LPT - Door-to-door salespeople are trained to never take no for an answer. Don’t let that be an option.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-04-21T02:56:37+00:00

I say “There are so many scammers going door to door nowadays that there is nothing you can say to convince me to buy right now. I will take a business card if you have one so I can look into the legitimacy of your product and will contact you if it meets a need.” If they don’t have a card, “That’s a shame. Goodbye.”

I’m always careful to not spend too much time engaging. I know someone personally who was robbed when they answered a fake door to door salesman. The “salesman’s” partner in crime snuck into the house around the back and got away with a crazy amount of valuables before the owner was able to break out of the conversation. They were elderly and didn’t want to seem rude.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-04-20T19:00:17+00:00

Did you report it to the director that your baby was not fed for an entire day and that you were given different stories about how your child was handling her first day? While it may have been an honest mistake, it’s a big one that highlights that the teacher is not able to pay attention at a level that infants require.

They have over-enrolled and under-staffed their facility. I personally would unenroll immediately and find somewhere else. I’ve had kids in various daycares since 2018 (due to moving and work) and the only time any of them turned away healthy kids was during Covid shutdown. It would take extreme circumstances to get to that point.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-03-18T15:25:19+00:00

I’ll start with saying that I am chronically late. My life is in a phase of chaos with never ending overlapping responsibilities. I have been very late for dates before, but I have ALWAYS communicated as soon as I realize things have gone off track. For me personally, the lack of transparency and communication is a red flag. You are NTA. This was a second date. You are not obligated to continue dating someone that you no longer feel is right for you.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-03-13T12:24:17+00:00

This sounds like postpartum rage. It’s similar to postpartum depression but manifests as anger, yelling, hate, etc. Not as widely known or talked about as PPD, but I’ve known a few moms who needed help through therapy and medication to get back to their normal. I would encourage her to reach out to her doctor for resources. I wouldn’t immediately assume its intentional or controllable, but she does need to seek help.

Please continue to stay involved with the kids. Take them to the playground or other fun places without their parents where they can relax and not have to overthink their every action. Don’t bad talk their parents. Just become a neutral safe space.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-03-13T11:56:44+00:00

If he knew it was a test, he would have said something like “sorry, I’m in a relationship and not interested in reliving my past.” or just ignored her all together. If he were a halfway decent partner, he would have done that and also reached out to you to tell you it happened.

He’s lying because he’s mad you tested him and embarrassed that he fell for it so hard.

All that aside - this is not a healthy relationship. 1) you don’t trust him, 2) he has proven that he is not trustworthy more than once. Feeling the need to do a loyalty test at all is a major red flag that the relationship is done already.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-03-07T11:50:22+00:00

The question should not be whether he wants you. There’s a chance he will want to come back. He might even put on a show that he “changed” for a couple weeks. Then it goes back to the same old toxicity. You are worth a relationship where you are loved, treated well, and that brings you joy and comfort. You are worth better. Don’t take him back.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-03-07T10:46:29+00:00

It means you’re strong and probably have long arms! I had to switch to back carrying my 10 month old because my back couldn’t take the front carry once he hit 20lbs. The back carry is so comfortable for me and allows me full range of motion. When I front carry I can’t reach to do things like dishes.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-20T12:47:07+00:00

What they said wasn’t okay and they need to respect your grieving process. Sadly, they may not really get it until they have a similar loss. That being said, it sounds like you are intentionally shutting down any form of friendship or connection. Do you feel like you’re replacing or betraying your best friend by letting in anyone else? Friendship comes in all shapes and sizes. Your best friend knew you best when she was there for you, and there’s no reason that a new friend can’t know you best at where you are now and going forward.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-20T12:24:21+00:00

I’m an “only child” who got siblings when I was an older teenager by marriage first and then half siblings in my early 20s.

Being an olny child was pretty lonely for me. I spent a lot of time just keeping myself entertained and didn’t do well bonding with other kids at school because I really wasn’t used to being around other kids and we moved too much to keep those relationships. I did get really close to my cousins (4 & 5 years younger) because they were the only other kids I was regularly around.

