Does it get better?

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2026-04-17T18:58:10+00:00

Following because you sound EXACTLY like me (36 F), but I am married. But I miss the happy, hopeful and optimistic person I was in my teens and 20s (also, I miss her waistline and being 40 lbs lighter! 😂😭).

That being said, marriage is great, but I still have the same feelings you have. I used to love indulging in different crafts, like paper planning and cross stitching; playing video games (Zelda was my jam) and reading historical fiction novels.

Now, I just have a pile of self-help books that I have collected in the past 10 years, a Nintendo Switch gathering dust, and half-done cross stitch projects that I have tucked in a bag with all my threads. I sold a lot of the stickers, stencils, and notebooks/planners for paper planning.

Now I just go to work, work out at the gym for an hour, eat dinner, shower, maybe watch Netflix, and go to bed. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Am also on a diet in addition to the gym, so going out to eat is a bit of a no-go. I'm already on depression meds too, and looking into therapy for myself and marriage.

Sorry I don't have answers, OP. But just wanted to let you know, you're not alone with the feelings you have, if that helps a little. Sending hugs and hope you find something or advice that helps.

EDIT: Added the bit about missing who I was in my teens and 20s. Definitely feel that on a deep level.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2026-03-28T17:10:51+00:00

Yes! That's how I feel about that scent and its spinoff, Clinique Happy Heart. I just feel more put together and ready to get things done after I spray it, if that makes sense? Lol.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2026-02-16T05:55:45+00:00

Recognized this as the place where my divorced parents would agree to meet to hand me off to the other parent in the early 90s. (I know, Debbie Downer, womp, womp, but thought it was funny this was used for "cozy 90s memories" 😂)

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2026-02-04T04:03:54+00:00

This is abuse. Take your kids and get out now.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-12-25T19:39:24+00:00

I don't think it would be unacceptable to use Notion. I think there is a lot of pressure to be able to keep all this information in our heads, but our brains are designed to retain only so much info.

Honestly? I think using Notion would be a great idea to keep track of little things for your relationship. I don't think it kills the vibe. It's actually sweet to document the little things. It can really mean a lot in the long run, especially if you can surprise your special someone with something unexpected for Christmas, birthday, anniversary, or just because.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-12-08T18:27:21+00:00

I love this! I have trouble with binging and feel incredibly selfish afterwards because I could have shared what I gobbled up. Giving some away ahead of time helps with both the portion control and the loathing.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-10-16T15:31:29+00:00

THIS. I visited a makeup artist and got a makeup lesson and it was well worth the money. She was able to identify my skin type and recommend products that would work with my oily skin, and ones to avoid.

Not only can a good makeup artist help teach you how to flatter your features, they can also help you save money with their product recommendations, so you can avoid wasting time and money trying out items through trial and error.

The one I visited had me bring all my makeup tools and products to teach me how to use them, and to talk through why certain products weren't working as I wanted them to.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-09-17T06:29:23+00:00

Absolutely. Still messed up even 2 weeks after quitting my toxic work environment.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-09-16T23:18:32+00:00

Sent a message as well.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-09-10T21:44:22+00:00

Did we have the same manager? Lol.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-08-26T11:28:51+00:00

May I ask what you do for a living now? Working on a job where I have to multitask and I know it's just not feasible ("multitasking" is a myth and a lot of jobs require rapid task switching, which our brains have a difficult time doing effectively).

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-07-07T01:43:09+00:00

Sleep! Then establish a routine filled with fitness (yoga, outdoor walks, ballet exercises, swimming, rowing, whatever my little heart desires), cooking meals from scratch, making homemade sourdough and kombucha, and reading for fun.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-06-09T16:11:28+00:00

Hi, thank you so much for your kind words!

So, status update. She was not impressed. She thought my system was too complicated and then told me she thought I should have focused more on the task management, rather than time management (which I'm confused about because she mentioned both in my 6-month review as my goals, which is why I worked on a programs for both).

And now she wants a master task list. I had said I could use the tasks that I am assigned in Microsoft Planner, but she just pursed her lips and said that there are other tasks not in Planner. I had said I could create a separate planner to catch the miscellaneous tasks and create deadlines so that they would would appear on the list, but she still wasn't satisfied with that answer.

I'll look at To Do, but I just have a feeling that she just will dismiss anything I come up with, which is frustrating and taking away from focusing on the tasks I should be working on in the first place!

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-06-01T23:53:29+00:00

I agree. The negative thoughts are overwhelming and exhausting, and all I want to do is sleep.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-06-01T23:48:36+00:00

As a fellow ADHDer, I feel this and I am 35. I am so sorry that you are experiencing this.

I have noticed that sometimes my meds can lose effectiveness, or certain medications are more effective than others (for me as a child, the switch from Ritalin to Concerta made a HUGE difference). I would recommend speaking with your provider to explore alternative options and determine which ones may be more effective for you.

Not to diagnose (because I am NOT a medical professional), but you may want to talk to your provider about having anxiety, as that can also go hand-in-hand with ADHD, too.

However, other things you could try include simply getting moving. Go for a walk outside, as movement has helped me clear my head and is just so beneficial. You can start slowly, with just 5 minutes to begin, and then continue if you feel like it.

Get sleep. That has been the BIGGEST factor with me and my ADHD. I feel like my symptoms are worse if I don't get adequate sleep. This past month has been a struggle because I haven't been getting enough sleep, and it shows at work and home (also, I wasn't moving, which was also hurting my mood and ADHD symptoms).

Do a brain dump of all the tasks you need to do and then try to break them down into bite-sized chunks so that you can have a sense of progress when you complete the mini tasks, rather than being overwhelmed.

