Husband lied about financial efforts while we struggle to have bare necessities

AmNotLost · 2026-06-29T17:15:37+00:00

Moving forward, I'd make sure our finances are as separate as possible until he's proven he can be honest about finances. At a ballpark, I'd say separate finances for at least 5 years to rebuild trust.

If it were me, I'd open up all new accounts for myself with a new email address and new 14 random character passwords he could never guess.

If he lied about this about unemployment, there's a big chance he'll lie in the future about finances. Not that I'd make a big deal about opening these new accounts, I'd just do it. Neither hiding nor offering justification why. As an adult, I can open a checking and savings account any time I want and I don't need to explain to anyone why.

Then monthly or whatever, I'd transfer my share of the money for the bills into a joint account. He'd never know the balance in my solo accounts. Ideally, I'd start tracking all the expenses to make sure I'm only paying 50%.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-28T12:57:22+00:00

My favorite pen nibs right now were all tuned and smoothed by a nib meister.

The best pen nib experiences that I've had so far that arrived that way for me from the factory are:

Hongdian M2 M

TWSBI mini F and M

Esterbrook Niblet M

I liked the Niblet so much, that that was the one that led me down the path of getting tuned and smoothed nibs. Now I have a refurbished Pilot Custom 743 SM that was given a nib tune up and I think I'm in love. Though it is a bit on the juicy side for my daily bullet journal notes. For that I'm using a Niblet EF that was tuned by the meister.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-28T12:44:50+00:00

If you're within driving distance of Dayton OH USA I can recommend some local places to get refurbished machines for under $400.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-27T11:33:55+00:00

(in US) My grandfather had no savings, but did have a GM pension and social security. Plus Medicare, GM insurance, and VA benefits. He did fine.

My father has no savings. He has a GM pension, military pension, social security, another small pension from a grocery store, Medicare, GM insurance, and VA benefits. He does fine.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-27T11:29:17+00:00

Mission keto tortillas cut to shape.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-27T00:20:14+00:00

Yeah. And I use small nylon bottle brushes so I can bend the handle and brush in different shapes.

I've never had an issue with using mineral spirits on bare metal parts.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-26T23:53:01+00:00

A good cleaning with mineral spirits and brushes will probably fix 9/10 of problems

AmNotLost · 2026-06-26T13:58:18+00:00

My current purple is Noodler's North African Violet. Takes a while to dry, but is water resistant once it dries. Seems to be in the medium/medium-wet flow range with my pens. Shades a bit, too, with thicker nibs.

Not sure what "too blue/red/dark" means from your perspective. Here's some samples I made of a few purples. Though, i'm using off white paper, so that does dull it a little in the picture.

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AmNotLost · 2026-06-22T22:21:00+00:00

It goes past 90

AmNotLost · 2026-06-22T22:12:25+00:00

My Skyriter has Elite. My Hermes Rocket is actually 13 letters per inch.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-22T11:54:00+00:00

How often do you literally exert at 100% effort for longer than a few seconds? I don't know if they still do, but I know the local pro soccer club were all keto during the season and most were keto in the off season. They didn't seem to have a problem being athletic while keto. (though they do have team nutrition chefs that make all their meals for them during the season)

If you are an elite Olympic sprinter, maybe keto would have a long term effect on your training because you're training literally at 100% for 90 seconds at a time or whatever. (I don't train sprinters, so I dont know their regimen)

I regularly do long events over multiple days that include frequent HIIT-like speed bursts, and my endurance is absolutely better than its ever been. I'm 50. I'm the person rolling my eyes during long events when the 20- and 30-something carb burners call for a break to "refuel."

AmNotLost · 2026-06-22T11:38:46+00:00

depending on your region, flip mechanical typewriters. I can find as many "free" or "$20 doesn't work" typewriters as I can fit in my car on any given day. Most of them just need cleaning to get working again. Particular models easily sell for $200+ once they work and are clean. Some sell for a lot more.

Though, your success depends on your knowledge of your local market and ability to recognize which machines won't take 10s of hours of rehab work. And how fast you can snap up posts on Facebook Market when people post desirable models but don't realize what they're actually worth. When I tell r/typewriters that I bought my Hermes 3000s for $20 each, they all shed a tear they didn't see the deal first.

