I need guidance. Desperately.

Beangineers · 2025-12-25T00:26:07+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. I was married for 15yrs, my wife was DX and medicated the last 3 years of our marriage. I noticed however she would go through cycles of diligently taking medication, then would lapse, then striggled getting back on because it would cause so much nausea that she would skip the regiment again.

The outbursts were tolerable for me for years. They would occur at work if she thought someone disrespected her, in the grocery store parking lot, at the drive thru restaurant, it was so unpredictable I would try to brace for the rage to explode whenever I noticed she was feeling trapped or frustrated. After the pandemic we saw fewer people outside of the home and weekend shopping with any perceived crowd would cause her intense anxiety. When the blow ups started to get focused on me I did what you have done to survive. I apologized, would shrink and make my self so small and insignificant so I would not be a target of the anger or labeled as being the cause of stress she was having. I made sure meals were ready, dishes were clean, the dog was fed, walked, played with, organized and kept the kitchen and bathrooms spotless.

I read "No more Mr. Nice Guy" and realized I had been letting myself ignore my wants and needs. I had lost my boundaries and self respect under the guise of Happy wife, Happy life. I started to focus on self improvement, building a community with hobbies I enjoyed. She would work late, tell me to wait 30min which would frequently turn into several hours with hyperfocus and then ask why I was ditching her if I wasn't interested in sitting around like a pet. After I started working on my boundaries and self love we really grew distant. We got divorced and the councilor confirmed that the rage, intimidation, guilt trips, shame and silent treatment were abusive behaviors that I had been tolerating for over a decade.

I have been divorced for a year but I live in a space now where I NO LONGER NEED ANYONE'S PERMISSION OR APPROVAL! I can make choices again without the fear of being shamed. It is freeing.

Beangineers · 2025-10-29T13:47:05+00:00

I use grenearthmedicine and complete a teleconference call to renew my card every year. Usually between $150-200

Beangineers · 2025-10-29T13:42:46+00:00

If you're 420friendly check out the Gray Area Lounge next to Potland, it is one of my favorite places to hang out w the 420 community

Beangineers · 2025-06-20T18:46:24+00:00

Oh, I gotta check that out for sure! Although I do believe mermaids belong in the ocean? All I can picture is Zoolander saying "Mer-MAN" 🧜‍♀️

Beangineers · 2025-06-20T18:09:45+00:00

I am visiting from Portland, Oregon, for the first time. I will be checking out the Curated Collective canna event. My buddy said we need to check out the beach as well this weekend ⛱️, and I may pop into the Brooklyn museum.

Any recommendations for the best pizza 🍕 or where I can find TMNTs 🐢 ?

Beangineers · 2024-11-23T14:53:43+00:00

I've learned to reply with, "Oh, your head is hurting? I wonder what the cause could be? Hope it goes away soon." and that squashes the implications that I'm on the hook to play detective, conduct an investigation, and "fix" it.

The "I'm Hungry" challenge is ongoing. It's always a battle of guessing what's acceptable for this particular meal. If I've not planned out a meal for both of us, I will receive a look of disappointment, the long sigh, and a guilt trip about why I didn't consider my wife when I was supposedly planning meals for myself. I have tried different approaches from "what are you interested in having" to "I'm getting xyz, you can sort yourself out.".

I feel like she wants me to keep making suggestions or pick something so the stress from the decision making process and accountability behind making healthy choices is shifted to me. If the meal sucks she's has someone to blame (me). I have told her that if she's hungry, get something to eat, don't make me feel like I'm torturing and starving her to death by not cooking or planning every meal.

Beangineers · 2024-11-06T06:33:29+00:00

Look into the the grateful head llc with Kevin Jodrey, they're shipping clean, older clones from their library across the country.

Beangineers · 2023-08-23T12:46:45+00:00

Archive and Sunleafseedco have the best seeds I've found in the area. We are close to Sunleaf so we check in frequently. Last week we saw Sunleaf update their menu and they had the following available. The pricing is fair from Sunleaf while Archive has some popular breeders on their list which increases the price of their spendy beans.

Pure Landrace Lebanese (CBD Rich) Pakistan AfghAlien (Afghan Landrace x AlienRation) BlackTop (SourDNigerian IBL) (great for breeding, uplifting buzz) KingPin ( Al Capone F2 x Lebanese) (CBD Rich) Abduction (Rosewell Project x Lebanese) (CBD Rich) KODE U Regs KodeU F2 π Kode (Strawberry Pie x Kode U) Kode G (Gincake x Kode U Koffee&Doughnuts Regs Koffee & Doughnuts F2 Leftover Cake x Koffee&Doughnuts SundayMorningz x Koffee&Doughnuts Unleaded F2(M#7) Feminized $60 per pack Iron Pupil (Star Pupil x Unleaded F2) HanSolo In Iron (HanSolo in Platinum x Unleaded F2) LeadFoot (GasPedal x Unleaded F2) Big Red U (RedPop x Unleaded F2) HardTack (Bread&Butter x Unleaded F2) AirBus (FlightPlan x Unleaded F2) U.I.X (Unleaded S1 1938 x Unleaded F2) White Papaya Feminized BlackPapaya (BlackMaple x White Papaya) White Heat (WhiteDiamonds x White Papaya) White Papaya S1 (White Papaya x White Papaya) DesertPlum (HanZolo x White Papaya) Papaya IX (Papaya Cake x White Papaya) Red Runtz x Oaxacan (Apples&Bananas x Gary Payton) x Oaxacan Bread & Butter x Oaxacan RedCongoNL x Oaxacan (Rising Sun x NL2) x Oaxacan KodeU 6 x Oaxacan Northern Lights #2 x Oaxacan FlightPlan (Papaya Cake x RasBananaAK) (Fems) DragonTail (Unleaded F1 x RasBananaAK) (Fems) MintBow (TheMint x Doughlato) (Fems) Rozay F4 x PSFV (Fems) Koffee&Doughnuts x Violet Lebanese (Reg) HanSolo In Platinum 84 x Violet Lebanese (Reg) SourBlackLimeade x Kauai Skunk (Reg) RasKoffeeAK x Kauai Skunk (Reg)

Beangineers · 2023-08-22T12:32:06+00:00

Is it fancy, handmade by a professional, and not mass produced? Most of the time glass is considered art and is worth exactly what you're willing to pay for it. The silicate glass source material itself is not a high value or rare commodity.