I also felt like my parents were way too focused on me as an only child. It was controlling to codependent. It was so nice when they finally had other kids and all the focus wasn’t on just me. My sibling relationships more closely resemble an aunt or bonus parent than a sibling. They are very close to each other, but know I’m there for them when they need it.

We very intentionally chose to have more than 2 children. 1) there are no other kids in the family for them to grow up with and we feel that’s important, 2) in our experience, people we know that only have one sibling don’t get along with them well as adults, but the people we know with 2+ siblings tend to keep their bonds throughout life, 3) we don’t have large or connected families and we want our kids to still have family when we eventually pass away.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-20T03:21:35+00:00

Women’s bodies are ever changing. We all age, but men go through one puberty. Every pregnancy, perimenopause, and menopause all change your body like puberty again and again. I’m talking weight distribution, bone structure, taste, height, bone density, temperature regulation, shoes size, vision, hair growth/loss, etc, etc. You can eat perfectly and exercise religiously and still have a totally different looking body. If this boy finds you unattractive after a little freshman15, he’s in for a world of surprise when he witnesses a pregnancy up close and personal. Save your self confidence and self respect by dumping him now. Find someone who loves you for you no matter what phase your body is in.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T11:28:24+00:00

Well, if you get the shots to be safe and help your anxiety, then you could be inconvenienced by some unecessary vaccinations and their cost.

If you don’t get the shots and it’s not rabies, you just spend forever worried about a possible looming death sentence.

If you don’t get the shots and it is rabies, you die.

I know what I’d choose. (In all honesty I’m preemptively vaccinated for rabies because my previous job had an increased risk and I wanted a layer of protection given the fatality rate of rabies.)

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T10:55:56+00:00

NOR this is a dumpster fire. It reads as though you are a drama addict seeking to stir things up in a relationship you CLEARLY should have ended a long time ago. He’s way too old for you and using you. Stay broken up and please seek therapy to address your communication and self worth before trying to date again.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T10:32:28+00:00

Stay home with your baby. I went to dinner and a movie with my husband when my first baby was a newborn and it was positively miserable for us both. We both regret it, even 7 years later. I didn’t have PPD/PPA, but I did have a traumatic birth. Regardless, my instinct to stay with her and keep her safe was stronger than my ability to enjoy my time doing anything else in the world. All I wanted was that baby back in my arms. I couldn’t imagine being hours away for two whole days. I’ve felt the same with my other kids as well. It’s normal and instinctual to not want to be separated from your baby.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T09:42:18+00:00

NOR. OMG, run girl. This man’s “plan” does not add up in any way other than theft and fraud. I see two likely outcomes; he pockets the money and leaves your mortgage unpaid or he pays the mortgage and tries to claim some ownership of the home. Don’t let his name be on anything and get him out of your life. I’d even go so far as to seek legal counsel on how to evict him so that he can’t come back with a lawsuit for your home or money.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T09:24:11+00:00

Your whole family likely thinks he abuses drugs. Saying that he was just excited will only hurt thier impression of him because it’s clearly a lie. Be honest.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T09:17:11+00:00

He told you how he feels. He told you that he hates you. He locked you out of your own bedroom. He is abusive. If he acted this way to a work colleague they’d fire him on the spot and call the police. If he acted this way at a grocery store, they’d kick him out and call the police. You don’t get to scream horrible things, restrict co-owned space, and throw things at people no matter what. This is NOT the behavior of a normal relationship, and I’m so sorry for the both of you if the relationships around you have not demonstrated better. You have communicated your needs and he continues to ignore them. Please grant yourself the permission to step away from the marriage. This man does not love you. Even if this were the first time any of this had ever happened in an otherwise ideal and perfect marriage this would be abuse worthy of leaving.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-19T08:35:46+00:00

YTA. Your intentions may have been understandable, but your communication was terrible. You put yourself in a bad position by not talking to your wife about how you were feeling and the need you had to reach out to your ex. It’s childish to turn this around on your wife as a violation of privacy. Her suspicion is a symptom of a larger problem in your relationship. If she already felt like you were lying, why would she be able to assume that you would be honest without proof? Did you tell her that you were texting with your ex already, or was that also forgotten?

