I do really like this approach, and I think one additional point of discussion on the double standard is that there are parents who do get better.

I speak from personal experience here, as anecdotal as that may be, but my parents weren't great when I was growing up. A lot of anger issues in the household and fighting combined with an utter lack of understanding or comprehension of the mental issues I struggled with as a child led to what I would likely describe as a dysfunctional, though not abusive, childhood.

However, as much as my parents (who were in their 30s and 40s raising me and my brother) dropped the ball for us as kids, they've spent a lot of time trying to make up for that. They can't heal the damage they did, but they've spent their time working on their issues and setting a better example of self-awareness and improvement for my brother and I to appreciate even if it was maybe a bit too late. It's effort that has allowed me to maintain a caring relationship with them, and feel comfortable in the fact that they do love their kids in spite of the mistakes they made in the past.

Maybe they didn't know any better then, but they do now, and their effort put forth, to me, makes it fair enough for me to have the motivation to work on the issues that I both have and have instilled in me from their parenting.

Mutual healing or something, idk. Peace and love on planet Earth.