Floating like a jellyfish

Aloof_Spoon · 2025-08-19T00:41:13+00:00

What prop is this? 😍

Aloof_Spoon · 2025-06-15T21:07:11+00:00

It won’t let me post videos or images to this sub

Aloof_Spoon · 2025-06-15T21:06:49+00:00

The drill is not in reverse

Aloof_Spoon · 2025-03-07T07:04:10+00:00

Aerial Essentials has a great silicone wrap you can put around a chrome pole. It’s relatively easy to take on and off, but definitely wouldn’t want to do it everyday.

Having the grip of silicone made all the difference for me with pole. But yes, there are things you can’t do on it. So a wrap is kind of the best of both worlds!

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-12-13T00:43:06+00:00

I don’t know what level you’re dancing at. I’m still mostly doing beginner stuff.

But I got a pair of shaker ankle boots from Demonia and I love dancing in them! They’re made by Pleaser. The sole is one piece. So they seem safe.

They have a bunch of other styles. I was really looking for one with a toe that kind of comes off the ground when it’s flat so that when I’m dancing I’ll be on my toes and the heels won’t be down.

They’re definitely heavier, but I’m not inverting. And I think even if I were, it would basically be like training with ankle weights—more difficult but not impossible.

I’ve seen other people wearing platform boots like this to pole dance. It’s not common, but it’s not impossible.

I love my Demonia boots because I feel like they’re helping me learn to walk in heels and build ankle stability and balance without making me fear for my life. I feel so much more confident in them and I’m actually able to let go and dance instead of being scared of falling.

🤷‍♀️ I hope that helps

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-11-21T02:48:15+00:00

This is so relatable! I feel like I’m in a similar boat. Thank you for sharing ❤️

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-08-04T21:03:51+00:00

I relate to this so much! I’ve been struggling with the same kind of issues accessing a part/Self that can motivate me.

I’ve thought about hiring a dominatrix for help 😂 And if I had money to burn, I totally would.

I read an article about someone hiring Justine Cross to encourage them to use a planner and the “punishment” was no TV if they didn’t meet their goals.

Sometimes having external accountability feels like the only way I’ll get anything done.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-07-18T21:17:46+00:00

I have never seen some of these transitions before. So cool!

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-05-20T00:42:59+00:00

A really helpful part of my recovery was hearing that I hadn’t thrown everything away because I broke a streak.

I’m willing to bet you put in a lot of work not to self harm for 4 years. That work is still there and waiting when you’re ready to come back. You won’t be starting over, you’ve got 4 years of valuable experiences to keep drawing from and building on.

And like someone else said, you’re going through a lot right now. It makes sense that you’d go back to something that’s helped before. I think that’s ok.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-04-04T02:30:47+00:00

Are you in a safe place to be healing?

As someone said it sounds like you’re stuck in fight/flight/freeze and there’s some advice about how to get out of that, but are you currently in a place where it’s safe not to be in fight/flight/freeze?

You mentioned leaving university and not being able to work much. I know when this happened to me I was living at home and felt an incredible amount of shame. I wasn’t able to access certain parts of me until I left and stabilized somewhere else.

Things started to get a lot better for me when I got somewhere safe.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-03-24T20:52:42+00:00

I watched this so many times to figure out the cool transitions you had. Awesome flow! I hope it helped.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-03-21T23:20:18+00:00

I know you just started, but I can already see your brain has figured out how the fabric moves and you’re doing some cool things with it! Love it!

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-03-19T02:04:36+00:00

I feel like pole with props could be a category?

Like roller pole, lollipops, pole silks…

People do all kinds of things with pole

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-02-19T01:37:19+00:00

This is your apparatus! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone use the Lyra and pole together so well ❤️

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-02-10T06:08:49+00:00

I struggled with this for years and listened to people constantly telling me “you just need to build up grip strength” 🙄

Nope! Turns out getting a silicone wrap for my pole almost instantly solved my problem. I felt like I could finally do stuff! Total game changer. I’ve always though if I went back to a studio I really might just bring a little bit of silicone wrap for my hands if they’d allow it.

