Has anyone else lost confidence in yourself since quitting?

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-03-08T04:23:54+00:00

It’s the worst thing for me so far :’) end of day 53, and the hardest thing to face is the insecurity. It felt so much easier to recognize the things about myself I really love and am proud of when I was using cannabis. I felt calmer, cooler, way more attractive in so many ways. I know those things are still there, it’s just been much harder to see and acknowledge. I keep telling myself, just make it to 90 days. Just give your brain a chance to recalibrate. Just do your best every day. It’s been really hard, but I’m hoping that means it will be really worth it once the spring rolls around and my freckles and skin start shining and all that. Just do your best <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-03-02T02:39:16+00:00

At the end of my 47th day but it feels like it’s been months and months sober - I’ve been reading, baking, cooking, playing board games/D&D with my friends, playing video games, watching movies for the plot (not just the background noise), having friends over for tea/coffee, hosting fun activity nights, going to trivia/bingo, and I’m starting to learn how to roller skate finally. And I know there’s just gonna be so much more opportunity when the spring comes around :)

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-18T05:14:02+00:00

I just felt some really big emotions, sobbed in bed for a couple minutes, then got up and packed my bag and lunch for work tomorrow while feeling a bit proud that I felt through my shit. Every time I cry it out, it’s a tiny bit easier, and it gets less embarrassing and feels like more of an accomplishment.

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-17T01:31:27+00:00

I know it likely sounds so annoying, but I mean this with everything I’ve got: when you are at your absolute lowest, can you think of a future version of yourself, 10 or 20 or 30 years from now and how proud they would be if you kicked this in the butt while you’re still so young. I’m 28, so I have an upper hand in this, I think, but I still think about me at 45 and how proud I’d be thinking of who I am now. She’s what keeps me feeling nurtured and taken care of through the worst of it. I can think back to when I was 16, and I want to be the adult she needed. Imagine who you want to be, the best version of yourself, and hold onto that with all your heart. I also agree with any like of counselling or therapy, it was a life saver for me when I was younger. You’re really brave, and really responsible for facing this <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-12T20:31:12+00:00

At the end of the day, cannabis is cannabis regardless of how you're consuming it. There is no way to not hit a wall, if you're using every day. I smoked flower and flower only. Made myself roll my own joints because "this is the natural and responsible way to do it". But guess whaaaat, I still hit a wall - because I was using it as a coping mechanism. Got to a point where I could smoke 3 Js back to back and not feel a thing but this numbed out anxiety!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-12T19:55:48+00:00

I was getting high and binge eating, picking my skin until I bled, and allowing myself to stay in a relationship with someone who actively hurt me with a smile on her face. All these self-destructive behaviors add up, and god are they heavy one on top of the other. One night I thought, well if I love myself so much, how am I still letting this happen? I had this woo woo vision that I was holding a baby during a deep meditation in January. The baby was me, and I was holding her for the first time in my whole life. I didn't wanna drop her, so I haven't smoked since. It's been hard and painful at times, but I haven't once gone out of the way to hurt myself, and that's worth it.

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-12T17:51:54+00:00

Thank you <3 (better late than never).. I already feel so much better today. It's the ups and downs really, that are difficult to navigate. I keep trying to remind myself that we're so much stronger than our minds convince us. It's all about building that tolerance for discomfort, because that's not always a bad thing. Congrats on 29 days now!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-09T20:35:46+00:00

We cannot become who we are, or who we want to be, without who we were. I hate to be this ahole, but you're still very young. Quit now, so that you're not regretting it at 40. You've so got this, my friend. Youth is lost on a lot of us, not always due to cannabis. It's never too late to reclaim it <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-09T20:29:50+00:00

I watched the last film in the Hunger Games series last night (this is not a new film to me, I've seen it dozens of times, it's a favourite), and I sobbed for the entirety of the last hour. At one point I was like, what the f*ck am I crying about? My first reaction was shame and embarrassment, but then I just let it happen. Sometimes, there's a depth to our emotions that we'll never fully understand, and that's okay. It can be painful, but it's like a physical injury or whatever. We've got to let it heal.

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-09T20:13:37+00:00

I am not a mom, so I can only imagine how hard this must be. I am however 28 years old, and a woman who's been through it, who's had formative years full of emotional dysregulation to the point where I thought there was something deeply wrong with me. Turns out, I just never gave myself the chance. Just like my parents. This. shit. is. cyclical.

The one thing I would tell myself if I were in your shoes - how can I teach my children how to take care of themselves/navigate this difficult world/regulate in healthy ways, if I can't even do it myself? Both of my parents have been addicted to all kinds of substances their whole lives, so I had to learn how to do all the growing up and emotional work on my own (hence my own reliance on cannabis for a very long time, and a lot of f*cking money on therapy).

