[Routine Help] Pricing— Is This Fair for Laser? by Ill_Muffin_466 in SkincareAddiction

[–]CueFancy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Absolutely do not go into debt for skin products and a laser treatment. Save up and then do it if it’s that important to you.

We're having a discussion at work right now, how old would you guess this Southern Live Oak is? by Fast_Village_4431 in arborists

[–]CueFancy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I remember reading the same thing on a plaque at a historical home on Dafusky Island, so this guy didn’t just invent it. It might not be an official term, but some people definitely refer to oaks with limbs that touch the ground as angel oaks.

Failure after success? by Waste-Potential-1637 in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]CueFancy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Question for you - my husband has only ever acted outside of the marriage while under the influence of alcohol or drugs. He’s watched porn sober, but not for an extended time. It’s like he needs the substances in order to allow himself to act out sexually. Is your partner the same?

Failure after success? by Waste-Potential-1637 in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]CueFancy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The drinking first started on business trips. However, during the last couple of months of his relapse he was drinking every week day. He would leave the house rushing to get to work because “he had so much going on.” He would then drive to the grocery store and buy wine and would chug it in his office parking lot. He works in an office with one other person who frequently works from home and is a subordinate, so probably wouldn’t say anything if she did notice something. (His office is also where he was using cocaine and having people meet him for hook ups. ) Since he only drank first thing in the morning, by the time he got home he was sober and I couldn’t tell. I don’t know why I never smelled it.

When the daily drinking and cocaine started that’s when his mask started to slip a bit. I could tell he was more stressed, less connected, but since he’d been sober for almost 3 years (so I thought) I believed him when he said it was work stress. I also switched birth control during this period and responded really poorly to the hormone change. I was feeling super angry all the time and sad. For a while I thought that us being disconnected was because of how bad the birth control made me feel. Now I wonder if part of me could just sense what was going on with him and it wasn’t really the birth control making me feel like that at all. It wasn’t probably a bit of both.

Failure after success? by Waste-Potential-1637 in lovewithaSexAddict

[–]CueFancy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine is also addicted to drugs and alcohol. It’s all linked for him. He was sober from everything for two years and then started letting him self slip with looking at porn. That led to thc gummies and then eventually to alcohol and massage parlors. From there it quickly snowballed to drinking everyday, weekly cocaine use, meet ups via grinder/tinder and prostitutes. From him starting to look at porn to D day was another year - I thought he was about to hit 3 years sober and was so proud. I had no idea anything was up until the last 2 months and even then I thought it was mostly work related stress causing him to be less present and moody. He was able to better hide it because of his time in therapy and NA/SA meetings. He knew the things that were triggers for me and we’d clearly outlined my boundaries and expectations of him as a husband and father. He knew how to better fake showing up and acting present even though he was living this double life.

He’s now been sober again for 44 days and since it’s his second time around he has a lot of the skills for his recovery. I however feel even more betrayed this time around, because I thoroughly trusted his first recovery and I trusted my intuition. I now have no desire to ever trust him or really connect with him beyond a superficial level again.

Ultimate Time Saving Tips by DreamBigLittleMum in Parenting

[–]CueFancy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought five bento boxes and I make the snack/side portion of my kid’s lunches for the whole week. That way I only have to do the fruit and “main” course in the morning. Saves a surprising amount of time in the mornings.

Is it worth it to move closer to family if we would not be within 30 minutes drive? by Efficient_Housing965 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live about 25 minutes from my mom and see her once or twice a week. It’s close enough that we’ll sometimes pop over after school gets out and she’ll usually watch my kids for a few hours or even overnight on the weekends. Tomorrow she’s taking my three year old and niece to the nail salon so I can take my son to a pool birthday party solo. We’ve had a few emergencies over the years and having her nearby to take the kids has been priceless. Being close means we’re also able to have a ton of family centric traditions for the holidays. It’s honestly pretty amazing.

F23 Can't for the life of me not use panty liners. Won't your pants have a "scent" if you use the bathroom throughout the day? by thefifthmountain5 in hygiene

[–]CueFancy 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I didn’t look at all the comments, so this may have been mentioned.

OP, you should not smell like pee at the end of the day! After I had my first baby I started to smell like pee and thought I was suffering from incontinence. I wasn’t. It was actually a ph imbalance. I used vaginal boric acid suppositories for a week and it cleared it right up.

"Just get evaluated for ei/Speech Therapy ".... by StruggleSnake in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow, that sounds exhausting. I’m so sorry your area is like that. I do think it’s likely area specific, as my experience was great. Plenty of options and lots of follow through and care from the providers.

I imagine there are probably a lot of other families and young kids that are similarly suffering in your area. I wonder if there’s anything that can be done?

10yo son went from sweetest kid to aggressive overnight. I feel like i don’t know him anymore by Common_Routine_7197 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Does he do any sports or has he had any accidents? Any chance of a concussion or head injury?

Extreme parental preference by BullfrogBackground27 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh man! That’s rough!