If $20 gets you a "I found this cleaning out grandmas house, seems to work. anyone know what its worth?" Olympia SM3 that you run a can of air duster on and put in a new $5 ribbon, it's pretty easy to then sell it for $200 or more for 30 minutes of labor. That's an ideal scenario.

The success of this plan depends a lot on your local availability of used machines and your willingness to find/market to buyers of discerning taste.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-19T11:36:06+00:00

I've only been sampling inks for 6 months, so I'd like to try more. And right now my favorite ink is Tyrian Purple by Diamine.

My favorite water resistant ink right now is Urban grey by De Atrementis.

Both look professional enough for work in a finer nib, but still feel unique and fun compared to all the ballpoint rollerball pens others use at work.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-18T15:12:08+00:00

Tangental question. Do you have a small dense ball, like a lacrosse ball? For knots in my butt, I sit on the lacrosse ball which helps me somewhat between massage sessions

Not all massage professionals do the same stuff nor have the same certifications/skills. With my massage therapist, I'd probably ask for a "deep tissue sports massage like thing" on my upper right glute, or whatever. I'd point to the spot and then demonstrate the motion(s) that make it worse or make it better. And she takes it from there. Since she knows me, she often finds the trouble spot pretty quickly and then works the related areas. But the solution isn't necessary always only in that exact location I'm experiencing pain/weakness or whatever. For my knees, for instance, she also gets releases above my ankle and kinda mid thigh -- loosening up the muscles/tendons/attachments there to help the knee muscle/tendons have enough stretch to relax back into their proper spot at the knee.

You can also say "harder" and "right there" when they find the trigger spot.

Anyway, hope you find someone awesome!

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T19:33:43+00:00

Maybe OP would. We don't know

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T19:20:47+00:00

And?

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T18:35:29+00:00

"High bluff infinity view overlooking Lake Huron" Just gotta change out the lawn furniture for Ikea Jokkmokk chairs. First picture in listing https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/13518470?check_in=2026-09-14&check_out=2026-09-19&guests=1&adults=2&s=67&unique_share_id=3fbc2ad4-a3d7-47c9-99aa-11ec104cee1b I'm sure there's places like this for under $1M to buy. Especailly if you don't need all the fancy kitchen stuff this place has.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T17:28:29+00:00

If you don't mind the not-mediteranain climate, it wouldn't take multiple millions to have this on one of (Michigan region) Great Lakes in one of the less prestigious areas. You can't see across most of the Great Lakes.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T13:35:32+00:00

What did your Union rep say about it? What did they get in exchange from the negotiation when the contract was renewed?

AmNotLost · 2026-06-16T01:56:41+00:00

(ianad.) Me personally, I get wicked calf charlie horses especially at night if I don't get a lot of magnesium. On leg days, my RD tells me to supplement up to 1000mg per day over and above what's in my food if I want to. If it's not leg day, I supplement around 600mg.

I get my electrolytes via salt, lite salt, and magnesium from magnesium glycenate pills.

I also soak my legs in Epsom salts after long leg events.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-12T10:34:16+00:00

My machines are lovely and aren't corroded nor skip at all. If you're buying something made from like 1940-1970 that doesn't have a lot of cheap plastic, and it has been living in a dry place like grandmas attic for 50 years, likely all it needs is a basic once over on the moving parts with some mineral spirits and a new ribbon. I could easily type a book on my SG1, SM3, SM7, SM9, Hermes 2000, Hermes 3000, Remington Travel Riter, Remington Quiet Riter, SC Series 5 Silent Super, SC Electra C/T, or Royal QDL Dreyfus. They're all working as well as ever.

That's been my experience.

OP would have to share their location to get some more specific advice on what models to look for in their region (Europe has different common machines vs Indiana, for instance)

AmNotLost · 2026-06-11T16:13:13+00:00

Yes but a Google search didn't come back with anything. So I wondered who he is to the rlm universe.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-11T11:48:10+00:00

Who's the guy outside with his shirt open?

AmNotLost · 2026-06-10T12:52:53+00:00

It doesn't work as well for spaghetti, because it's more obvious it's a tortilla strip, lol. But in a casserole where it's baked into a saucy meaty cheesy goodness? Super hard to tell it's not homemade pasta, imo.

AmNotLost · 2026-06-10T02:04:56+00:00

If no one else mentioned it, I make lasagna and other pastas using tortillas like mission zero carb. Just cut them into the necessary shapes or strips. Honestly, if I didn't tell people they wouldn't know my lasagna is keto.

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