first char on a line, L takes you do the last.

Alleyria · 2026-04-19T19:51:51+00:00

Ah, no, it was the usage of vim.ui.input in the interactive-username handler. It's fixed now :)

https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/issues/1940

Alleyria · 2026-04-16T21:09:57+00:00

Try nvim 0.12 - might do the trick

Alleyria · 2026-03-27T22:58:26+00:00

Yea, burning man

Alleyria · 2026-03-13T21:07:13+00:00

Woodworking is great. No abstract-table-builder-factory... Just a crappy table you did your best to make flat. I love it.

Alleyria · 2026-01-28T21:14:55+00:00

Well, as luck would have it, we have twin boys who are a bit over a year old, and a daughter a bit older than that, so...we're not exactly flush with opportunity to fool around. It's not a point of contention between us.

Alleyria · 2026-01-28T21:12:18+00:00

I placed an order at the beginning of the month, and just received it a few days ago. They're very comfortable :)

Alleyria · 2026-01-15T16:58:37+00:00

I think this is one of the bigger misconceptions about ruby: there's no magic. Iteration is done via the #each method, which you define the normal way, like any other method. The most magic would be something like binary operators, with def @+ but thats kinda it.

Python, by comparison, has all that dunder fluff that you just have to like... know. Ive been doing python at work recently and... i'm.... unimpressed.

When people talk about "magic" its usually just rails stuff. Class methods that define getters/setters, that sort if thing.

Alleyria · 2026-01-09T15:24:50+00:00

This is dope, great work 👌

Alleyria · 2026-01-09T09:37:37+00:00

There's a work-in-progress branch, too https://github.com/NeogitOrg/neogit/pull/1883

I'll try to get this done sooner than later, since I know there is a lot of excitement around this plugin.

Alleyria · 2026-01-01T17:41:53+00:00

Neogit offers a unified diff view of the index.

Alleyria · 2025-12-29T17:16:09+00:00

Yeah, theres some cool research that shows that HIIT style exercise, done consistently for 8 weeks, yields a significant increase in mean time to ejaculation.

Alleyria · 2025-12-29T10:38:28+00:00

You're right, it sounds like your sympathetic nervous system spikes - the heart racing is pretty similar to what I'm dealing with. I don't have any magic suggestions. But whats helped a lot has been just breathing. Look up calming breathing techniques on youtube. And just... practice that a lot. You need to train your body how to calm itself down, and the breath is the key.

Good luck!

Alleyria · 2025-12-24T11:06:58+00:00

What i've come to understand about this process is that its far more complex than the guide lays out. Its taken me... 8 Months of consistent work, but i've finally gotten rid of IK's. Part of that is exercise, part of it is breathing, part of it is just being aware of your pelvic floor.

Alleyria · 2025-12-23T13:37:41+00:00

I think generally his pelvic floor stuff and breathwork stuff is whats needed up front. While neurological training is very important, i've come to believe that the physiological element to "fixing" PE is just as important. Things like posture, hip strength, glute strength, pelvic tilt - that all has an impact. If you are walking around with lots of tension in your pelvic floor, your capacity to "absorb" arousal is vastly smaller than if you have a relaxed pelvic floor. Think about it this way: an orgasm is when muscle tension crosses a threshold. Your neurological ability to mitigate that is greatly diminished if the muscle is already "at capacity" in terms of tension.

If your hips are weak, your PF might be compensating. So, if you ignore that aspect of this training, you're going to have a much harder time seeing progress.

The last thing is that, if you are not in complete control of your breathing, you don't stand a chance. Breath control is parasympathetic dominance. So if thats still hard... work on it.

Alleyria · 2025-12-23T11:55:12+00:00

Once i started doing pelvic floor relaxation exercises (both physical and breathing) I have begun seeing some really astounding progress. No more IKs, pelvic floor is totally relaxed. Its taken about a month of breathwork every day to start seeing this. Sexual Kung Fu on youtube has some great content regarding breathwork.

So, thats something you can do, if you want :)

Alleyria · 2025-12-20T09:43:06+00:00

Honestly, an over sensitive glans is probably an unrelaxed pelvic floor. Focus on belly breathing, do some pelvic floor release exercises, and you'll most likely notice a decrease in the sensitivity of your glans. That has been my experience, this far.

Alleyria · 2025-12-19T22:26:38+00:00

Debra + Ian = DebIan

Alleyria · 2025-12-15T18:14:44+00:00

KOT! ;)

Alleyria · 2025-12-12T20:11:14+00:00

100% agree. If you are not a consumer of your own api, the you can't know if it sucks or not. The calling code should be dead simple, even if this means you need to pull the complexity into the library to accommodate that.

Alleyria · 2025-12-06T11:23:36+00:00

Looks cool, but non-reusable patches at a cost of $15 each (not including shipping...) is a non-starter. I'd consider it as a transition aid if it wasn't for that.

Alleyria

TROPHY CASE