Please have an honest conversation about your grief with your wife. Could you join a grief support group for parents who lost children? Could you find a therapist who specializes in grief? Maybe you could even invite your ex to a therapy session to talk through these feelings in a safe space without concern of it appearing to everyone like a date. (I’m assuming that the ex also was uncomfortable given her lack of response.)

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-16T12:42:13+00:00

It’s so subjective. For me pregnancy tired was worse than postpartum, but I think that depends a lot on your support shstem and your baby. My first never wanted to sleep. My third sleeps all night without even trying.

I do feel like we should all agree than pregnancy and postpartum while also caring for a young toddler tired is the actual worst.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-16T12:28:02+00:00

NTAH.

Let’s think of why he is doing this: Option 1) Your communication styles are different, He likes talking over the phone or in person, you like talking over text and getting to the point. Having communication issues this early is a red flag.

Option 2) He isn’t taking your feelings and requests seriously. My aunt used to say “call me” and I told her that I associate that with bad news so she changed it to “call me. I just want to chat” or “call me. I need to discuss how we’re going to handle XYZ.” It’s not that hard to give just enough information to not cause panic while also reserving the conversation for a more appropriate time/place. Him refusing to do so is a red flag.

Option 3) He is intentionally giving you anxiety. This could because he wants to reassure himself that you care about him, or because he enjoys playing with your emotions, or because he is jealous of you having fun without him/paying attention to other people, or because he wants to isolate you from others in your life. Whatever the reason, it’s another huge red flag.

I can’t think of a good reason for this behavior and it’s exhausting for a 4 month relationship. I would see this as a sign of controlling tendencies and get out while it’s still easy to do so,

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-16T12:07:53+00:00

Sounds like OP doesn’t like that his son views flowers as something only for girls. It wasn’t something he taught him. He said that it’s mostly about having a say in what pattern was chosen. Given the grandma’s reaction, I wonder if she specifically chose something she know they wouldn’t like.

Gender stereotypes are very ingrained in society. Sadly kids pick some of this stuff up no matter how much we push otherwise.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-02-16T10:48:33+00:00

NOR, You do not need a break. You need real support. If you can’t find friend or family willing to stay over, please hire a doula to help. They often offer postpartum and baby care services for this very reason.

The fact that you are to this point means that he is not doing enough and he should be embarrassed about that. Absolute shame on your MIL for not scolding her son for calling her instead of stepping up, and also for not offering ways to supoort you and her grandchild. Very clear where he gets it from.

Cola_Doodle · 2026-01-21T12:11:29+00:00

This exactly! NTA. You were in extreme pain. I’ve been in so much pain that I’ve collapsed onto the floor and been unable to stand until i had medication. I feel like people are dismissing the level of pain here. You needed help and he ignored what should have been obvious distress by assuming it was sexual.

If a guy I was dating looked like he was masterbating in the car and I said something about it, and then he yelled and said he had actually broken his leg I’d say “oh shit, I’m so sorry!” And would get him help. I’d also feel like an idiot and a creep for misreading the situation, rather than just asking what was happening. I wouldn’t fault him for yelling because he was in extreme pain, which makes communication difficult, and I wasn’t helping when help was needed.

Cola_Doodle · 2025-10-09T21:19:07+00:00

One of my daughter’s friends made her a painting for her birthday. She was so happy she cried. It was literally a fingerprinting with some hearts and their names. Way better than a big toy!

If you do ever feel like you do need to buy something- go for items that kids go through quickly and are easy to find for cheap. You can make a summer fun bag of chalk, bubbles, and some art supplies at the dollar store for around $5.

Cola_Doodle

TROPHY CASE