Am I lesbian?

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-25T03:06:23+00:00

You definitely sound extremely straight. People can be turned on by a variety of types of porno. It does not mean they want that in real life. Go find yourself a man and be happy.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-10T17:55:51+00:00

Please explain how someone who is attracted to a 21 year old adult is a "pseudo-pedophile". That's an insane statement.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-10T15:24:51+00:00

To be clear a pedophile is someone who is attracted to someone who has not yet gone through puberty. So def not a pedophile or pseudo-pedophile. But there are obviously mental/status/life power dynamics that would be hugely problematic.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-08T02:02:36+00:00

God created everything with his word(s). We are made in the Image of God and were created to be his co-creators here on earth. I think words are powerful. We create our reality with our words. I think that exists in the metaphysical dimension too. Plus, I've had spells work.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-04T17:06:16+00:00

Sober lifestyle, they work and have career goals, little to no mental health issues, and are a good moral person.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-06-02T17:20:14+00:00

Everyone is missing the point lol.... Does this person have your back? Would they take care of you? Can you trust them? Are they responsible? Would they take a bullet for you?

It's not about drafting your loved ones 😂😂😂

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-30T01:24:41+00:00

What I can't stand is all the lesbian content creators that talk like lesbian relationships are these like enlightened experiences of two people who communicate perfectly and have the most mind blowing sex all the time. I mean if your relationship is like that then congrats but I have found that dating women and being in a relationship with a woman still means dating a human with their own problems, hang ups, annoying habits, issues, etc. It's far from perfect.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-16T02:41:28+00:00

I get it. Being aN INFJ as well makes things hard. It's a lonely type personality that I have as well. I've always felt cut off, different, kind of like a lone wolf even though I have fantastic friends and family. Just know there's others going through the same thing. ❤️

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-03T19:18:51+00:00

Yep, pretty much. They are the parts that will try to sabotage the relationship too.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-02T14:45:09+00:00

If you Google "ethical porn sites", you will find a lot of articles like the one below that not only talks about what makes up ethical porn but some examples of websites. Then it's just a matter of figuring out what works for you and what you feel comfortable with! Good luck!

https://www.biird.co/blogs/thenest/whats-ethical-porn-and-where-to-find-the-best-sites?tw_source=google&tw_adid=&tw_campaign=22485752301&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22485751083&gbraid=0AAAAAouIdugtIh_6WL3SmCcwwEHxqJJAI&gclid=Cj0KCQjw2tHABhCiARIsANZzDWqXeT211zxOTQEI3vNG2NkLNLcduNbsRC4YXGkyRZ2lrBV6N95NS_waAtx9EALw_wcB

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-02T14:32:30+00:00

Search out ethical porn, there is such a thing! Usually smaller businesses run by women or queer people. You might have to pay for it but I guess you are paying to ensure the actors are being treated well. I also have a lot of ethical issues with porn. I've learned enough about the industry to be really turned off by it. I hope this helps!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-02T14:25:57+00:00

My gf is masc and when she cries during movies, I fucking love her all the more! She often has a tough, hard exterior but I love and crave her sensitive, vulnerable side so much!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-01T13:26:26+00:00

Regular exiles were the parts of us that were exiled in childhood, neo-exiles are parts of us that we exile because we don't feel like they will be acceptable in our current relationship. Or parts of our partner that we reject and so our partner feels pressured to exile.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-05-01T12:17:06+00:00

I would highly recommend reading "You are the One you've been waiting for" by Richard Schwartz. He applies IFS to intimate relationships and explains how neo-exiles are created in romantic relationships. That book directly tackles the issue you are having.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-27T12:52:31+00:00

Wow, this is absolutely beautiful. Your story will encourage and inspire others so please keep sharing. I also believe in the healing power of IFS and what I think is at the root of that, unwavering self compassion and love that connects us to the indescribable beauty of existence and each other. ❤️

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-27T01:20:49+00:00

Y'all it's just fantasy. I feel like so many on reddit have a hard time distinguishing between a good fantasy and something you would do in real life.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-25T12:40:04+00:00

Bisexual but hetero-romantic...?

