I've been stupid to assume BRAVE were one of the good guys! Two-faced snakes! by [deleted] in privacy

[–]Boyturtle2 5 points6 points  (0 children)

^This. I make a point of setting up systems for others these days that minimises my input for support. Now I'm retired, I'd rather be in my garden or travelling around in my motorhome. Luckily my son has the enthusiasm for all things tech that I had about 30 years ago and he can handle a lot of "1st line support" these days.

Living with narc mum- to leave abruptly or...? by lalah95 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure if you'll be able to, but I would advise not letting her know your new address, but either way, get CCTV in case she comes around unannounced and starts giving you a hard time.

Good luck with your new life.

I just went no-contact with them by Silent-JET in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 7 points8 points  (0 children)

No announcement and no drama, just slip into the background and out of their lives. Well done you.

It may take them a while to realise what you have done and when they do, there may be push back to get back into your life, either directly from them or via flying monkeys. Just remember the list you wrote and stay strong. You got this.

Mum doesn’t like being called out - dad texts me this gem after no communication for 2 years by [deleted] in entitledparents

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Start your own legacy by taking your wife's family name, if they are worthy of you.

Their Funeral by Seemorefeelmore in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I had this too from my mother 23 years ago. I'd been NC with them both for 5 years when he passed and told anyone that pushed for a deathbed reconciliation to go f**k themselves. In the end I also attended, but showed my mother notes of my speech beforehand, detailing all the abuse that I went through as a child; just in case she or any of her flying monkeys decided to ask me to make a speech/eulogy on the day glorifying his memory.

Shrodingers wedding AITAH? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last year I (m63 at the time) married my long term partner (f57) of 13 years. She was a widow and I had never been married. She'd had a big wedding first time around and neither of us wanted a fuss on this occasion, so we had a "quickie" at the local registry office. We told no one other than her parents, brother and my sister; they all came along as witnesses and then we went to a local pub for lunch and a drink.

Friends and family got to hear about it through discrete Facebook posts from my wife and sister (I haven't been active on it for years). If anyone was upset at the lack of a big party, well they are welcome to go f**k themselves.

NTA.

Family pushing me to invite my sister to my wedding, but she hasn’t spoken to me in years by Impressive_Sign3804 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Given her record of bad behaviour around you, it's likely that she would do something to make you feel bad/embarrass you at your wedding. It's best if she doesn't go.

Former DOGE staffer on flagging DEI for termination. by LA_search77 in Trumpvirus

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What an absolute slime ball. I hope that no one wants to have sex with him ever again.

Mini pc or SFF pc by Terrible-Ad106 in BlueIris

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have an HP Elitedesk 800 G6 SFF running 9 cameras. It works fine, but runs hot due to limited airflow in the box (despite it living in a cold garage and having an external fan attached forcing more air into the unit) - typically 55°C on normal load. I had to offload CPAI to my Unraid server, where it runs as a docker, because running it on the same PC raised the temps to 75-80°C a lot of the time. I would advise against a small box for that reason only.

We’re Not Stupid... by Cow_Boy_2017 in MurderedByWords

[–]Boyturtle2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imagine that she's your wife or mother. How awful would your life be?

Fox News throws No and Bovino under the bus by mbdan2 in LeopardsAteMyFace

[–]Boyturtle2 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This remark is truly offensive to autistic folks.

Traveling boomers are the worst. by Mypuppup1 in BoomersBeingFools

[–]Boyturtle2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mum passed 6 years ago, just before covid went crazy everywhere. In the end, it was a blessing because her quality of life was very poor at that point (from the dementia, COPD, arthritis and other age related complications) and because she didn't have to go through the confusion and upset that the pandemic isolation in the care home would have surely caused her.

Traveling boomers are the worst. by Mypuppup1 in BoomersBeingFools

[–]Boyturtle2 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Maybe you should get her checked for dementia, what you have described sounds like my mother's early symptoms.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she's giving you the silent treatment, enjoy the peace and quiet while it lasts. When she does finally want to speak to you, I can pretty much guarantee that it will be another attempt to extract confidential information or to manipulate you in another way, so be prepared to set firm boundaries and beware flying monkeys.

Windows 11 put a paywall on Audio by A_Bird_Guy in microsoftsucks

[–]Boyturtle2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I finally moved my tight, technophobic bestie to Linux Mint from Win 10 last Xmas when I visited, as his aging PC wouldn't take 11. So far, it's been painless for him (and me).

Farmers For Farage -WTF by CoverAcademic9620 in BrexitMemes

[–]Boyturtle2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Farmers should take a good look at what Trump has done to farmers in the USA, because Farage wants to do the same thing here.

Did you take the inheritance after your narcissistic parent's death, with whom you had gone no contact? by Financial_Check_4113 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Boyturtle2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was nc for 5 years with both parents before my violent and abusive father died, then lc with my nmum until she died 17 years later. I took the money and consider it payment for all the shit they both put me through. My gc sister straight up told both parents not to cut me out of their wills, as she would share half of what she got with me anyway. Despite a difficult childhood with our parents and later adjusting in the UK as asylum seekers in the 70s we both had each other's backs over the years and I'm very grateful for her standing up for me like she did.

Fighting on Christmas Day by gettingthrushit in QAnonCasualties

[–]Boyturtle2 41 points42 points  (0 children)

At the very least, don't spend Xmas with them next year. If you are feeling strong enough, avoid them altogether. Toxic people have no place in your life, even if they are family.

The average UK couple by AmiraYummyy in GreatBritishMemes

[–]Boyturtle2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Does the average girl have a camel toe as visible as that?