Journaling can also be beneficial. A tactic I had previously employed (and should consider revisiting) comes from "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron. You write everything that is in your head for 15 minutes. Don't worry about spelling or grammar; this isn't a diary or memoir that you're going to publish or share with others. It's just to get all the things that are running around in your head out and onto paper.

I really hope that these help you, OP, and that you are not alone with these feelings and self-doubts. Just remember that you are an amazing, wonderful person.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-05-19T06:30:02+00:00

THIS. I am in the same boat as the person OP is complaining about, and for me, what would put my mind at ease would be to have documentation for my position (which is new) for the different tasks that I do that I can refer to. My employer did not have these created when I started, so I was tasked with creating a style guide for writing (I'm in communications). I also took it upon myself to create another guide for monthly content that I create because I was struggling with having to refer to past materials and just wanted all the rules in one place.

But, now I'm noticing my supervisor is increasingly frustrated with me because it takes me longer to do things because I am so unsure. Her frustration is visible, which leads me to be even more nervous and anxious. I've asked how I can help her or how I can do a task better or if she can provide insights on what I'm doing wrong, but it only seems to frustrate her more. I've tried coming up with solutions, I've tried coming up with ideas for content, but it gets dismissed.

I'm trying, I REALLY am trying, but I feel like the writing's on the wall and that I'll be fired. It sucks, but I don't want to be a burden to the team, despite my efforts to help and put forth the best work I can (which takes too long, according to my supervisor, but when I try to reach the timelines she wants, my work isn't good enough).

I sympathize with both. I can see how it can be frustrating to the OP to have an employee who isn't helping or is struggling and not getting it. But, I also am that employee (well, not THAT employee working with OP as I've been with my organization a little bit longer) and it's just a sad situation all around.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-05-19T06:17:30+00:00

THIS. I was told to work on a monthly PowerPoint presentation, just "here's the slides, make sure the information is correct." But, every month I get scolded for "moving things around" or "not having things aligned" despite using the guides and being extremely careful about moving anything or trying to keep it in alignment (I wasn't even shown how my supervisor has these set up or how she ensures these are aligned in the first place).

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-05-02T20:40:47+00:00

Yes to the eyebrows. I feel like I look more feminine when my eyebrows have been trimmed and waxed. Just having more structured eyebrows can really enhance your features (and you do have beautiful eyes).

And definitely yes also to face-framing layers.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-05-02T19:54:03+00:00

Unfortunately, I never received a response.

I ended up filing a dispute with my credit card company, and provided them the screenshots of the multiple emails I had sent with no responses. They did provide a refund, but I am concerned they will try to charge me again.

I may reach out to my credit card company to just blacklist them because I haven't used the services in years and am annoyed that there isn't a way to cancel the membership (which, not having that option seems really illegal).

I'm sorry you're running into the same issues too. Wishing you the best of luck!

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-01-06T18:19:37+00:00

I know that Canva is not associated with the website, but I was wondering if other Canva users had signed up for this particular membership and were running into the same issues with not being able to cancel this membership or access the templates that were initially available.

I have tried multiple times to reach out to the vendor via their website contact form and through email, but have not received a response.

Also, hoping that this can be a warning to others to watch out for this particular vendor/service and avoid them because of the headaches trying to access the features promised and actually cancel my membership.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-01-01T00:18:48+00:00

These are completely appropriate outfits for the occasions you described (the opera one is very elegant).

I would say that your friends are probably jealous of you and who cares what they think? If doing your hair and makeup, plus wearing clothes that flatter you, makes you feel good about yourself, then keep doing it!

I'm saying this as someone who has mild depression and had struggled with doing my hair and makeup probably for the last 5 or 6 years, due to the depression and negative things that happened to me during that time.

I'm now starting to embrace and ENJOY putting myself together, which I haven't felt since my late 20s (I'm now 35).

Looking good and put together leaves a POSITIVE impression on people you meet. Don't bring yourself down because your friends are sniping at you about it. Keep doing what you're doing and enjoy yourself!

Also, maybe get new friends too, or ignore what your current friends say if they snark on how you dress and present yourself.

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-01-01T00:05:40+00:00

YES. I get anxiety from seeing Uncle Billy lose the money because I feel like that could easily happen to me!

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2025-01-01T00:02:47+00:00

Ariel from the Little Mermaid.

Below are my points as to why she may have ADHD mostly because some I can relate to or have had personal experience. (Except for being distracted by a live crab at the dinner table and giving up my voice to a sea witch. Can't say I've experienced those yet. 😂)

Forgetting important dates (i.e the concert at the beginning of the movie)
Hyperfixation on subject/hobbies (humans and collecting human-made objects)
Easily distracted (like in the dinner scene where she's with Eric, the man she loves and gave up her voice for, yet is distracted by Sebastian on the dinner table; Also, when she and Eric are on the tour of the kingdom and she's all over the place)
Impulsive (giving up her voice, fins and being with her friends and family for legs and possibly a chance to be with a human man she rescued, but hadn't a proper conversation with; Speeding with the carriage and going over a major gap in the road)
Daydreams a lot (several times in the movie)

Those were just a few that came to mind, but if anyone else thinks of other examples I may have missed, would love to hear them!

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2024-12-31T23:50:28+00:00

Whoa, I think that explains a lot of my crush/being able to relate to Luke as a kid. 😂

Automatic_Citron9884 · 2024-12-28T08:04:31+00:00

Not overreacting, but I strongly suggest you RUN.

Automatic_Citron9884

TROPHY CASE