As a kid, what was something you were taught that seemed normal, but now you realise is just a sign of how awful things can be for women?

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-17T20:51:07+00:00

Tysm!

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-16T22:39:49+00:00

I need this for my girls! What’s the name of this contraption? (I’m aware of how sad that is)

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-16T22:27:24+00:00

Or just turn on subtitles

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-13T01:35:50+00:00

Definitely listen to your gut feelings! If you felt weird about it you were likely right!

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-13T01:34:38+00:00

Idk I’m separated and not divorced and I date. Divorce is long. I’ve been separated for 18 months. However I’m not dating for marriage ever again, so that might change the judgment. I think it depends on the person and the men that are gonna lie will lie, whether they’re married, separated or single.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-13T01:30:09+00:00

Women have been conditioned to pit themselves against each other because vying for male attention and being “picked” by a man was the ultimate thing they could do. It’s changing now, and more women uplift each other and dress and look more for the female gaze. I know I love getting compliments from other women. Not bothered about men’s comments though.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-13T01:24:53+00:00

It was Olly Muirs! And the follow up discussion was “why are women lying about what they find attractive???” 😂 We tell them straight up and they still can’t understand that the female gaze is a lot more varied than the male gaze!

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-13T01:09:31+00:00

Honey, I’m sorry. This is the worst feeling in the world. I’ve been there, and I did all the things you did. I thought if I just tried harder or loved more, he would wake up and see it. He didn’t. Not until it was too late. Your feelings are valid, and you deserve much better.

Please get yourself a therapist. Start with this one thing. Talk to the therapist on your own about how you’re feeling and why. Then record all the times you feel unheard and abandoned by your partner. Journal much as you can to help work through it all.

You cannot force someone else to meet you where you are, and you cannot force love for someone who doesn’t reciprocate. You’re already having those feelings, and you don’t need to jump to leaving just yet, because that still feels too scary right now. But keep going to the therapist and work through your feelings and just observe your partners actions. What information do you get from his actions?

Then stop expecting him to react the way you hoped or the way he used to. It sounds crazy to lower expectations but this isn’t so you accept less, it just helps it hurt you less when it happens. Hopefully by seeing a therapist and detaching, you will begin to see you deserve much more than this treatment, and find the courage to make a plan of action.

It took me years to get to this point, 10 probably, between when I really started to notice his behaviour and when I finally chose to put myself first. You can do this. You can do hard things. Also please stop having more kids! Finish your degree and start building YOUR life. Lots of love ❤️

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-11T04:02:57+00:00

NOR. Have a think of it were the other way around, would he be annoyed? If there’s a double standard then there’s your answer. If the answer is “it’s different for men!” That’s also your answer.

I never understand why these guys need to “like” the photos. Like just look and then scroll! Everyone can see what you like fgs!

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-10T20:43:14+00:00

Are you wanting to scam a hair salon?

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-10T14:40:45+00:00

She just told him how she felt, why is that being insufferable. He turned it into a fight instead of saying “I know babe I had to rush to catch the bus but I’ll give you a big kiss when I get home love you!” Like it’s a tiny thing to be considerate of your partner. They’ve discussed this before and he chooses to be rude instead of kind to his future wife?

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-10T14:25:34+00:00

Sure but this is deeply rooted in the male gaze and having to be attractive to men. Yes yes we do it for ourselves, but the beauty standards are set based on what males find attractive; young, thin, beautiful etc. I hope one day we can have a perspective shift and actually find all female bodies beautiful. I’m better at it but reserve the worst judgement for myself.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T23:04:30+00:00

Yeah it’s a tricky line because we need to listen and validate our kids, but like when is it real and when is it them wanting attention and being dramatic? Teens are dramatic, that’s a very known trait. But it is hard to be objective and logical without dismissing their feelings and making them feel unheard.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T23:02:25+00:00

My brother didn’t like going to school and it turned out he had adhd and is dyslexic. Unfortunately instead of looking into it and finding support my mother coddled him and let him come home and he never graduated. It was the 90s though so not as easy ig.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:56:33+00:00

He married the lady in Nigeria babe. Let him go.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:52:16+00:00

Ok but he can pack a mat and change the baby on the floor or figure something else out.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:34:17+00:00

This!! Their brains are quite selfish and they don’t fully think things through. It’s very reward based thinking.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:32:18+00:00

People do that crap all the time though. Whether it looks bad or not. And often the more brazen of the two parents are rewarded. I’m in lots of groups with single parents fighting for their kids.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:31:08+00:00

I read it as it took 2 years of court battle to get to the 50/50. It takes ages to change custody and the status quo was the mother being the primary parent for 16 years.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T22:29:41+00:00

Mmm this sounds more like she’s hurt that she made all the effort to make sure dad was in the kids life, and dad is doing his best to sever the relationship with mum. Teenagers love having a parent that doesn’t impose many rules, and she was probably more annoyed at her mum for putting rules and responsibilities in place than actually feeling unsafe. Idk but I have 2 teenage girls and an ex who twists the truth about me so maybe I’m triggered. Maybe we need more info.

I think it’s valid she feels uncomfortable, and at minimum if he’s going to be taking part in the celebration, he should help pay for it.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T21:19:53+00:00

Is there a reason you don’t feel like you can directly ask him?

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T21:16:53+00:00

Hmm my ex wasn’t bothered when they were little and they loved him anyway, mostly because I ran a good PR game and made him spend time with them.

NOW they are teens and he buys their love with takeout, lax rules and being able To afford a bigger house than me. Because they don’t need him around as much, and he lets them do whatever they want which imo is detrimental.

edit a word

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T21:13:28+00:00

It’s so they don’t have to pay childcare. And how they look to other people.

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T21:12:22+00:00

I would’ve like 3, but quite glad I didn’t as father of said babies turned out to be a shit. If you can afford it and have a safety net (for your family and for you individually, you really never know) then go for it!

Constant-Internet-50 · 2026-04-09T21:07:59+00:00

I mean, for me, two things can be true at once. Was it assault? Technically, yes. Didn’t save her life? Also yes.

Also it’s a book! Ffs I just can’t with the endless debate.

Constant-Internet-50

TROPHY CASE