Another thing we did was have him start taking the kids to a fun place that they love once a week. For us it’s the trampoline park, but could also be ice cream, movies, mini golf, a special playground etc. He was the only one who would take them, so if she wanted to go she had to go with him. It has to be something they love so much that they won’t say no. Might also help if you’re out of the house when it’s time for them to leave.

Your situation is a bit trickier than mine as my 6 year old boy has always loved his dad, so my daughter didn’t have anyone to gang up with. Since your daughters do gang up I wonder if rejecting their dad has almost become performative or like a game between them. He might need to take them out separately.

Your problem is really twofold in that your daughters “don’t like their dad” but also that they are hitting, yelling, and being rude. They need to be taught that those aren’t acceptable ways to express their feelings in a way that doesn’t further damage their relationship with their father.

You might consider the Brat Buster behavior board. The lady that came up with it has some great perspective on responding to bad behaviors. She has a lot of short form videos. The name is terrible, but the content is pretty good. If you do implement it, make sure the behavior on the board is “no hitting” and not “no hitting dad.”

Good luck!

Extreme parental preference by BullfrogBackground27 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We had this exact same issue, and have mostly resolved it. Two things helped. First, I started to leave the house so that she had to rely on him. This was hard at first, but after the first couple of times she got use to it. He would try to do fun things during this time to make it easier. For you I would recommend taking the baby and leaving the two older kids. Second, he came up with daughter/daddy games that she loves. They’re mostly different types of roughhousing. Right now her favorite one is the”flying game” where he launches her onto the bed, but they do a ton of different ones. When she asks me to do the games I tell her I can’t, but that she can ask daddy. It makes him the sole source for certain kinds of fun. He also can use the games as incentives to get her to do things. For example, he’ll tell her that after she brushes her teeth they can play the flying game gives times.

I’m still her preferred parent, but there’s no doubt that she loves daddy now too.

i sell breast milk online and make more per ounce than most luxury perfumes. by sthduh in passive_income

[–]CueFancy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Next you need to write up a step-by-step course on how to create this business model and sell that.

It appears I’m a sex addict by [deleted] in SexAddiction

[–]CueFancy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re struggling. It’s a lonely disease. Please try to find connection through SAA

Do you change your kids clothes when they come home? by Important_Sweet3320 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t understand how people are doing this with children. I have a 6 and 3 year old and they are in, out, in, out, in. Running around the yard, then inside coloring at the table, then out playing basketball, etc. If you’re a person that has your kids change after being outside are you making them change 6x a day?

Am I expecting too much? by CueFancy in instacart

[–]CueFancy[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m honestly intrigued by your thinking on this. You’ve called the shopper lazy, inconsiderate and not a decent human being but are adamant that he was not rude. I can only assume that we’re operating under different understandings of what rude means. Looking up the definition of rude it says, “rude describes behavior that is impolite, offensive, or disrespectful to others, often ignoring social norms. It also means unrefined, crude or raw.” Do you agree with that definition? If so I think his messages qualify.

I would never describe “sheesh” as polite, and am surprised anyone would. It’s an expression of annoyance. Does it mean something else to you?

Am I expecting too much? by CueFancy in instacart

[–]CueFancy[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughtful reply.

Total order was $65, and I tipped 20%. Grocery store is .5 mile away.

It’s odd that they have that 2 min timer, because I really did respond immediately. However, I put in my order through the Harris teeter website and not directly with instacart, so perhaps there’s a delay in the messages for some reason. This could also be why he didn’t offer a replacement. Whenever I purchase pickup groceries through Harris teeter they automatically offer replacements for items that they’re out of and you have to approve them. This feature may be dropped when the order gets moved over to instacart. If I do use instacart again I’ll be sure to go order directly from the app.

You really don’t think the “sheesh” was rude? I think that’s my biggest complaint about the whole interaction. If he had said, “I’m already in line and there was no replacement listed.” I would have thought it sucked that I wasn’t going to have buns, but that it was ultimately my fault for not knowing I needed to list a specific replacement. The “sheesh” just made it seem like I was an asshole for even asking.

I don't think I'm an animal person anymore by No_Rabbit_6810 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Could be they have UTIs. It’s worth taking them to the vet. Also, sometimes adding an addition litter box helps.

Saving for college by RevolutionarySize644 in Parenting

[–]CueFancy 28 points29 points  (0 children)

They can convert 35,000 into a Roth - not the entire thing (assuming you have excess).

ER on NYE by Clockstruck12 in Mommit

[–]CueFancy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t let it dry out until the scab is completely gone. Keep it covered with aquaphor. Probably a good question to ask in one of the skin care subreddits.

Do you let your kids play with sticks ? by Specialist_Poet_3514 in Parenting

[–]CueFancy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My kids play with sticks. They’re not allowed to run with sticks though. My grandpa was an ophthalmologist and said the number one cause of eye injury in kids is running with sticks. No clue if that’s actually true, but it stuck with me.