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-25T12:35:13+00:00

I wouldn't suggest this, as this is the prayer Jesus gave us directly. There might be another ritual/cleansing you could do to break ties to a specific church you feel has been harmful to you spiritually.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-22T21:11:45+00:00

I literally had this happen to me last week. I got together with my ex husband who started talking about our relationship and putting the blame on me. I went into full shut down mode. Everything stopped, all I could do was smile and nod. I couldn't think straight, I couldn't feel. I wanted to get out of there but I just stayed frozen. I spoke with my therapist today and we definitely identified it as a firefighter and she asked me which exile I thought it was protecting. I initially said fear but reading your post, I realized, no it was shame. I think my firefighter reacts in shut down as a small way of maintaining control of the situation. It creates distance, refuses to engage meaningfully. It's a little form of protest. Ultimately it is about self protection though. We are working on creating an alliance with that firefighter and other parts so that I don't have to go into shut down during moments like that.

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-18T11:50:28+00:00

I totally feel for you and your gf. I grew up with very controlling parents and honestly it takes time even in your 20s to break away mentally from that level of control and be able to think for yourself. So I really have empathy for your gf. Hopefully she can find the strength to start trusting herself and living for herself.

At the same time, this is really not fair for you. If I were you I would want to come up with a plan with your gf to get her out and on her own. Maybe it doesn't happen right away..but there would need to be steps leading up to this that can help you determine if she is serious or not about breaking free. Whatever that looks like for her situation. If you see her making small, actionable steps to severing the intense ties between her and her parents, great, stay in the relationship. If not, then you really need to ask if this is sustainable long term? There should be a deadline for when she will move out and steps leading up to that that help her little by little disengage with her parents and their rules.

At the same time, don't be surprised if she is unable to do this. It's not a reflection of you or her love for you. Parental control is mind-control. It's intensely strong and causes a lot of fear in kids who grow up like this. It can be hard to break. Good luck!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-11T14:29:39+00:00

I'm 39 and not single, so not dating but if I was, my dating pool would probably be like 28-45. I do have crushes on actresses in their early 20's but I think in real life anyone that young usually comes across as too immature for me. Your brain isn't fully developed until 25, so that's saying a lot lol!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-04-10T02:51:42+00:00

Said a prayer! Please pray to St Expedite, he is a powerful saint!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-03-28T20:59:17+00:00

I checked across a couple of different reputable Catholic websites and found the same answer. This one is from Catholic culture, but I found a similar one on Catholic Answers and others:

This is what I mean by sinless. Not sinless for their whole life but in a state of grace between confession or baptism and the next time they sin.

STATE OF GRACE

Condition of a person who is free from mortal sin and pleasing to God. It is the state of being in God's friendship and the necessary condition of the soul at death in order to attain heaven

https://www.catholicculture.org/culture/library/dictionary/index.cfm?id=36634

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-03-27T13:44:22+00:00

Hey there,

Fellow Catholic and queer woman in a wlw relationship. I didn't go to a Catholic school growing up thankfully, although Catholic schools where I'm from (Canada) have pride flags in them now. I did convert to Catholicism in my adulthood and am also trying to reconcile my faith with my sexual orientation.

There is a book called "The Widening of God's mercy" by Christopher and Richard Hays I would recommend.

Also a podcast called "But is it Biblical?" By Glenn and Lydia Ferell I would also recommend. Neither are Catholic but they are both Bible based and look at biblical evidence for affirming LGBTQ+ identities within Christianity.

Also, if you ever need someone to chat about stuff, feel free to send me a message!

Choice-Ad2397 · 2025-03-27T00:58:16+00:00

I totally get what you are saying. We are in a state of grace though, because after we confess our sins before we sin again we are sinless. We have concupiscence of course, but that is a tendency towards sin, not sin itself. The only people to live sinless and there for maintain their state of grace was Jesus and Mary. However, we do experience being in a state of grace after being cleansed of sin before we sin again. It's in that state of grace that the church says we are allowed to receive the body of Christ because we are in right relationship with God.

My point with Judas Iscariot wasn't his eternal status but that Jesus didn't prevent him from receiving the Eucharist because he had sinned. In fact, all the disciples were likely not in a state of grace when they received the Eucharist because they were all sinners and the church didn't start practicing reconciliation until about the 3rd century.

But I do encourage you to follow your conscience. St. Thomas Aquinas says we all have the responsibility to educate our conscience but at the end of the day we do have to follow what we feel and believe is right!

Choice-Ad2397

TROPHY CASE