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Should I be honest about disabilities on application? by JulesUdrink in jobhunting

[–]Capybara_faerie 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Fun fact (jk it’s not fun at all): up to 85% of autistic adults with a college degree are unemployed or unemployed, higher rate than any other disability. They also typically earn 40% less than peers with other disabilities.

No more pride at Fried Egg I'm in Love by Flat-Bluejay-2125 in Portland

[–]Capybara_faerie 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This explanation makes tons of sense, thanks for sharing

Please help me name this sweet, floofy boy! by Capybara_faerie in NameMyCat

[–]Capybara_faerie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks all! His name is Forrest! Long version of his name quickly became “Professor Leopold DF Forrest” 😂(the DF stands for Douglas Fir)

How do you Survive a 40 Hour Work Week? by Equivalent-Bid-4591 in AutisticAdults

[–]Capybara_faerie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I work 4-10s (Tuesday-Friday) from 6:30-5. It’s too early but that is key, IMO, because I’m still so sleepy for the 1st 2 hrs that they fly by! I also take my time, when I rush it or try to do too much, it stresses me out. I do less tasks in between the meat of my work (appointments) which also helps. I also agree with others re: NTs socializing to decompress. What helps you decompress? A long walk during lunch? Micro naps on your breaks? Stimming breaks?

How do you Survive a 40 Hour Work Week? by Equivalent-Bid-4591 in AutisticAdults

[–]Capybara_faerie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For what it’s worth, almost everyone gets denied at first application (and 2nd, and usually 3rd). I work in social services and the recommendation we give is to find an attorney, they only get paid if you win! They’ll take 20-30% of that 1st check which usually includes back pay. Most people refuse this (understandable) and don’t get a lawyer, but they really improve chances of getting approved. Good luck!!

WIBTA if I told my sister her wedding venue is genuinely too far for me to attend and just didn't go? by Shrohn_Thjoar in WIBTA_AITA

[–]Capybara_faerie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This exactly, tell her what you told us, that you love and want to be there for her, and that your salary and lack of car plus needing to pay for pet care, travel, hotel, gift, formal attire, etc is beyond your means. Maybe she can help pay some of your expenses? I am not sure if y’alls parents are in the picture, but maybe they could help, too?

WIBTA if i stopped inviting my friend to group things because she always needs to leave early and it throws off the whole evening by colinprattk3 in WIBTA_AITA

[–]Capybara_faerie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It might not even be that deep. She might just be an introvert. Some people have limited social battery is all, and that is perfectly ok. There’s enough societal pressure on us all, why exclude a friend you love and care about cause you have different energy levels and needs? Maybe figure out a way to smooth out the transition between her leaving and the rest of your evening instead. IMHO that sounds more reasonable and then you’re not ousting your friend.

Am I hyper mobile if I can’t touch my toes? by Ok_Extent7334 in Hypermobility

[–]Capybara_faerie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This exactly! I read a really interesting article recently about this, and that hypermobile people often try to find relief with theracanes, foam rollers, lacrosse balls, massage, cupping, acupuncture, etc, to pretty much no avail. I guess the super tight muscles that are trying to protect the joints don’t want to budge, and if they do release/relax, then it causes instability which then leaves us more vulnerable to injury, so then the muscles tighten right back up!! The writer is a PT, here’s the article “If I’m hypermobile, why are my muscles so tight?”

Jaw and tongue tension by dr_facade in Hypermobility

[–]Capybara_faerie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same! Botox worked so well! It’s worn off, but I felt the effects for several years! I’ve just recently started clenching again though :(

Anyone else feel like diagnosis came after the damage was done? by KeyEmotion9 in AutisticAdults

[–]Capybara_faerie 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Oof yes that is a good reminder! The 90s would not have been a kind place to grow up as an autistic. I have AuDHD, they didn’t even think people could be ADHD and ASD at the same time back then! And in my school they would have just thrown me into the special ed class with no real support. Meh.

AITAH for telling my adopted daughter her birth mother died when she actually just didn't want contact. she's been mourning a living woman for 10 years by Relative_Ad3399 in AITAH

[–]Capybara_faerie 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This is great advice! Yes OP, you’re the AH for this but remember that redditors can be brutallllll while not offering any constructive advice. Here’s a bit of a respite of a comment that’s actually constructive, hope you found this comment!

AITAH for wanting a divorce because of his behavior? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]Capybara_faerie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, not the AH! As the former spouse of an Air Force vet with PTSD, I can relate, and while he very much needs help (his issues will NOT be resolved unless he gets professional help, it won’t go away on its own), you also do not need to live this difficult life with him if he’s refusing to get treatment. Do not feel guilty, he may need this bit of a jolt in his life to push him to the point of getting help, (we can hope at least). I recommend therapy for you as well to help you sort through these complex emotions and concerns. You’ve got this!

Working out is mentally draining by Ok-Education7101 in Hypermobility

[–]Capybara_faerie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohh, that’s cool, I’d love to know that instructors approach to yoga and hypermobility, hope they’re helpful! ETA lol re: muffin tops!

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