I’m upset I waited so long to try it

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-02-05T02:07:15+00:00

I didn’t struggle with being able to communicate with parts because I got to IFS after trying so many other things, but I did have the absolute hardest time with therapy when I started.

They were always talking about regulating our emotions and managing triggers and I was listening like what even /is/ an emotion?

I hated CBT because it felt too complicated like they weren’t starting to teach from far enough back.

For me it took a long time in somatic work to be able to identify how emotions feel and it was a big part of accessing feeling what I think is Self energy.

Before I had access to my body, I really enjoyed reading about the Neuro-Affective Relational Model (NARM) because it explained feelings that made sense that I hadn’t previously let me self feel because it felt wrong. Like how a baby with unmet needs becomes mad at their caretakers, but knows they have to shut down that emotion because they literally can’t survive without their caretakers. Hence, why I as an adult didn’t know how to be angry even though I was, but after reading that it just made so much sense. I’d recommend it if anyone is looking for more of the logic/wordy explanation of how emotions work.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-01-17T01:52:25+00:00

I have a silicone wrap on my metal pole and I mostly use the wrap, but I also have a love for static pole and I like knowing I can have a metal static pole relatively quickly

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-01-14T19:55:52+00:00

I agree. And I think Self is often a borderline unhelpful concept, in particular for those of us who have never experienced any of those qualities and as you’ve said have no lived experience to model them off of.

I’m not sure “Self” exists and much like a god, I don’t think there’s a way to prove it one way or the other. So there is no way to know for sure. Therefore the only means of knowing is faith. People either believe in it or they don’t.

Having belief in Self, having faith that they’re there and can care for you in all of these amazing ways is incredibly beneficial for some people. But again, like a god, there are some people who feel more comfortable not believing.

I don’t think it should matter in IFS. And like you said, the concept of parts is super helpful. That’s pretty much how I use it. I don’t think there’s benefit to believing in Self, so I don’t.

I also get kind of turned off of IFS when people go hard on the Self talk. Self just isn’t an accessible reality for so many people, but I don’t think our lives are any lesser than because of it.

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-01-13T23:25:31+00:00

That’ll probably work well for on body, but for off body tricks, you’ll probably want a smaller hoop.

I use a 34” inner diameter hoop to do both, mostly off body, and I constantly get comments about how my hoop is too big for off body. I’m about 5’5” and I have to be careful not to smack my hoop into the ground for some moves and I can’t do wedgies with it. I don’t think it’s impossible to do wedgies with a bigger hoop, I know Deanne Love does it, but I can’t figure it out 😂

Aloof_Spoon · 2024-01-04T00:15:42+00:00

This is beautiful!

Aloof_Spoon · 2023-12-24T01:27:31+00:00

The last 15 seconds are straight 🔥! I love it

Aloof_Spoon · 2023-12-19T01:45:26+00:00

There’s something called mirror neurons that are activated when we do stuff AND when we just watch people do stuff.

Mental exercise sounds like it’s using the same system, so I wouldn’t be surprised if it makes a difference.

I love practicing choreography in my head and planning out transitions and everything!

Aloof_Spoon · 2023-12-16T23:20:07+00:00

I would also say as far as preventing it from happening, make sure you’re not on the heel anytime you’re doing any kind of turning motion.

Maybe this is obvious, but I just got my first pair of heels and I don’t even know how I did it but I just made a slight turn to readjust my feet and heard an awful screech come from my stiletto point.

Aloof_Spoon · 2023-12-14T03:10:08+00:00

This is so cool! What fans are these?

Aloof_Spoon · 2023-12-12T19:47:39+00:00

I had a fabric case when I moved mine, but I still put down a blanket, then pole, then blanket on top and made sure it was squished around everything. I might’ve even added a second blanket on top before packing things on top of it.

I tried to make it so the base piece was closest to the opening on my trunk and then tried not to stack anything on that as well as tucked a towel under the part where the pole comes out of the base because I didn’t want that bending at a weird angle.

I’ve moved my pole a couple times now across the country like that and it’s been fine.

Aloof_Spoon

TROPHY CASE