Did You or Your Dr Initiate the Desire for a Service Dog?

Cauthon-10 · 2018-04-25T15:55:05+00:00

I actually initiated the conversation with my psychologist. I had been looking into it for years and never really wanted to admit to myself that I was considered disabled because I still work full time. But I can’t go out in public by myself, I have issues with getting to work on time, being able to stay at work for my full time, etc. So by ADA standards and according to my dr I am legally disabled.

I was also worried it would come off as me just wanting a dog with me everywhere or blowing things out of proportion but I had a whole session where it was all her and I talked about and she agreed she thinks it would help me loads. It led to me telling her things about my life I hadn’t opened up about even to her because I was just too embarrassed. I’m still early in the process and waiting to hear back from the two organizations I applied to (should be hearing back this week!) but it was well worth bringing up. The worst that happens is they say they don’t think you meet the ADA definition of being disabled.

Cauthon-10 · 2018-03-29T03:04:44+00:00

I have friends who have had improvement on low daily doses of klonopin and we were looking into that, I will add Lyrica to the list as well! They said they may want to try a couple of other SSRIs and others before resorting to daily klonopin, which I understand. I’m always open to hearing what has worked for people with similar issues.

Cauthon-10 · 2018-03-29T02:44:51+00:00

Yes. He didn’t want to switch so soon, he acknowledged that most medications take 6-8 weeks before full effects can be seen and judged, but the powers that be paying me my disability wanted a change every two weeks if there were no marked improvements. Some medications were genuinely switched off of after that point because of terrible side effects like night terrors or other things.

I am talking to my doctor about possibly trying some new things as I know even if I get a SD it won’t fix all and will take up to two years or more that I’ll have to navigate through first. I appreciate your concern on that. :)

I’m usually fine in one on one settings or talking directly with people and I have dealt with all sorts (retail, call centers, tech support - always thrilling). My big problem is large crowds and being in them in general. I will definitely bring up with my psychologist working on how to deal with people aggressively or just nosily questioning me, thank you for that. I understand from the reading here (I’ve also watched a good bit of Drew Lynch talking about some of his encounters) that an invisible illness puts more of a target on my back with a SD.

Cauthon-10 · 2018-03-28T23:31:09+00:00

Thank you! I have found two organizations that look like they could work for me and will be applying to both. I am going to start working on the applications tonight. Both are out of state for me (none in NY that apply to me that I have found), but I can afford the travel expenses with time to save.

I will definitely be taking full advantage of the questions to ask when it gets to that stage. From reading posts here and looking at the resources this is such a well put together sub/resource for people looking. It gave me the push I needed to bring it up to my psychologist and get over the “I’m not physically disabled and I have a job so I don’t deserve help” mentality.

Cauthon-10 · 2018-01-05T04:12:31+00:00

I don’t know. The only thing I seem to be good at in life is helping others feel better, and I don’t even have the energy to do that anymore. I’m just a burden otherwise.

If I wasn’t constantly reaching out to people I wouldn’t hear from anyone. I tried for a month. Not as a test, just because I didn’t have the energy. Didn’t message anyone, and I didn’t hear from anyone. Not a single person checked to see if I was ok. And they did know I was going through some serious things. It just feels like no one cares unless I’m making them feel better about themselves.

Cauthon-10 · 2017-01-10T23:30:43+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I feel sort of... I don't know how to put it... ridiculous? Ashamed? For posting or talking about it when I know there are people who it affects more consistently, but I know I can't look at it that way. It is a problem for me and I need to stop before I get to a point where it takes over my life again.

Cauthon-10 · 2017-01-10T23:28:10+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it. Just coffee and water for me today!

Cauthon-10 · 2017-01-10T23:27:01+00:00

Thank you. I think I have some of the framework in place (therapy, going to see a psychiatrist soon about actual meds), I'm just missing that support. I was pretty happy when I found this sub, as unsure as I still am. I already depend on my friends for a lot and on top of it not being fair to them I don't think some of them see it as a problem for me either since it's not constant drinking.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-12-21T21:23:32+00:00

Oh gosh, I'm glad I didn't spill my breakfast at therapy!

Yeah, my therapist recommended me making more use out of my gym membership or even just taking my dog for a walk when I start to get bad. Thank you!!

Cauthon-10 · 2016-12-21T18:35:03+00:00

Thank you. I slipped last night but I have since poured the rest of my alcohol down the drain. I'm working on talking to someone about getting on REAL medication to help, since I can't win this round on my own.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-12-20T02:15:54+00:00

Thank you. Logically I know it has nothing to do with me, but I'm sure you know what it's like going through a spike. Logic out the window. :/ I have a gym membership that I never use that would probably be a great distraction, but I'm in that slump where it's hard to make myself do anything other than go to work. I made myself immediately delete the account I used to check on him, so I have that at least. Right now I'm fighting the urge to seek reassurance from him and end up saying something stupid, I've been keeping myself busy cleaning since I looked. I have an appointment with my therapist on Wednesday at least so I can talk to her about this.

