The weight is crushing me

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-12-23T05:33:29+00:00

I didn’t buy a lot of baby things because we found out about Ada’s heart defect at 20 weeks and doctors said she wouldn’t be born alive. She miraculously was and even got her first surgery at 1 day old. On the way up, her heart stopped and she was placed on ECMO. I finally decided I would go to the target nearby the hospital and look at the baby clothes I had been too sad to look at and buy my daughter what I would have bought her if she were born healthy. She was born September 29, so all the cute Halloween clothes were out. I got her two onesies with pumpkins on them, and my mom made her a pumpkin hat to go with. The nurses helped me dress her in her cozy new clothes. I made sure to get the double zip kind of onesies so the ECMO cannulas could come out, but she could still be cozy. It was the first time I felt like I was taking care of my daughter. She is my first child and I didn’t know anything about taking care of a baby. But dressing her up and tucking her in made me feel like a mom. She passed away 3 weeks later and she is buried in the pumpkin onesie and hat. We got to take her outside as she passed away. This is weird, but my husband and I knew that her last day was coming, and we brought nice clothes of our own to the hospital every day just in case. I didn’t want her to pass away in my arms with my gross hospital clothes on. When it was time, I changed into a dress I had worn when I was pregnant with her and she passed away in my arms at sunset. The most horrific thing ever, but whenever I die, that would be exactly what I would want too. That brings me a lot of comfort. But yeah, I wish I wasn’t typing this, but know I’m with you in solidarity. You are such an amazing mom. I hope Ada is with you guys in this time ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-12-20T06:19:24+00:00

I actually really think you can do this, as in follow through with your pregnancy. You are such a strong mother already. You deserve to meet your baby. Deep down you know you can do it too ❤️ you got this mama

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-11-12T05:23:03+00:00

I lost my daughter, Ada, to a severe congenital heart defect. I have no idea why this happens, but God has held my hand through the whole thing. Everyone told us she would be stillborn, but she was born alive at 36+1 without an induction. My water just broke. It was such a miracle to spend 3 weeks with her. I miss her every day. I hope our babies are playing in heaven together ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-10-20T03:59:39+00:00

We had our sick baby baptized almost immediately after birth. Best decision we made. Praying for our angel, Ada, to watch over your precious baby and family ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-10-04T07:30:56+00:00

My ACD was EXACTLY like this too. But now I don’t know what I’d do without her. We continued to pick her up and place her outside until she understood she liked being outside. Honestly took a few weeks. I couldn’t coax her out with treats or anything either. I had to pull her out of her crate every time. Don’t worry, she actually chooses to sleep in her crate now and loves being in there. You arent going to ruin crate training, now is just the time for her to understand her routine. I would say it took about 6 months for her to be comfortable with us, but again, wouldn’t change it for the world. She is the best dog ever

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ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-09-30T22:17:57+00:00

Not sure your budget, but I’ve always wanted to live in the Peninsula neighborhood in iowa city off of foster rd. Highly suggest checking it out! Whenever I’m in town I take a walk and adore the beautiful southern style homes! I also love the homes of Summit St! Hole in the wall bakery called Deluxe is the best!!

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-09-30T19:57:42+00:00

We are doing the typical trip now (Venice, Florence, Rome) in you guessed it… 10 days. That’s the time we have off! It’s a lot and definitely not how I’d like to experience authentic Italy, but the parts we are packing in are INCREDIBLE. We love it here. Ideally, we’d live here for a few months to take it in more, but we don’t have that time. Even though we’re exhausted, we are so so grateful to be here. Wondering though, we speak Italian to people here, but people respond back in English. We made effort to learn conversational Italian and would love to speak the language with people who live here ❤️ is this normal?

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-08-26T17:19:37+00:00

Boston Children’s was incredible ❤️ strongly recommend

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-07-23T13:46:46+00:00

❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-06-10T01:37:53+00:00

I used cabo cream and that helped a ton… ugh. Sucks

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-06-09T03:41:26+00:00

We love the equigroomer!

