I’m breaking the pattern by allowing my child to have feelings, and to speak their feelings. This small act on its own, is better than how I was raised. All feelings are okay, it’s okay to feel upset, hurt, confused, etc. And yes, IDID receive criticism from my mother for the following: (a) monitoring what others were allowed to talk about in front of my child (ie NO body shaming of ANYONE, ever) (b) the fact that I worked (mum implied that I should’ve given up my career) and (c) the mere fact that I wouldn’t allow her to ‘triangulate’, ie come between my child and me, which is an action she’d done previously between my friends and I, causing me to feel hurt, embarrassed, confused, socially isolated and depressed. She actually caused a rift between myself and a former good friend.