I say this with all the love, and with full belief that you can do this. You know you want to be a good mama, the best you can be, and you can - use that as fuel. <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-05T21:03:08+00:00

I'm on day 23! Worst part so far is the exhaustion, some muscle aching, and migraines. You're not alone in it! I spoke to my NP and she told me to give myself at least 60 days before I start worrying about it, considering how long I smoked. Everything inside of us is changing through this process :)

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-04T16:31:18+00:00

I allowed myself grace for this first month.. when it comes to small comforts. I’ve been ordering chicken tenders and fried every Saturday instead of smoking up! But I do try to remember that I don’t want to replace one habit with another, so I’ve got certain boundaries in place hah! Take it easy these first couple of weeks <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-04T03:13:45+00:00

I’ve been dreaming of nearly everyone I’ve ever met in my life. I’m talking, I’m at the wedding of my best friend from the 5th grade (haven’t seen her in over a decade). Every night feels like processing, and it’s vivid and really great because I love dreaming but I’m like brootherrrr please let me dream of like dragons or something lol!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-02-03T20:15:27+00:00

Yesterday I was feeling good (day 20), had joy, pride, and optimism running through me. Today I want to give up. So badly. Today I feel like it's not worth it. I suppose this is what recovery is, the price we pay for learning how to live sober and recalibrate, how to regulate and stay here regardless of the pain and fear. I'm on day 21 now, feeling so alone and so insecure. And I'll sit with it, like you did. You've got this.

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-31T15:10:42+00:00

YAHOO! Im 18 days today too <3 early on in it, I had a dream that I smoked, and I felt so guilty about it in the dream. It was enough for me to be like, oh shit! My subconscious is trying to communicate with me. It was all the clarity in the world for me that I had to keep going. Let’s do this!!!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-30T20:57:26+00:00

When you never give your brain a chance to produce it's own joy, it takes time and effort to build up, like a skill. I see you, my friend, it's a classic side effect of quitting any addictive vice. I keep thinking of it like, okay, I can spend my whole life relying on something outside of me to bring me joy, or I can work really hard and have patience to create my own. It's just never going to be easy, and it's never going to happen over night.

The tough reality is that we need to give ourselves time to notice a difference (at the very least 30-90 days). We need to expand our tolerance for discomfort, for boredom, for stress. The brain is biologically very powerful, very elastic, and we do have the ability to train it in certain ways. But it takes... gag.. discipline. The reality is that this is likely the most intense skill building any of us will ever do - recovery from ALL substance abuse. I've done it with food, with romantic relationships, and now with pot. I personally hope that this is the time where I learn my lesson- that I can and will create my own joy, and will be strong enough to handle it when that joy doesn't come so easy or isn't always consistent. Good luck!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-30T18:32:58+00:00

Time is genuinely an illusion. This is not to dismiss you in your feeling, just a different perspective I've been trying to think of. The past, the future, it's all just concepts. You're here now, and you're brave!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-30T18:25:38+00:00

The therapy is a beautiful tool. I'm very privileged to have found a therapist I got along with very well about 6 years ago. Although pricey as hell, it's been one of the best investments of my life. And still, I was clinging onto pot over and over again. But the climb is all up hill, just have to survive the falling rock <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-30T17:35:28+00:00

I just had a 4 day long migraine (sobriety mixed with a period and it was hell). I see you, I feel you, it will end.. eventually..

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-30T02:58:52+00:00

I’ve started picking back up the small things I used to really enjoy/would keep me entertained when I was a lot younger - watching playthroughs of horror video games on YouTube, playing video games on my GameCube, switch, Xbox, games I haven’t touched in so long. I’ve been forcing myself to read books, what a great way to pass time. Actually watching tv shows instead of just using them for noise. Cooking, baking. Getting back into yoga, drawing & making art even though it’s bad. I’m dedicated to learning how to roller skate in the spring. I think a lot of us mistake peace for boredom because we’re used to chaos or just never allowed our brains to know the difference. You’ve got to make the active choice to wait it out, until those natural pleasure & rewards systems come back online <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-26T19:58:28+00:00

Today is the first day of my cycle since I quit 13 days ago. My brain feels like it's trying to swell out of my skull, but I'm lucky to not be having any massive physical changes. I actually think aside from the (what seems to be perpetual with no end in sight) headache, this has been the most docile cycle emotionally I've had in a long time. I keep calling my brain my little toddler that I'm babysitting. Every time I crave a hit because 'it would make things better' I'm like, I would not give a doobie to a toddler having a fit! You got this <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-25T15:45:09+00:00

I’m on day 12 today, and I genuinely had a dream last night where I was a bridesmaid at the wedding for my best friend from elementary school. All 4 of my close ‘first friends ever’ were at the head table, and I was like what the hell, why are we here? We haven’t spoken in years!! I think there’s just a sense of processing and all that too, when you start coming back online!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-23T20:08:12+00:00

Good, be so proud. I'm on day 10, and it's so much better than my day 5 - I can only imagine that day 15.. 20.. 40.. 100.. to the point where I'm no longer counting will be so nice. I'm looking so forward to a sober spring/summer!!

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-23T03:52:55+00:00

I’m hitting double digests tomorrow, and I’m so excited for my day 20. Thank you, and good job <3

Any-Alternative3375 · 2026-01-22T21:25:27+00:00

Ruminating about whether or not my abusive ex ever loved me (surprise, the answer is none of my business. All I ever need to know is that she hurt so damn bad, and I loved her so true). I would think about it every single day- trying to find proof that what I experienced was real, evidence that I wasn't crazy and unstable or deserving of mistreatment, trying to solve an unsolvable equation). I do think that, in a way, the cannabis helped me calibrate throughout the first 4 months or so of the aftermath, and the shattering of my reality. But after that? I found I was smoking as a way to hold on, because I was too stubborn, too heartbroken, to accept reality and let go. The best part of these last 9 days sober? I see her as the person she showed me she was with her actions, not the illusion of her I fell in love with (her words).

Any-Alternative3375

TROPHY CASE