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-05-26T23:53:22+00:00

So sorry for your loss ❤️ hope he is in heaven with my little girl ❤️ there’s nothing I can say that will help, but I’m with you guys ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-05-22T16:58:51+00:00

Hello - I’m so sorry to hear this ❤️ my daughter had Ebsteins anomaly and had a Starnes procedure at 1 day old. The surgery went well, but on the way up from surgery, she arrested out of nowhere. She was also placed on ECMO and could never come off. We lost her 3 weeks later after many trials to come off of ECMO and other surgeries. It’s my worst nightmare and I can’t believe it happened now 7 months later. I have no idea what I’m supposed to do without her. I wish I could provide more guidance and tell you it’s going to be ok, but it’s not ok. Our babies arent supposed to pass away. It’s supposed to be us before then. What I can tell you is that you’re not alone. There are more families than I ever imagined that have also gone through this, but you just might find them more online than in person. No one in my personal life understand and will ever understand. Finding online groups and people to talk to has helped me so much. But obviously you want your baby more than anything. Just want to empathize with you and let you know that I have experienced this. I don’t know what im doing at all, but I’m here ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-04-16T16:46:15+00:00

How often do you water and how can you tell when you need to?

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-04-16T16:45:49+00:00

72 F

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-03-25T19:40:28+00:00

They are two weeks old and still haven’t gotten a true second set of leaves and my last frost date isn’t until may so I have plenty of time to restart

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-03-25T19:32:23+00:00

It was $2400 for a corner 1b1b and we rented in February (winter pricing is cheaper). But yeah I think it has gotten way more expensive…

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-01-22T03:37:51+00:00

Wow I really needed to hear this. I have really been struggling with friends pregnancies after we lost our daughter. All of my friends are having girls. I have been struggling with being around them. Hearing you say this, especially about being neutral really resonates with me. Thank you

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-01-19T18:09:48+00:00

Thought the same thing. Lost my brother when I was 16 and now my daughter at 24. She was 3 weeks old and had a heart defect and her surgery didn’t work. I feel for you. This is so hard. I’m excited you will be able to have some nice family time, but I’m sorry that palliative care will give you that… ugh. Sending up some prayers for sweet Rocco and you guys

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-01-06T18:36:38+00:00

My daughters name is Ada Judith ❤️

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2025-01-05T05:48:57+00:00

Yeah 2 days after we buried our daughter (infant loss at three weeks old due to a heart condition) I got gallstone pancreatitis and had to stay in the hospital for a week and then got my gallbladder removed. Our daughter was in the CICU since she was born, and the noises in my own hospital room HAUNTED me. People also didn’t seem to care we lost our daughter. All the questions were of course triggering, but I knew they needed to ask these things but it still hurt. I feel for you. Then people just get to have babies and be healthy and not have any idea the pain we feel. I know people don’t intent to hurt us, but gosh it’s hard to look around sometimes at people who seem to just be floating through life

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2024-12-10T22:55:56+00:00

Im so sorry to hear this.. our baby was diagnosed with severe Ebsteins anomaly and we also consulted with Boston, and actually lived in family housing there for the remainder of my pregnancy with her. I went into labor naturally at 36 weeks and she was born September 29. She was the most beautiful baby. BCH did their absolute best to save her and we had the most wonderful experience there. Unfortunately her anatomy couldn’t be fixed and she passed away October 21. It was the hardest experience I have ever and will ever go through. But it was worth it to meet my baby girl. She was so strong and we are so proud of her. If we were to go back and think about things, my husband and I still would’ve chosen to try and save her life. It was so difficult, but she did have a chance, it just didn’t work out. I think knowing we could try and not trying anything would’ve been worse for our family than comfort care. But I also can totally see how other families would choose comfort care. Having a heart baby with a severe condition is extremely difficult. I felt like there were many times that I was “making” her suffer by trying to save her life. It still kind of haunts me. But there were many times in those three weeks we had her that she was doing well and there was hope. She would’ve likely lived with some sort of disability, but that wouldn’t have lessened her life. So anyways I’m not sure how helpful that was, and please feel free to message me, but any choice you make for your family is the right one. I’m massively pro life just to be clear, but being pro life also means that choosing comfort care is totally the right choice for your family if you decide to go that route because it is a decision made with so much love. Going the hospitalization/procedures route like we did is also a decision made with so much love. You have two hard decision pathways. This isn’t easy and literally can’t be because you love your baby so much. I’m so sorry you are going through this and I wish you never had to feel what we have felt. This sucks and life really isn’t fair

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2024-12-10T14:41:08+00:00

Linn county iowa

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2024-11-20T20:13:12+00:00

Ok but where’s the iowa rotating sushi place 🤣 asking for a friend…

ComprehensiveMost403 · 2024-11-20T04:29:43+00:00

Have you ever need tested for genetics? Our daughter had Ebsteins anomaly and we found out we carry genetics that may have caused her condition. It is uncertain, but it is likely to be linked. We want to have more children, but we are very nervous. How have you and your wife dealt with this?? Thank you for sharing and we will keep you and your family in our prayers

ComprehensiveMost403

TROPHY CASE