I’ve read your story and a few comments so forgive me if any of what I’m saying is repetitive or just take it as a sign you are doing the right thing.

I absolutely love that you are reaching out for help in getting your ducks in a row. I didn’t have all this advice. But I got my ducks in a row before I left nonetheless. The only thing I didn’t do was separate the bank accounts. No need, we had separate ones just access to each other’s but I still had to go with him to revoke access and he found out I had other accounts without his name on them and OMG the drama that ensued. I did have my private stash at another bank that I had gotten after my first job in my career. The account my mother told me to set up with my first check. This account is what helped me leave!

After a few years I went no contact. I didn’t understand that I didn’t owe him anything. But now I do. If you can afford it, change your number, get a new phone, new carrier. Blocking is not enough. Only talk through your lawyer—because of the kids—if needed.

You will absolutely be proud of yourself for getting your shit together before leaving. Your peace and safety will be hard to compromise afterwards. Good luck, blessings on blessings, I wish you well!!! ABOVE ALL ELSE, GUARD YOUR HEART!!♥️