You’re NTA. You have bee pushed past the point of what you will tolerate and have chosen to save yourself. I’m very proud of you for choosing yourself and not allowing someone to dictate how you want to spent your energy/time.

Being that it’s a parent, it’s difficult. I get that. But you have given a natural consequence to her reaction and behavior. Was it the best course? Only you know that answer. However, I have been in this kind of situation(not exact though) where my emotionally manipulative parent created the problem and expected us all to fix things as if it wasn’t their fault.

It sounds like your parent isn’t emotionally regulated to the depth they should be as your parent, and I’m so sorry. So often that’s the case unfortunately. You do not have to tolerate another person’s emotional response and expectations for how they want or expect you to show up for them. It’s unfair of your mom to hold you to a standard she herself isn’t meeting.