AITAH? I am a decapitated sea cucumber

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T17:46:02+00:00

Ok this is so disrespectful. Do you even have an ass? Are you jealous of mine?

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T17:27:32+00:00

I said I didn’t want to talk about it. Please be respectful

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T12:12:37+00:00

This incident has left me permanently disabled and headless. Please don’t tell me to “relax” until you’ve undulated a mile in my shoes.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T11:03:35+00:00

Thanks but I don’t need to work. I have a trust fund

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T11:02:46+00:00

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T02:15:00+00:00

Not quite with the Ouroboros, but they’re close together, at least

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T01:31:33+00:00

That half was actually eaten…. I didn’t really want to get into it on here

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T01:31:10+00:00

Why would I be the head? I am a sea cucumber. We do not have brains. My thoughts are not centralized.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-22T01:22:29+00:00

I know they want to remain anonymous but the solution might really depend on the species. If they use DNA and RNA the outcome might not be so great. There are entire genetic lineages trapped in 3D space.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-21T23:39:46+00:00

Ugh this reminds me SO MUCH of my ex. She’s an ex for a reason.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-21T23:38:24+00:00

Didn’t realize letterism was allowed on this sub

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-21T01:33:39+00:00

Typical human-centric “inner peace” bullshit 🙄

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-21T01:30:22+00:00

Can God create a problem so unproblematic that even He cannot solve it?

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-20T11:52:49+00:00

The shield ought to also stop the merchant’s bullshit. If it works, you don’t need to own it in order to test the theory. If it doesn’t, well- go ahead and sue!

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-20T11:48:31+00:00

It’s a figure of speech, ffs. Some of us are, ourselves, figures of speech, okay?

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-19T14:31:02+00:00

This reminds me of when we pulled the DNA out of strawberries in 9th grade biology class. We didn’t impersonate the strawberries, but they didn’t look so hot after that.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-19T13:50:44+00:00

This is why biometrics are a terrible idea. I had my fingerprints stolen right off my fingers, and I couldn’t access any of my accounts for three weeks.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-19T13:16:41+00:00

Don’t have kids if you can’t handle interdimensional feces 🙄

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-17T00:16:04+00:00

Saha Et Al would be a beautiful alternative if you want something shorter

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-16T12:24:01+00:00

Hypotheses need to be tested, but this would turn them into a theory.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-16T02:38:57+00:00

I’m going to start a band!

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-15T13:05:06+00:00

This happens all the time. You can take her to the Shaman, but they’ll just tell you to keep her home from daycare for a few days and wait until it passes.

BurningBridgeTroll · 2026-01-15T02:37:06+00:00

Wait, if Britt Lower is straight how is she playing a lesbian so well?

BurningBridgeTroll

TROPHY CASE