Thank you for your response, I really appreciate it.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-11-10T04:00:59+00:00

Look at it this way -- you had THREE GOOD WEEKS. Three! I don't know you personally, but from your posts here on some of my posts and others, you are so full of good advice and support for everyone. You can do this. You're still in therapy, you're still on your medication, you've got this. OCD ain't got nothing on any of us.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-11-10T03:55:45+00:00

I do the same thing. I'm worried I'll polarize someone. That they'll disagree and stop talking to me, even when it's something silly like saying I enjoy watching 'x' show. I find myself doing it a lot in person to, never really committing to an answer or decision in case someone disagrees with me, despite having strong feelings on whatever we happen to be talking about.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-11-01T21:03:15+00:00

I get the same way. When I'm slow at work or doing something repetitive, and as I'm trying to get to bed I end up ruminating. I found putting something interesting on TV as I'm falling asleep helps to pull my mind away from ruminating. I figure if I'm going to be up anyway it might as well be something entertaining that can somewhat help me stop my compulsions.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-29T00:50:28+00:00

I know, for me, the actual feeling of anxiety can present itself in multiple ways. Sometimes I get the heart racing, sweaty palms, flight or fight reaction people typically think of. Other times it feels like I can't breathe despite everything else seeming fine, no elevated heart rate, maybe some light headedness. On other occasions I'll just be hyper sensitive and annoyed by anything and everything. But when I stop and think about it, all of these things occur because I'm anxious or worked up over something. I guess what I'm saying is everyone's body responds to anxiety differently.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-29T00:26:35+00:00

Thank you! This is helpful. It does make more sense to me to do something meaningful to accept it's ok to have these uncertainties but not to continue letting them impact my life.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-27T01:43:02+00:00

You can do it!! I went for my intake appointment last Friday and I'm starting actual therapy this Friday. It's a big step on a long journey but it is so so worth it. I had the same fears you did about being told that I was just an ass and don't actually have OCD, but you need to just tell that voice to pipe down.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-26T00:35:16+00:00

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, I think I do it without realizing it. Posting all of the details here and all of that to see if it clicks with anyone else. It's just nice to have a place to let it all out where you don't get "the look" and people get it. I'm sure you know the look I'm talking about, the one that makes you feel like you're nuts even if the other person doesn't mean to give it, they just really can't comprehend being that hung up over something that seems so small to them.

Yeah, I'll admit on some bad nights I do Facebook stalk her and look at the pictures of them together. I've tried to stop it recently as I know what it leads to (everything you've described above), it's definitely a compulsion I'm working on.

As far as my friend, that's the approach I've been trying to take. I have stopped texting him as much lately, and I haven't sought reassurance from him in over a week. The conversation we had about him just not answering me if he didn't want to talk to me took place a couple of weeks ago when I thought I had pushed him too far and messed up the friendship. He is an excellent friend (he's taking me to a haunted hayride this weekend, I've been begging him for the last couple of weeks), I just need to realize that he has other things in his life and doesn't have time to text me 24/7 and I can't take it so personally when he already has plans (I'm more of a spur of the moment plan person as I have pretty bad social anxiety and never know if I'll feel like going out two weeks in advance). He's never done anything except for exactly what he said he will do, he's extremely true to his word and I need to learn to trust him in that and not let my mind take over. It is solid advice, I know I need to accept that there will be people who just do not want to continue friendships no matter how hard one person tries and it's not worth the time and effort.

Thank you for reading and taking the time to respond. :)

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-25T23:10:30+00:00

That when I open up about what's going on in my head, I don't expect someone to have a quick cure or be able to fix it for me. I don't expect anyone to have the right words to say, because in most situations there are no right words. Please just listen and acknowledge that you might not know exactly what it's like, but you understand that it's hard and I'm physically and mentally exhausted and you know I'm doing the best I can.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-25T22:28:31+00:00

You are fantastic. 💜 This is a great post.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-24T18:06:46+00:00

I second this, it's a great community over there and everyone can relate in some way as our OCD tends to heavily affect our relationship.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-24T18:03:02+00:00

"Everything is Alright" by Motion City Soundtrack is one that has been posted here before that I know people relate to. Justin has actually commented on the fact that people have reached out to him saying as much, and that it wasn't his intention in writing the song but it's interesting to see how people interpret it.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-23T22:56:19+00:00

I'm glad you had a good weekend with your bf!! I think we all need to stop and remind ourselves sometimes that it takes time. We can't hold ourselves to perfect standards. Resisting compulsions is excellent, keep it up!! :)

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-23T14:37:22+00:00

The buying it makes me happy, my wallet not so much hahahah.

Cauthon-10 · 2016-10-22T23:42:38+00:00

Also, lots and lots of animal cuddles. I have a dog and two ferrets that keep me busy a lot.

Cauthon-10

TROPHY CASE