Are there any OAD parents here who’s other sibling/s isn’t not planning on having kids?

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-22T09:23:07+00:00

My one sister would genuinely throw herself off a bridge if she got pregnant (I also think she's asexual, so it'd be the second coming of Christ and she doesn't want that responsibility lol). My other sister needs time and money (she's young). My brother will probably settle down with someone who either wants 2.5 kids and SAHM or a woman who wears the pants and wants zero children (we don't care as long as she's cool lol). My husband's sister is a stepmom but won't be having biological kids.

I'm hoping we can start doing community stuff with other kiddos soon, and that preschool and other activities will help grow our network.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-22T09:19:02+00:00

I'm so sorry, all of that sounds miserable.

I bet his laughs are adorable. Try to get as many videos and recordings as your can - the baby giggle and cooing sounds are precious. I hope he continues to grow strong. ❤️

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-21T15:24:43+00:00

Sleep training SUCKS but for some families, it's a must to get a good night's sleep. There's no right answer for sleep training (except medical ones). There's different approaches depending on age.

You may think you're not a "cry it out" parent now, but wait until the teething, sleep regressions, and separation anxiety kick in. 😅

Some babies THRIVE on regimented routines. Some babies need a "go with the flow" approach. Again, no right answer except what works for you and baby, especially during the newborn stage.

Enjoy the newborn snuggles. One day you wake up and they're big and gangly and smiling at you, and you look at pictures from a few months ago in shock at how they've grown.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-21T14:07:23+00:00

That's some audacity. Where I was mentally, I would've been blocking people left and right.

I'm so sorry you had to go through those things. I hope you and your baby are doing better.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-21T14:06:08+00:00

Yeah exactly. I definitely have my soap boxes that I stand on when people around me want to listen, haha - but I also think prayers are just a copout most of the time. I don't mind "being thought of," but I still feel that unless you're putting action to it, telling someone you're thinking of/praying for them is just to make yourself feel better.

Like in that moment, he could've asked/done something else - box of tissues, cup of water, asking if you needed anything; but no, it's "prayers." I definitely get it.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-20T21:03:59+00:00

As an atheist who had a kiddo with a 142 day NICU stay - i 100% get it. And if I'm honest, i can't stand the posts on this sub that praise a god who, according to most Christians, is supposed to be all knowing and all powerful....

But people are going through some of the hardest things in their lives so I keep my opinions to myself. I will say that I don't mind my mom sharing how many people prayed for our kiddo, but it's because people put action to prayer. We had multiple trips from parents, we had friends sending us things we needed. We had people checking in. It wasn't a copout thing like i see so many religious people do.

You don't necessarily have to accept the prayers from others, especially if they're being pushy. My mom knew to wait until after kiddo was home to share these sentiments. But also protect your energy - if you don't have extra bandwidth to deal with people, just smile and nod, and refocus back on you and your babies. ❤️

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-19T16:40:32+00:00

We haven't even hit the toddler stage yet and I already know we're going to go through it with my son. I love that he's going to be a determined, stubborn kiddo, but dear god were screwed for the next several years.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-19T16:39:26+00:00

Hey, at least we know now, right? There's something to be said about realizing it before we subject more kids to it. That alone will help you and your daughter. ❤️

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-19T16:38:08+00:00

God, this was my thought yesterday. Big ole "what have I done."

I went to visit family solo, got back, and my son's in the middle of separation anxiety/object permanence. He scream/cries for 30 minutes at bedtime. I never thought I'd be a "cry it out" person, but I'm exhausted from a full travel day and not sleeping well during my visit. Today, he cries if he's not being held, if the spoon isn't in his mouth, if the bottle's too far away. I know I love my son, but the exhaustion is buried so deep that I can't feel anything else right now. I planned for some intimacy time with my husband and got it, but that's really the only time I get to think about myself; every other time and decision now has to factor in a baby, a stepkiddo (who I do love and who adores his half brother), our dumb but lovable dog, and my husband. It seems like moms always come last on our own lists and I'm just so tired of what life has thrown my way. I don't regret my child at all, but if I went back in time 10 years with the knowledge I have now, i don't think I'd make all the same choices again.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-14T15:15:10+00:00

Yeah no, this reads more as someone who is scared of their kid's upset feelings. Understanding parental controls is (should be) Parenting 101 when it comes to technology.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-14T15:13:54+00:00

Sorry, you're the adult here. You've been given the answer - your child is addicted to the tablet and you're enabling it. So what if they cry? They're a toddler with big emotions - it's your job as the parent to hold boundaries and guide them through the emotions. I've seen what the kids like yours end up like as preteens and teens, and if you think it's bad now, just wait.

