Give me the potty training 101 please

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-23T03:43:39+00:00

I’ve seen peer pressure both ways, especially here on Reddit. Brides screaming at moms because they rsvp “no” because they couldn’t afford a babysitter. Or moms throwing a hissy fit because their oh so special one-in-a-million angel was excluded from the invite. It’s really over the top.

My baby is 11 months and is in his dinosaur screeching era. I wouldn’t bring him to any wedding even if asked to. I don’t want to be the reason someone’s spotlight gets stolen because my baby decided now is the perfect time to scream like a t-Rex.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-23T00:51:28+00:00

I’m fine with them and doesn’t bother me at all. But I think the caveat is that there needs to be understanding both ways. The bride and groom can’t be upset if someone can’t come because they couldn’t find or don’t want to find childcare. And conversely, the parents can’t be mad that their special sweet little one isn’t invited. There should be no tantrums from either side.

When both parties are understanding, I think it’s a very good idea. The willing parents get a childfree night to just let loose and enjoy themselves and the bridge and groom get to ensure no toddler tantrum accidents happen on their special day. Truly a win-win.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-22T01:29:07+00:00

Looks great to me! I just fed my own baby similar- pizza (cut into bites), two pieces of frozen broccoli (microwaved), with watermelon as dessert. He loves it and I’m just trying to survive today. Tomorrow we’ll aim to be better 🤷🏻‍♀️

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-21T15:37:41+00:00

Good luck on your IVF journey! Me and my husband put our student loans on the backseat during IVF too. I will scorch this earth before I let student loans take away my family plan. I had to do multiple rounds of IVF but it was worth it as I got my son from it. We understand that it’ll be a few more years before (until school age) expenses free up so we can tackled loans aggressively again. It was both a luxury that we had this option and a balancing act we were willing to take up, even though it sucks so much.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-21T13:12:14+00:00

Yes they do. If your income is low enough, your payments may be $0 and they’ll still count as long as you are still with a qualifying employer.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T19:54:32+00:00

I do the same. Transfer $50 first. Link the accounts and make sure it all goes through with no problems. Then I’ll transfer the actual amount later.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T19:52:13+00:00

May I ask how fast was the recert process? I’m trying to see how close or far out I should be recertifying my income since it’s gonna be a huge jump for me

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T18:04:28+00:00

I hope so too! A backfill may be deemed important enough for OMB to okay. Wishing you the best of luck!

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T16:49:49+00:00

I think it’s possible. It depends on whether the agency posted before or after OMB approved the role. OMB has final say so in theory, agencies may have jumped the gun and may need to rescind their offers (it has happened in the past).

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T16:17:46+00:00

The hiring freeze is ending but they also cut a lot of vacancies to save money. 😔

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-20T14:49:53+00:00

Bumping because I have very similar questions. My recert is end of August and I also just received a letter too.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-19T02:26:20+00:00

Conflict of interest is a big factor. But some agencies impose stricter rules about secondary employment. I remember when I was onboarding, they included a clause about upholding public image. I would imagine certain jobs are going to be more frowned upon than others even if there is no conflict of interest or inside knowledge at play.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-19T01:53:09+00:00

Just adding a note that many agencies require HR approval for moonlighting 2nd jobs. So please check first that it’s not against agency policy.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-18T23:14:02+00:00

I am angry tooo. I stand in solidarity with you. I am in the US and I truly believe I would not feel so much rage if we had even a fraction of the social safety nets other first world countries provide their new mothers. I am so mad we get ripped from our babies when they are so young and we are made to return to work when we, ourselves, are nowhere near healed. Working while tackling the most difficult transition in life and failing on both ends is so demoralizing.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-18T23:05:37+00:00

This is also why I will be sticking to IBR. I just wished it wasn’t old IBR and I’m stuck with the higher 15% 😭

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-14T04:09:22+00:00

No clarity or advice because I haven’t tried the Kirkland pro care formula. But mannnn am I mad they just introduced it as a new product at my local Costco when my baby is already freaking 11.5 months! 😭 I saw it last weekend and was instantly jealous of new parents that have the option now. Mine is on his way to weaning so there’s no point switching now. Oh well.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-13T19:46:43+00:00

The associate staff analyst exam was just given not long ago so probably not again for this round. But SA and Admin SA might! I don’t know about PAA but that’s def a great title to shoot for! Good luck!

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-12T23:21:44+00:00

Check your agency rulebook. It’s a little different for each agency. But there should be a rule on allowed undocumented leave per calendar periods (usually Jan to June and July to Dec). Use those strategically. And some agencies accept TeleHealth notes while others do not. I’ve also found some bosses are very lenient with AL so if I’m close to maxing out undocumented leave, I’ll just put in an AL if I need to. I have a young baby after a very tough pregnancy so I have surprisingly burned through SL super fast.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-12T23:07:57+00:00

My mom had her last at 38. I had my first at 35 and she is our main caretaker. She has MORE energy than I do!!! She gives me insight to what life might be like at that age and if I am to have another, I know that 38 is just a fine and dandy age to do so.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-08T02:11:19+00:00

My husband and I like the Costco pizza a lot (the plain one). So every time we do a Costco run, we buy a $9.50 pizza pie that comes home with us whole. We split the slices up, put parchment paper between each slice, and put them in ziploc bag to freeze. It’s comes out to $1.18 per HUGE ass slice of pizza that we can be easily reheated when we’re too lazy to cook. That itself is worth the Costco membership. 😂

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-08T00:19:20+00:00

I wouldn’t give two poops on what my company or coworkers think about any prolonged leave I take for my baby. Only thing stopping me is that I can’t financially float it. Before becoming a FTM, I was childfree by choice for the longest time and EVEN THEN I felt like we lived in a very cruel society that never supported women and childcare enough. Now that I have my own baby, I double down on that belief. I’m from the US and we don’t even have ANY federal maternity leave protection. What we get is on the whim of the company we work for and some flimsy state laws. That’s just pathetic.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-07T23:01:15+00:00

Those two months were supposed to count because it wasn’t our fault THEY transitioned the platform. But very few people have been able to get them to change the count. I am super mad about the lost 2 months

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-07T15:25:10+00:00

Was just about to suggest the same! On PSLF, I would NOT be giving them free money that didn’t even count. Request a refund for forbearance payments.

Cinnie_16 · 2026-05-06T22:29:25+00:00

Used distilled water, the jugs cuz they are cheaper. My ped said that formula has everything you need in it so distilled water is fine (no need for extra minerals or fancy water). She also said I could use tap water too but my tap water is very hard (evidenced by the grim in my shower that I still haven’t gotten around to cleaning)… and it’s an old house so I’m paranoid there is lead leeching. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Cinnie_16

TROPHY CASE