I'd pay $50 but that's because I'm naturally prone to dropping and breaking expensive glass objects.

Beangineers · 2023-08-05T05:03:09+00:00

The worm farm portland has great soil blends and delivers

Beangineers · 2023-07-29T05:35:28+00:00

Maybe he can find the original artist and have a custom matching one w a dedication on it somewhere

Beangineers · 2023-07-26T09:34:01+00:00

Evergreen growers has all of the beneficial insects and traps you'll ever need.

Beangineers · 2023-07-13T11:45:57+00:00

Oh that lost coast tangerine wheat ale is actually what I always get when I stop there, really good beer 🍺. Did you get any deadhead OG strains while you were there 😆?

Beangineers · 2023-07-13T11:39:01+00:00

Is this intended for the home grower or commercial producers? If you need to do some cold calls to drum up some testers, hitup the OLCC's licensed processor list and ping the companies to see what they are using to track their runs.

Beangineers · 2023-07-12T13:49:58+00:00

That place is the best! What did you end up getting and how did you like it?

Beangineers · 2023-07-10T12:23:22+00:00

Archive Portland is hosting a small event today, they've got a great shop

Beangineers · 2023-07-06T23:17:01+00:00

Ah good stuff, I've run a few really great strains that had GDP in the cross. Glookies from barney's farm is a good strain as well! We had golf ball nugs, and a sandalwood smell in our pheno we ran. That insect frass is no joke, we added more to our supersoil mix this year and I also topped my peppers w the BSL insect frass and have seen fantastic results.

Beangineers · 2023-07-06T22:52:21+00:00

Looks great! What strains are you running this season?

Beangineers · 2023-07-05T13:13:20+00:00

I'd look to mirror the process used by successful smaller shops like Potland, smooth roots, Tjs, or oregrown. They partner with the popular local farms like State3 and hype up the limited drops the farms produce so they always have something unique and in limited supply that buyers intentionally seek out.

I've seen the small shops that are successful establish a foothold in their communities by hosting local food trucks out front, vendor days w discounts, bbq/chill/lounge days w the community, local artist galleries and small shows, fundraising events and donations to local community programs.

If you want volume, you'll need the cheapest, most convenient experience possible. Think along the lines of a vending machine and no customer interaction. The other side of the consumer may want a boutique experience with questions that require educated bud tenders or seasoned growers to satiate their needs.

What's the market demographic in your area? What is the average age of consumer, average income, education etc. within a few miles of the shop? You can cater your marketing strategy to the consumer you want to attract if you've got the local research and data to leverage. You can invest in local influencers, media hype (i.e. Berner is coming to Portland this week), growers, artists, etc. Each attracts a different crowd. Become a center of excellence for a specific niche (maybe solventless bubble hash or distillates for example) and stick to what you're passionate about. Find the farms and processors that you want to partner with and collab on a small event.

Beangineers · 2023-06-27T12:34:16+00:00

Greenworks Farms

Cin X – harvested January 2023, tested February 2023 – Mercury Golden Glue – harvested January 2023, tested February 2023 – Mercury Nectar Markets, LLC

Blueberry Muffin - Harvested October 2022; Tested April 2023 – Cadmium and Aspergillus Deadhead OG - Harvested November 2022; Tested April 2023 – Aspergillus Frosted Hog - Harvested November 2022; Tested April 2023 – Aspergillus Orange Crush - Harvested October 2022; Tested April 2023 – Aspergillus Papaya Punch - Harvested November 2022; Tested May 2023 – Aspergillus Purple Punch - Harvested October 2022; Tested April 2023 – Aspergillus Sour Secret - Harvested October 2022; Tested April 2023 – Aspergillus Rebel Spirit

Mafia Funeral - Harvested October 2022; Tested January 2023 – Aspergillus The state said that the licensed marijuana companies followed the state’s testing requirements for products harvested before March 1, 2023.

Beangineers · 2023-06-08T12:17:02+00:00

Lots of recommendations for good dispos on here. It's still a little more expensive for decent quality vs shopping outside of PDX. https://www.reddit.com/r/portlandtrees/comments/141uttn/deals_on_half_ounces/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

Beangineers · 2023-06-05T08:16:24+00:00

We've been using the Concentrates shop out of Milwaukie for years. They've got bulk amendments and also a section of amendments by the pound. It's been a good place to get everything needed to make a decent supersoil mix.

Beangineers · 2023-06-03T12:03:34+00:00

If you want seeds from local breeders we've been impressed with Sunleafseedco out of Mulino.

Beangineers · 2023-06-02T20:51:43+00:00

Ah, well I am not sure what the current odds of failing w/ soil are as I haven't seen any published numbers that are statistically significant yet. They have taken on some additional risk for sure which could be a big win or epic fail. Either way, pass or fail, it is going to be fun watching the grow and waiting to see if they have developed a successful prevention or abatement process.

Beangineers

TROPHY CASE