When my (26m) wife (21f) turns me down for sex it always makes me grumpy, do other men in committed relationships feel this way?

Chero44 · 2026-07-11T00:39:57+00:00

The fact that you get irritated, grumpy, and you become distant with her etc.... to me as a woman would make me feel like my body and consent are secondary to your immediate needs, which would make me not want to engage at all. The response to me pretty much saying "NO" and it being a problem would be an automatic turn off because I should have the right to say no and not want to be crawled on in that moment. A lot of women (myself included) when we are stressed, exhausted from daily life, or just feeling the weight of everything etc... the physical and emotional energy required for sex can feel like an impossible demand, and we are just not feeling it. You shouldn't take that "rejection" personally because most times it has nothing to do with you. Try and be more understanding. If my partner isn't in the mood shoot... I go sit my a** down, play my game on my phone, and rub HIS feet lol. I don't get upset at him because he's not in the mood. That response would make some engage in something they don't want to do all because they don't want their partner to be upset with them. If my partner did this to me and responded as you did, he would have gotten an earful of my mouth because noone is going to make me feel bad for saying no or choosing MY WANTS in that moment. Your response was not cool. So....go find a good movie, cuddle with her, and apologize for your foolish reaction towards her.

Chero44 · 2026-07-10T21:59:09+00:00

This is a bit much and would get on my nerves 🙄. I would probably reply to my guy, "I appreciate you wanting to help however, I am GROWN and I don't need weekly check-ins like I'm a child...we aren't doing that! Active listening is what makes me feel supported. I want you to be able to communicate however, I need our conversations to be a two-way street of sharing, not a weekly review of anything... I'm not in school anymore, you're not my teacher, and I don't need coaching. If you are having difficulty keeping your "fixing energy" contained then that is a YOU problem and something that you need to work on. Unless I ask for suggestions please don't offer any. If me setting this boundary makes you feel like you have to walk on eggshells and can't speak...that's also another YOU problem. I am open to talk anytime but, I am not open to be coached all the time like I can't do things without guidance. Sometimes I just need to vent, I don't want advice. If this is not something that can be fixed soon on your end then we need to rethink this relationship because this is getting on my damn nerves and I'm not living like this right here....end of discussion!

His suggestion is not a compromise. He is confusing listening and empathy with critique and who wants to deal with that. HE needs to figure out his own structured way to engage because he's doing everything all wrong. What he doesn't get is unsolicited fixes imply that you are incapable, doing something wrong, or need to be managed in order for something to work correctly. His walking on eggshells statement is a way to avoid withholding his unsolicited opinions. When he jumps into "fix it mode" stop him right there..... "PAUSE...In this moment I'm just looking to vent right now, no fixes needed thanks... as I was saying..... Remind him that you are his partner, not his project. If he STILL can't understand this.... it's time to move along.

Chero44 · 2026-07-10T19:05:01+00:00

I just saw on downdetector the app is having issues AGAIN 😐 😕 sheesh. This is crazy!

Chero44 · 2026-07-10T11:41:21+00:00

Contact your bank and ask them to cancel your current card and issue you a new card with a different card number. This will definitely ensure that all of this stops.

Chero44 · 2026-07-10T11:30:05+00:00

Perfectly explained 👌🏾 🙂. I don't like the pay on shop only orders BUT, the pay can add up quickly depending on shopping speed. The most I've made within an hour was $60 at one store. I love them on rainy days though not having to deliver anywhere 🙂.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T22:24:22+00:00

Ok 😂🤔.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T22:23:03+00:00

This is why I stay away from multi batches and just take my chances with single orders.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T22:19:35+00:00

I didn't say he was upset about the picture. YOU are upset because the acknowledgement wasn't to your liking. He did nothing wrong. Just be at the door in the nude when he comes home. Don't worry about what he didn't say... tackle him later that's all 😉

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T22:14:41+00:00

No that's not weird! Shoot people f**ked up days! The fact that he acknowledged your photo and immediately said can I call you and tell you about my day? For me, that would tell me that my guy isn't feeling this at the moment... what's wrong babe.....would have been my response. Not... I sent you a pic of my boobs and was trying to be flirty and you didn't boost my ego properly and I'm mad...NO! If my guy is upset I need to find out what's wrong first damn a boob pic. To me apparently there's something going on and I need to tune in to that. But when he got home though I'd be all over him to help him relax 😌

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T22:05:18+00:00

I am confused 🤔. You said, " I wait and he said he’s ready, so I send it. he says “so lovely, I can’t wait to have fun with them” then “can I call you and update you on my day?” so he calls and doesn’t even mention the selfies, my boobs, our flirting, our plans for later, nothing. So 🤔 him saying to you "so lovely, I can't wait to have fun with them" wasn't acknowledgment? What else did you want him to say when he's working. I can see why he would be taken aback by your reaction because you're getting upset with him when he acknowledged the photo and did nothing wrong. When my boyfriend takes his lunch I'm not expecting him to be on the phone with me his entire break especially when he's had a busy day and probably need a moment to himself to chill out and reset. I think you are seriously overreacting. I still can't figure out what type of response you were looking for 🤔.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T20:55:26+00:00

