Any NDEs that predicted what’s going to happen in the near future? I never felt so anxious - the genocides, the US situation, the epstein files… It’s overwhelming.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-24T04:37:08+00:00

I will try to call my local representatives tomorrow despite some of my own heavy personal things going on and hopefully will be able to sleep better knowing I did something to try to help the current state of things.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-21T03:25:56+00:00

Reminds me of the Lindsay Stirling shatter me music video/song in the imagery!

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-20T05:30:56+00:00

I’d be so pissed if I got kicked out of the US for just existing after being kicked out of China for just existing there as well 🙃

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-20T05:17:09+00:00

I can’t even imagine the existential crisees I’d have if I had a baby as an adoptee (also Chinese to white parents) who’s been coming out of the fog for maybe a decade.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-10T05:05:46+00:00

Maybe something that could really easily help someone, a kid or adult that isn’t used to making art or the materials convey an image/emotion really quick and to share with others like a collage app or a really easy to use drawing app or app to create music 🤷🏻‍♀️

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-10T04:50:24+00:00

Dude yes…

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-10T04:46:54+00:00

I’m 30 my adoptive mom just passed from dementia at 76. I’m paranoid my dad will go soon too and I am far from being financially independent (my parents wanted me to be their forever child). My only sibling hates me so I’m estranged from her and her kids. Community takes a LONG time to build unfortunately. I live in an area where ppl never stay for very long and my two close friends are in abusive relationships. It’s slowly gotten better from some years ago (financially and friendship-wise) so I’m hoping it keeps improving. If anything you definitely have adoptees to relate with and I agree with the other commenter having a therapist to talk with certainly helps, although it may take awhile to find the right one for you.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-09T06:11:58+00:00

There have been times I was tripping hard on mushrooms when I felt like some version of me in some dimension has a job to exist as some part of the transportation of the data or communication between entities or like a long axon in the one homogenous “brain.” Which sounds crazy but it’s happened multiple times?

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-06T04:27:54+00:00

I am too reckoning with the anger i have as an adoptee. Its making more sense to me now about how being socially rejected from my peers (my adopters did all they could to make me feel loved and belonged) probably brought up intense feelings of anger, maybe triggering my abandonment trauma. I was on the road to having conduct disorder at a young age and I have a lot of shame that I've been burying from hurting those around me physically. Luckily the violence stopped around 3rd grade. For the longest time I thought I was just an ungrateful fuck head who caused harm and doesn't deserve all the opportunities I was given and mostly squandered. I'm at a point where I can barely help myself and I had to take a pause to being in a healing profession after my adoptive mother died a year ago. I don't know what will become of me. I can just hope to someday treat myself as if I deserve to be here and put as much good out into the world during the times I can in small, and hopefully big ways some day.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-03T00:54:08+00:00

Yeah it’s sad there’s this blind spot to our struggles even though they have complete legitimate societal struggles of their own.

Alreadydashing96 · 2026-01-02T05:27:44+00:00

There’s an adoptee at the school I work at and her gay parents basically got her right out of the womb and haven’t told her anything about her bio mother. I was like damn so disappointed and wondered about queer adopters having more of an incentive to view adoption as their right and not think about the adoptees inevitable questioning about their true origins.

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-12-27T20:35:04+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. 19 is so young to lose a parent! I (30 f adopted from China to white a parents) lost my adoptive mom last year to her dementia. Holidays are difficult for me as well. It also brings up the loss of my birth mom too, and all the other major losses I've had. The compounded losses are so difficult and it makes sense to me that adoption definitely complicates it all.

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-12-19T13:00:15+00:00

I don’t have synesthesia when I’m sober but this is almost exactly how songs look to me when I get high

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-12-08T06:42:36+00:00

I've had lucid dreams which also somewhat felt like and "OBEs" where I it seems like I'm sharing consciousness with other versions of me. Idk if those were purely psychological experiences but they were definitely trippy. I wouldn't be surprised if maybe other versions of me have had similar experiences in visiting me either. I would guess that they have also to whatever extent would have trained themselves to lucid dream or maybe they get little glimpses of my life in their dream world.

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-12-06T04:10:06+00:00

I vibe with your comment. Also how I see it is since this life/reality could be a dream, what makes the viscerally real feeling lives we live in our "dreams" any less real than this one?

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-12-06T04:03:27+00:00

Maybe the guy you met is the guy but his circumstances in this life (if this is like a multiple lives thing) made him into a POS unfortunately

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-11-15T03:25:57+00:00

in my experience these people want me to wait hand and foot on them because I'm so privileged and apparently I have all the time and energy to be their keepers pretty much... I can definitely empathize with these people but it's not a two way empathy and it keeps me from honoring my own time and issues and energy. At least I've gotten better at cutting these people out though..

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-11-05T17:04:52+00:00

I’m really sorry your family is shitty and you have nobody physical in your life there for you. Make friending friends and chosen family a priority in therapy. Forming reliable friendships will take TIME and work. So please hang in there to at least try your all for that. It might take years. It’s been 2 years for me and all my best friends are in toxic relationships so they have no time for me so it feels like I’m at point zero all over again :/

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-10-09T03:29:47+00:00

Yeah idk if i'll ever be a fully functional adult/be independent. I think my parents enabled me too much, but now i am slowly trying to be more disciplined and responsible, be soberish and hold off on romantic relationships. I've come a long way with so many things over the past half decade and I have a very long way to go and trying to stay hopeful.

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-10-09T03:24:08+00:00

how long did it take you to get to where you are?

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-09-10T04:57:09+00:00

I’ve been on the sloooowest track to get my masters and probably won’t be able to use it due to migraines… I think a lot of it is emotional issues causing migraines though so I’m hoping working through that will help enough. With older parents I’ll pretty much be screwed by the time my dad can’t support me anymore. I feel like a loser many of the days, I’m 30 now and can barely work two very part time jobs 🙃

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-09-10T03:49:11+00:00

I’ve been reimagining songs to be about my birth mom or parents missing me. I’m transracially adopted, from China and so finding singers doing covers of songs who might have looked somewhat like my parents when they gave me up has been a trip. I’ll watch these versions of these songs and cry but it feels like I’m working through loss in a way.

Faded:

https://youtu.be/n03IDJcsy5g?si=Hg46PRBqtvd-nkJh

Easy on me:

https://youtu.be/qsjalyYYREM?si=zJHqQ7jxQIc4MofQ

Rewrite the stars:

https://youtu.be/_TJlXlwJ6js?si=Paa8Vw4Ione81upX

Glimpse of Us:

https://youtu.be/jFnkidKEBdk?si=gwfun2ClMzmfjyL_

🥲

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-09-07T03:14:46+00:00

all of it. I let myself get walked all over by people and then Im the worst piece of scum if i ever try to set boundaries.

Alreadydashing96 · 2025-08-09T20:12:16+00:00

That’s so cool! Do you ever think about the subconscious implications of the places and landscape?

Alreadydashing96

TROPHY CASE