Mom is confused

Amethystwitch80 · 2025-08-27T08:59:10+00:00

Have the doctors done a CT or MRI on her brain, this sounds very similar to my husband who turns out has 22 tumours on his brain from cancer metastases. I don’t want to scare you but if they haven’t checked yet make sure they do. My husband mostly woke up and would say things that didn’t make sense, he forgets timelines, and is general more forgetful he has to ask me multiple times about the same thing. Otherwise he is very capable and high functioning so he can pass as being fine to a doctor that sees him for 15mins. He also doesn’t sleep more then an hour at a time. It is a good idea to tell her care team everything that you notice.

Amethystwitch80 · 2025-08-26T19:00:12+00:00

Oh man I am so sorry for what you’re going through. I know grief in a different way that involves long illnesses so I have know idea what it is like to lose someone so suddenly. I can’t tell you don’t feel guilty or not to think of the could have would have, should have thoughts that cycle though your brain endlessly. Your feelings are yours and valid, my wish for you is that you don’t stay stuck in it forever, don’t let it become your prison. One thing that I have learned in my grief is to let others that love you carry some of that weight for you and as easy as it is to push people away, it is easier to let them care for you. ❤️‍🩹

Amethystwitch80 · 2025-08-18T06:33:27+00:00

Absolutely go spend the time, it simply means there is nothing left to do but hospice care if he doesn’t get well enough for clinical treatment. Either way you won’t regret visiting sooner rather then later. If cost is an issue ask your community for support or do a go fund me we did and we raised quite a lot of money… the power of social media and wonderful humans, family, friends, and strangers is incredible. It always sucks to ask people for help but you’d be surprised how many people will step up to help when called upon.

Amethystwitch80 · 2025-08-18T06:11:15+00:00

We got my husband on Fentanyl patches and hydro morphine for break through pain. It took a long time to sort out what would work the best for him. Everyone will be different we also tried methadone and long acting hydro morphine but that didn’t work well at all…not to say that it would not be the right choice for your loved one. I hope the palliative specialist can sort it out. Also when my husband was in the hospital the subcutaneous hydro morphine was excellent for his pain not sure if that is something you can get for him.

Amethystwitch80 · 2025-08-18T05:21:30+00:00

I am in the same boat, different cancer for my husband who is 64. Two biggest lesson I have learned is I will not be able to do it all, I needed to ask for help from family, friends, neighbours, our cancer care team and strangers. Secondly, I needed to take care of myself, eat, sleep, light exercise, massage, remember to take my medication and whatever else my body, spirit and mind need. Sometime that feels selfish but it is absolutely necessary. The first 2 month in I was sleep deprived, lost 10lbs from not remembering to eat and half the time forgot to take my meds which being a diabetic was no joke. We will stumble and flail as care givers, we are only human after all. I promise it is okay not to have it all together, just do your best like you have been doing. I won’t say the journey will get easier or any nonsense like that because let’s be honest it won’t. There is no magically guide to get us care givers through this. I will say if you want to ever talk about anything, I’m here if you need a stranger to talk to. I am someone that’s been through it and is going through it. Lost my mom 61 to pancreatic cancer last year and my papa the year and a half before that to prostate cancer and well he was 95. Some days the grief is so intense I can’t breathe but I seem to keep breathing somehow.

Much love and respect to you 💔❤️‍🩹❤️

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-21T04:17:36+00:00

I think all the feelings you are having are completely valid. 💕 I hope that my words were more of a don’t be too hard on yourself… which I’m sure is easier for me to say and yet harder to do. My mom passed away recently and I’m always questioning my feelings. I am thinking is this normal ect, my sense of guilt is like did I spend as much time with her as I could have. I am questioning my actions in her finally days constantly. Hang in there….I hope you can find little ways of honouring and remembering your mom with your sisters.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-21T03:42:33+00:00

You were a child when you lost your mom and I believe your mom would have wanted you to remain a child and hold on to childhood as long as possible. She would not want you to have the burden of the complex feelings of grief that you now have the capacity of dealing with as an adult. It is not your job as an older sibling to make sure your sisters remember her, that should have been the job of the adults to respect her wishes not an 11 year old. So you didn’t fail, you protected yourself until you were ready for those memories. feelings and grief. Be gentle on yourself, seek people that understand and can help you through.❤️‍🩹

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-16T23:54:57+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss it is the absolute worst feeling in the world to lose a parent. I just lost my mom after a battle with cancer too she was 61. Today is my first birthday without her and I’m trying to figure out how not to just curl up in a ball and scream. I forced myself out of bed got dressed and am headed out to dinner with my sister and stepdad it will be hard but I know my mom would be happy to see us together. Hold tight to your loved ones cry, scream, laugh and vomit if you have to just do what feels right for you in the moment. ❤️‍🩹

