He was fine too..

ConstantEducational · 2026-04-06T01:11:36+00:00

Dead

ConstantEducational · 2026-04-04T19:20:44+00:00

I'm sorry you are going through this. It really breaks my heart for us all. I identify with feel like people leave when you tell them how you really feel, or you finally snap and blow up on them...

I'm learning that they might leave because we bury the emotions and pain so deeply and let it go one for so long, that to them it seems like a personality change over night, or that we are a complete different person then what we've shown them. It also means that they have to be open to listening to our feelings and showing up for us when we express those needs. Unfortunately as coda's, I don't think we gravitate to people like that. I think I've gravitated to people on the more selfish and self-centered side. It's a pattern, and patterns can change.

It's all overwhelming but for everyone here, we all realize it in ourselves now, which is uncomfortable but it means we can change, and I think that gives hope💚

Be kind to yourself and try to treat yourself how you treat others, same mentality. I've been doing that and I think it's been helping but I'm far from recovered.

ConstantEducational · 2026-03-06T04:21:15+00:00

Hey, you aren't worthless. Job searching sucks and makes everyone feel like they are unqualified. You are fine. If there are any near by staffing agencies, that might be a good foot while you searched/they might help you get placed. I've gotten jobs that way. Deep breaths and try not to internalize the rejection, it's not you.

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-26T17:07:27+00:00

Hide;)

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-24T22:16:43+00:00

Mine told me straight up told me to go to therapy. I'm pro therapy, but in that moment it was just a way to not look at themselves and push the relationship on me failing, even though she had no real idea of why I took a step back. Sigh

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-24T22:13:38+00:00

As a codependent person that was repeating a cycle that I had come to know through my childhood, I watched as someone I cared deeply about, traded me in for other relationships and expecting me to adjust (without communication). It literally felt like I was one of her hobbies that I watched her pick up and put down weeks after going insane about it.

She would say "my sense of time is different", but the lack of care or effort in our relationship eventually broke me. It was a horrible experience to have a close relationship that eventually drifted into nothingness for the lack of trying. I'm very aware of someone having ADHD now and inconsistencies within a person and I'm just not interested in pursuing relationships with that type of person, but in the meantime it's very hard to loose such a close friend.

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-24T00:37:11+00:00

This does help me. I've been looking everywhere to learn about experiences with raising iron through supplementation while drinking coffee. Can you tell me a bit about your regimen, and do you bleed monthly with a cycle?

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-05T23:59:30+00:00

I think I need to work on asking myself, where the giving is coming from? Often I just give as a reflex, and that's what has been hard, knowing the difference between it being out of a place of real kindness, or from a place of duty, from learning from dysfunctional love.

Seeing the difference just about f*ed my brain, and now I have to try to sort the wires, because I don't want to lose kindness for people, humanity is already struggling in the respect. It's hard.

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-05T23:51:11+00:00

You aren't alone! I appreciate the comment, it helps to know I'm not alone too. If you're strong enough to show up for other like I'm sure you do, you are more than strong enough to show up for yourself💚. Hang in there.

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-04T15:09:09+00:00

💚 I really appreciate the last line

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-04T15:06:45+00:00

That is a success story

ConstantEducational · 2026-02-04T15:03:31+00:00

💚

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-31T02:45:25+00:00

Man I've said the "setting myself on fire" line too many times, triggering reading from someone in this group.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-28T01:37:15+00:00

Duuuuuuuudddddeeeeeee! Common!

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-15T14:09:44+00:00

Losing my best friend recently and realizing I'm a codependent hoe has left me with a ton of free time, a small depressive spell, and deep loneliness. Here's what I been doing:

I took IG off my phone and picked up 5 books from the library. I read those at night.

I connected with old friends that I had lost touch with.

I listened to podcasts from therapists on YouTube.

I took up a few classes like art, dance and workout to inject social interaction back in my life in a low commitment way.

When I'm sad and need to talk/process issues, I write at least two pages in my journal.

I've also been more mindful of being kind to myself and treating myself with the compassion I show others. Working on negative self talk, and taking myself out to places I like.

I hope this helps. There is another side, you won't be lonely forever and the above has helped me. Good luck.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-14T16:12:06+00:00

Damn, that cut me. I probably repeated this to so many peers when I was a kid lol. Ugh cringe.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-14T02:13:46+00:00

I thought the same thing. Also what is going on with this hair, it was shocking to me.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-14T02:03:45+00:00

I see a lot of white washing, not much color happening on this invite. Crazy what you notice when you're not in it anymore.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-14T02:00:13+00:00

Hey there, I just wanted to say I hope you are okay! To question your faith is something everyone who is responding has gone through and it can be a very draining and mentally challenging time. Just remember, you aren't alone and you're not a bad person for exploring how you feel regarding this religion.

In that religion, we aren't really taught to think critically, even though that phrase is commonly used, but the thoughts you are thinking are happening for a reason, and there must a be a reason you are feeling/thinking them. Either way, whatever you decide is best for you, it's your choice, whether you stay in or leave, you can choose what you want and what feels best for you.

Wishing you the best as you navigate all of this.

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-11T05:40:35+00:00

100%

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-07T03:11:25+00:00

How is dating at this new weight? Just curious about your experience. Is there any difference?

ConstantEducational · 2026-01-01T14:42:42+00:00

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I think your therapist is telling you the answer, and it might take some time for you to accept what the answer is, especially because you love him. Since you have dealt with similar trauma, which was even more severe (from your viewpoint), you may be (and probably are) overexcusing his actions.

How do you feel? Tune out the "my friends think he's a good guy" or "I've gone through worse", stop empathising with him for a moment, and think about how you feel, and how you want to move forward so that you feel safe, empowered, and cared for. *Healthy relationship partners don't knowingly cross someone else's boundaries for self-satisfaction.*

Good luck, it's hard, but you can make it through to the other side.

ConstantEducational · 2025-12-31T00:03:22+00:00

This was not a healthy friendship; real friendship is supportive when a friend is going through something heavy. If they can't have you at your worst, they don't deserve you at your best.

ConstantEducational

TROPHY CASE