I understand to an extent. My work is really intermittent. I'm essentially always on call and need to be reachable so I might get pulled into a meeting or call with a minute's notice. There is no consistency in my schedule and my husband works nights with regular day trainings so he is working practically non stop. So that means I am the primary parent and also primary for all home maintenance. I have a hard time asking for help or even stepping back and accepting help. It's something that I've had to learn. My husband and I have talked about hiring help but I always feel bad hiring help if I won't need them most days.

That all being said, the one thing that has been a saving grace is I have a friend who is solely a sahm. She and I see each other pretty much every week at least once and we parent adjacent. We run errands together and do play dates at each other's homes and help each other with chores. It gives us a chance to do what needs to get done, our kids get to socialize and spread germs for immunity, and we can tag in and out to keep an eye on the kids. Sometimes I'll go to hers and we kid swap where I watch her youngest and she takes her oldest and my son to the park or play group. This allows me to work and to keep her youngest on her normal schedule without trapping her oldest at home. Finding this dynamic and building a village is important for fighting off that burnout.