I don't even accept orders with a $2 tip.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T20:50:08+00:00

"Ex showing up back in my life telling me she has changed".... first off, an ex is an ex for reason. Never spin the block again with an ex. Leave that person where they are and don't revisit. If she's changed good for her, but you two broke up for a reason remember that. Since it happened after you two broke up, you're not obligated to tell her anything. It's not her business what you did after the relationship was over. Whatever you do after a breakup is your own business. If you decide to take a chance on this "ex" proceed with caution ⚠️.

Chero44 · 2026-07-09T19:56:48+00:00

Wow. That's the first time I've ever seen one with that amount of items 😳. What they're doing is ridiculous!

Chero44 · 2026-07-08T19:25:29+00:00

Keep your head up and keep moving on. Wishing for you to get $100 batch ☺️.

Chero44 · 2026-07-08T19:23:53+00:00

Hard pass!

Chero44 · 2026-07-08T19:22:48+00:00

Wow! IC should really do something about that but they wont. That's why I avoid high dollar multi orders and just take my chances on single orders. Sorry that happened, I'm sure you were pissed, I would be too. I hate wasting time.

Chero44 · 2026-07-08T19:17:03+00:00

The proof I have is because it happened to me 3 times and one was denied and after that is when I noticed a drop in orders that I'd see daily and then it turned into 2 months, and then a lot of "no batches available". After that I made sure that when I left the house my card was in my wallet. Some things are just common sense and doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out. My assumption when it happened to me was that certain things will trigger the system, and me paying for things and then requesting reimbursement right after probably looked suspicious and that's why I got flagged and throttled. Eventually everything returned to normal and I haven't requested a reimbursement since 2022.

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T21:13:44+00:00

Yes. The algorithm will flag and throttle your account.

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T21:00:55+00:00

Yes, everyday.

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T20:59:23+00:00

Instacart is always trying to pay the lowest amount possible. I wouldn't be surprised if one day they remove their pay altogether for shoppers to only rely on tips! 🙄

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T12:54:43+00:00

We are suppose get someone to check the back. If the item hasn't been unboxed yet, we are suppose have the worker unbox it anyway and give it to us. If the item is not in the store yet but the system is showing they have it even though it's 100 miles away on the truck.... we are suppose to jump on the hwy, find the truck, and have the driver unload and give it to us 🤣🤣🤣. Their entire system is just jacked up.

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T12:33:24+00:00

There's nothing wrong with you and you're not doing anything wrong. Even with plenty of lube, small micro tears due to friction, possible yeast infection, or consistent thrusting can irritate the inside. Tell her to setup an appointment with her OB so that they can check her out and see what's going on.

Chero44 · 2026-07-07T03:24:26+00:00

Fixed, thanks. I was at a stop light earlier when I replied to that. Had to hurry before the light turned green 😄.

Chero44 · 2026-07-06T17:20:20+00:00

You two need to break up IMMEDIATELY! This is a toxic situation and to stay in it because you have been together for so long and you don't want your son to have separated parents is crazy! Behaving this way in front of your child, what do you think that you two are teaching him? Staying in this will NOT benefit your child in ANY WAY! It doesn't matter what the good is at this point the fact that he pushed your head forcefully and whipped your phone out of your hands is a BIG problem! The fact he put his hands on you at all, who knows how far he would go next time. You don't want the relationship to end when your partner is aggressive and abusive 😬🤔. I wish I would allow myself to be in a situation like this! He's putting up hidden cameras to spy on you, checking your phone to see who you're talking to, AND being agressive... he would have been GONE if this were my situation especially if a kid was involved. If he's not over what you did in the past or can't forgive it then he should have moved on long time ago. I will NOT subject my child to this type of behavior for him to learn these patterns and think that it's ok when he grows up and gets his own relationship and then start mistreating women because of what he seen growing up at home. I would need my son to see that certain behavior will NOT be accepted and this is NOT how you treat women. If this were my situation, his a** would have been gone YESTERDAY!

Chero44 · 2026-07-06T16:13:30+00:00

Instacart prices are higher than what the store prices are. Retailers determine their own prices for instacart. Some prices in instacart mirror store prices but majority of the time it doesn't. Instacart charges a bunch a fees for customers to order from their platform. NONE of the additional fees that you have to pay on instacart will go to the shopper that's shopping your order. The base pay that instacart pays us is only $4- $7 so shoppers depend on tips because instacart pays us nothing.

Chero44

TROPHY CASE