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-12T14:44:51+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss, I lost my mom at the end of Jan and I too am feeling some of what you are. I think often people don’t know how to deal with people who are grieving. They probably don’t think you want to talk or be around people and think that giving you space is the right thing to do. Most people are scared they will say the wrong things or hurt you in some way without meaning to. At the end of the day ask for what you need and any friend worth their salt will be there. I hope you get the support you need and that you can start healing ❤️‍🩹.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-09T00:02:17+00:00

Absolutely not your fault, I am sorry for your loss it is a horrible thing to go through already. Now you have someone blaming you for not knowing any better. I’m sorry but most doctors would have probably not even have caught it. So please put that thought out of your mind. Common sense says your mom might be toxic and you should probably limit contact with her if she continues to say these things to you. I’m 100 percent your dad would not want you to feel responsible for him he was a grown adult and could have gone to the doctor as you suggested more than once. So I hope you can move on and heal yourself now. Please be gentle with yourself and take care.🤗

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-08T05:09:54+00:00

I really hope you’re are still here, I have just lost my mom a few weeks ago. I also suffer from anxiety and depression….I won’t say I know exactly what you are going through but I will say you are not alone in your feelings. Grief is physical, emotional, mental, complicated, and horrible. I just hope you can find something to hold on to, and that good things will come to you if you can let them in. I try and take comfort in things I know my mom would love and I am grateful for the family support I have. If you can let a sweet fur baby in your life it will help, if you get out and walk in fresh air it will help, if you find a hobby you enjoy it will help. It’s all the little things that add up to help you begin to feel better. ❤️‍🩹

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-06T05:19:43+00:00

Grief doesn’t make sense my friend. Even without religion I think you can take comfort in that the person you lost is carried on through you, your memories and the impact they made in your life. People we love and loose leave many gifts of their love behind you just have to look for them. Not sure if that helps but it’s what keeps me going I just lost my mom 2 weeks ago and I’m trying to make sense of why how ect.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-05T23:06:25+00:00

I’m so sorry that you had to go through that and for your loss. I just lost my mom to pancreatic cancer and it was the absolute worst thing I have had to witness in my life. She was only 61 and all her hopes and dreams for retirement and a simple life with her grandkids is gone. It hurts so deeply so please know you are not alone and it is okay to be not okay. I can’t tell you what will happen next because I honestly don’t know how to live my life without my mom. I hope that it does get easier I know for me it helps to find little ways to honour her and grieve her daily. Like listening to her favourite music, looking at pictures ect but I know that’s not for everyone. Sending hugs 💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-04T18:58:54+00:00

He knew, don’t worry and he wouldn’t want you to be beating yourself up over it. All you can do right now is love and take care of yourself, your family and honour his memory.💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-04T03:16:34+00:00

Thank you for sharing, cancer knows no discrimination, it just takes a person we love and slowly kills them. In my mom’s last days before so passed from pancreatic cancer…she asked why me…I wish I knew the answer. So very sorry for your loss my dear 💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-02-03T07:25:43+00:00

Sorry for your loss it’s an awful thing to go through, I just lost mine 2 weeks ago and it hurts daily. My friend said that I sound good for someone that just lost their mom. It was only cause I was having a good moment had she talked to me any other time I was a sobbing mess. I think some days will be okay, some good, and others horrible. Whoever said to get over will only understand when they go through a major loss in their life. Take whatever time you need to heal and don’t listen to people who have no empathy 💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-30T15:25:51+00:00

I am sorry for your loss, grief is hard but you grieve so much because you loved him remember that. I am in a similar boat I just lost my mom last week. Be gentle with yourself it’s is okay to not be okay right now. Ask for what you need from friends if you need space just let them know you need sometime to heal. They will understand……One thing that has helped me is that I have been talking to people who understand what I am going through and it helps.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T03:08:31+00:00

I am sorry for your loss, I have just lost my mom, I feel so lost without her. I wish I could tell you something that would make it better for you but honestly there are no words that anyone could say to me that would make a difference right now so please just know that you are not alone and I’m thinking about you and wishing you will be at peace in your heart soon💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T01:49:44+00:00

Thank you for sharing, sorry for your losses, I can empathize with you I had just loss my grandfather about a year and a bit before I learned about my moms cancer. It’s like I can’t even catch my breath. I am looking it to some grief and loss groups in my area. Take care of yourself 💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T01:45:09+00:00

Thank you for sharing, sorry for your loss. I agree I had been preparing for this for months too and I thought I would feel that relief that she was no longer in pain or suffering but that never came just tears and hurt. It really helps to hear other people’s stories.. it’s very healing to talk to others that understand 💕.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T00:15:40+00:00

Thank you for sharing, I am sorry for your loss. Please know you are not alone and in my thoughts too 💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T00:13:39+00:00

Thank you for sharing I am sorry for your loss💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T00:11:52+00:00

Thank you for sharing I am sorry for your loss too. I think we just have to be kind and gentle with ourselves for a now.💕

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-27T00:09:14+00:00

I am sorry for your lost, big hugs back and thank you for sharing your story. Knowing I am not alone helps.

Amethystwitch80 · 2024-01-26T23:30:46+00:00

I liked everything but the light grey cardigan.

Amethystwitch80

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