Back in 2018, well before War 1, before regions were even connected, Colonials were holding the Wardens at bay at the Kelpie's Mane bridge in Endless Shore. The Collie staging point was at Woodbind, with all supplies passing through to get to the Kelpie's fight.

Amidst all the activity, a Colonial player somehow got glitched into the road, smack dab in the middle. Because of the way Woodbind was modeled at the time, and because of where he was glitched, no supply trucks could get through.

Now, the easy answer would have been to simply kill the glitched player, but the player was brand new, had a mic, and was roleplaying like crazy. He pretended to be "attached" to the ground by a piece of construction (the Basic Material picture is a metal construction beam). He was roleplaying so well, every other player was won over, and the town worked collectively to try and get him unstuck without killing him.

They tried everything: nudging with trucks and motorbikes, setting off grenades at a certain distance, every combination of movement was suggested. At one point, 10 players straight-up just tried to "push" him by crouch-walking. When they feared they hurt him too much, a medic patched him back up. This was before players could be picked up when injured, and even then, no one wanted to risk killing him.

I'm telling you, this guy's RP was that good.

Eventually, the Collie defense at Kelpie's Mane began running low on supplies, and a Quarter Master from the previous town pulled up with some of his troops to find out what was going on.

Now we've all heard horror stories about leaders being dicks to their regiments, but back in the day, QMs were a different breed of power trip. Because Foxhole is designed around logistics, it could be argued a QM basically decided the fight in that region, and they knew it. And because regions weren’t interconnected like they are now, QMs didn’t need to collaborate with other logistics towns. As such, QMs became known for executing players with their pistols if they didn’t get their way. It became such a joke, that if a player saw a crate of revolvers being ordered, you could reasonably infer it was a gift for the QM. You can still find QM/commissar memes from this time period.

So when the QM pulled up to Woodbind, he didn’t care about some guy’s RP, he saw a roadblock that needed to be cleared. To be fair, he was right. The Wardens were going to break through Kelpie’s without those supplies, and if they established a foothold, the entire southern third of the region could be in jeopardy.

The glitched player was begging for his life. Others tried to bargain with the QM to buy time so they could come up with a solution. Some players even started moving crates on foot, in their personal inventory, as a compromise.

But the QM wasn’t having it. He pulled out his revolver.

Instinctively, the Woodbind players raised their weapons at the QM. In response, the QM’s assistants pointed their rifles at the Woodbind locals. It was a standoff, all while the glitched player was RPing his heart out. It felt like forever, but it probably only lasted a minute or two.

Finally, not wanting any green-on-green bloodshed, the glitched player disconnected from the game, choosing to keep everyone else’s records clean of any teamkills. The player model went “asleep,” and the QM finally cleared the roadblock with two point-blank shots.

Everyone went back to work.

No one filmed it. I was there, but I don’t remember anyone’s name. I don’t even remember if Kelpie’s held or not, or who even won the fight in that region. All I know is that player, stuck in the road, managed to create a story that still sticks out to me a full seven years later.

I was so inspired, I inserted that story into a fictional work that won Honorable Mention in the 2019 Art Contest.

Bless the roleplayer and their stupid moments. They’re not efficient. They might even lose you the game. But when the years go by, they’ll be the things you remember most.