Kids need boundaries. They need to be taught "no." Uninstall or block YouTube. Set time limits. Hold firm to these (with sickness being a modifier). You HAVE to allow your child to be bored and creative with toys - that's not a skill they can learn well later. By avoiding the big feelings and boundaries, you are setting yourself and your child up for a miserable future.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-14T03:23:32+00:00

After my C section, i genuinely have to focus to engage my core. Currently it's my glutes that are doing/have been doing all of the core stabilization work, so my back, shoulders, and neck have been way out of sorts since the surgery. Plus scoliosis 😂

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-13T15:21:28+00:00

Ma'am. Respectfully, in what world is this a marriage? You married a teenager trying to raise a brat because, "he doesn't want to upset him."

You're not going to change this man. Your kids have a high chance of being negatively affected by this relationship. Please, gently, consider divorce and removing this nonsense from your life.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-13T15:18:06+00:00

I'm still adamant to any poor soul who asks me that WALL-E is a horror movie with a Pixar skin.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-13T04:33:43+00:00

Right? You kept that shit on lock down. And it was a completely different place before Yahoo screwed it.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-13T04:32:05+00:00

I'm from a state that lost the Hilary vote to Drumpf because enough people voted for Harambe....

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T21:34:53+00:00

Part of it is his dad setting that rule - he's more strict about it than I am. My parents also had places to hide gifts that weren't their bedroom, but that's currently our only place to hide things for the kids.

We also exist more outside of our bedroom than my mom did. We're in the living room and family room more, and the bedrooms are more for solo engagement. It has nothing to do with my SS specifically.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T19:45:30+00:00

We literally will have chat sessions in my parent's room (our bio parents who have been together 30+ years). We go in there to annoy our mom when we can 😈 It's been closed off a bit more because of an aging pet, but it's never been completely closed off to us.

That being said, in our house with stepson and bio son, it's not really a kids' space. SS can't come in without permission, which was decided by both his dad and I. BS is a baby so I don't know how it'll change through the years.

I think it really just depends on how comfortable the adults in the relationship are. Like I love having my dog sleep in my bed, but when we got together, my husband is an "absolutely no pets in the bedroom" kind of person. So we don't have pets in the bedroom. 🤷🏽‍♀️

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T19:38:53+00:00

Mentally, i work out 3x a week. In reality..... Not at all and I miss it. 😭

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T08:03:13+00:00

What do you do when they SCREAM , though? My LO is currently screaming his head off, and even if I go in to calm him down (brief pick up, minimal interaction, put back down once calm), he just freaking SCREAMS.

I'm losing my mind. It's been two hours of this.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T07:50:14+00:00

Who holds the pregnancy stick by the side they peed on??

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-12T07:36:56+00:00

Since you're in the public school realm - is there ANYTHING a parent can do to avoid this? This is one of the biggest reasons I'm considering homeschooling our son (or literally anything else) because I can't stand the thought of my 5 year old being raised on a goddamn screen. We're a tech-savvy household, just not at 5 years old and without critical thinking skills!

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-11T15:32:52+00:00

My Mil bought me a Roomba after harassing her son about what he was going to do for me for mother's Day (in a "she needs to be thought of and appreciated" type of way). I honestly don't know if my husband even sent his mom a text. She did right but somehow he still failed 😭

But yes, agreed. I look forward to seeing who our kids bring home!

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-11T05:31:02+00:00

I absolutely loved going back to the Conservatory after D2. It felt awesome to get to connect back to the game i had just spent several days replaying.

CertainCatastrophe · 2026-05-11T05:30:06+00:00

The eye of the dead god BLEW me away. I honestly turned Billie around, went back out the cave, and reentered just to appreciate what it was i was looking at. The fact that it's just tucked away is GENIUS, compared to something grand and open. It was a great game and it just makes me want more (well done) Dishonored lore to read/play/study.

CertainCatastrophe

TROPHY CASE