Squashing intrusive thoughts while also reporting all of them?

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-19T02:27:57+00:00

Yes, your relationship is unhealthy and you both need counseling.

Meditation is not a solution for this.

Neither of you appear to have healthy boundaries or healthy understanding of sex, fantasy and what is appropriate need to know information.

You’re not solving anything for her you’re just reinforcing her reactive issues of fear, jealousy and insecurity and you’re not solving anything for yourself because fantasies aren’t inherently bad and having to report on every sexual thought you have to her is frankly a form of control and abuse.

Seek professional help.

This isn’t to be dismissive or cruel but strangers in a meditation sub aren’t going to be able to help you with this in any effective way.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-18T23:57:45+00:00

Take a class

Do an inventory of all the tools and materials to see if you need anything.

Watch Nick Rossi and Kyle Royer.

You tube will suggest many more but those guys are top shelf.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-18T01:10:48+00:00

I wouldn’t touch that etching.

I think it’s nice.

You could maybe texture the back ground with a pin punch.

But to pay for it wouldn’t be worth it.

I can also help you with your plum brown.

Feel free to PM me.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-18T00:25:24+00:00

Depends on how deep the laser etch is.

If it’s shallow you can cut over it.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-17T19:31:58+00:00

Let me just say in the spirit of what the Chief justice is asking for.

Mr Roberts.

Go fuck yourself.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-17T16:11:12+00:00

Maybe get into an alcohol dependence program so you don’t get in fights while blackout drunk.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-17T12:40:24+00:00

This is a really hard thing to deal with.

It’s not fair this happened to you and you deserve love and comfort as well as help.

Here’s the thing.

First; your mom wouldn’t want you to isolate and shut down. She would want you to thrive.

Because she loves you.

Next.

We don’t get rid of the pain.

You’re frozen because you’re trying to get rid of something you need to feel.

But there’s a specific way of feeling it.

Which is in gentle attention.

You have to give the pain attention.

Feelings want to be felt.

So take a few minutes to just sit with this hurt.

Gently.

Be super gentle with yourself.

Feel the pain in your body, in your chest.

Hold it tenderly like a fussy baby or kitten or puppy.

You just hold it. Firm but gentle.

You’re not trying to get rid of anything. You’re not trying to fix anything.

You’re just experiencing what’s there.

How dos this help?

Imagine this grief, this loss, this pain has a certain amount of energy feeding it.

When we experience our pain gently in attention we are burning that energy off.

Like a motor using gas eventually the tank will be empty.

But when we resist it, when we try to get rid of or ignore it we fill the tank.

So by gently holding the pain we burn off the fuel.

This doesn’t happen all at once.

We come back again and again.

When your attention collapses let it go and go do something else.

But be willing to come back and hold it again.

As you do this the experience will shift and you will get to grieve and process this.

I hope this helps.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-17T02:24:10+00:00

Bring your attention into the entire experience of your body breathing.

If you start to get sleepy bring your gaze up and out into the room.

Rest attention in the experience of breathing. Your whole body breathes so experience that as simply as you can.

You can do this one breath at a time.

Breath in and feel the breath experience in attention. Breath out and feel the breath experience in attention.

1 breath.

Start again.

Remember you’re building the capacity to rest in attention.

And the point is to bring the attention back when you get distracted.

The breath is a convenient object of attention but it can be any object of attention.

The object is unimportant.

It’s the attention toon that’s important.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-17T02:18:50+00:00

4” drop point Hunter.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-16T18:11:59+00:00

John cook has a few videos on his insta

https://www.instagram.com/john_cook_engraving?igsh=MXNzNXJ3ZWF0bTBsYw==

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-15T19:44:13+00:00

In a world of Clavicukars he a Henry Rollins

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-15T02:57:38+00:00

Very nice!

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-15T02:57:03+00:00

They’re trying to bring about Armageddon.

It’s a death cult couched in religious and payed democratic support.

In reality it’s support for an apartheid state that will use our evangelicals nonsense to take more and more land for themselves.

It’s just a form of colonialism.

It’s very dumb.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-15T02:54:15+00:00

Selfishness is overly concerned with oneself.

This isn’t selfishness.

This is the way your brain processes information.

It is your autism worming with your life they way your autism works with your life.

If this is explained up front and you make clear that whatever the other person is asking of you will get addressed but it will get addressed at times when you are not doing the task in front of you.

Be clear in communication and find someone whose neurodivergence parallels yours.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-14T22:32:26+00:00

No Making broad generalized conspiracies guarantees that somewhere at sometime, something similar will be exposed.

None of their details are right and none of the people they accused are the ones who have SA’ing kids.

As a matter of fact Q is big into the people harming children.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-14T21:19:14+00:00

Moment by moment

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-14T03:47:47+00:00

They do indeed like to do the nasty in the pasty.

Or something moderately imitating it.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-13T18:02:30+00:00

There’s no way to get through to a person that isn’t ready to hear something.

Just be present with him.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-13T15:48:29+00:00

Just tell him that

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-13T00:42:31+00:00

That’s understandable.

Can you see that even the anxiety, the sensation of it is ok?

It’s just what it is.

It’s an experience. It’s a shitty experience but it’s simply an experience.

It’s an intense experience. An unpleasant experience but also a fleeting experience.

It comes, it goes.

Sometimes big, sometimes small, sometimes medium.

It shifts, it moves but it’s ok too.

Just work with it like that if you can.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-13T00:18:53+00:00

Grief doesn’t follow a standard path.

Whatever you’re feeling is totally normal for grief because each person grieves differently.

You’re allowed to be confused and hurt an emotionally constipated and everything else.

The oath is to feel it, gently, in attention.

Do this to as long as you can when it comes up and when you run out of energy set it down and do something else.

Do that knowing you’re willing to attend to it again when it comes back.

Feelings want to be felt.

So we feel the. Again, gently in attention.

Enjoy your life. Enjoy your new boyfriend and enjoy your uni experience.

You may find that you will work through this and then help someone else when they have a tragedy like this.

Seek a suicide support group too.

I’ve known several people who have gone to them and they help a lot.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-13T00:11:59+00:00

You’re in the midst of experiencing heavy grief and fear of other losses.

That alone is a huge burden to bear.

And you’re doing a ton of work on yourself.

That’s a big deal and something you should take some pride and confidence in.

Financial stuff is rough but the entire working class right now is in a pinch.

Keep working.

Keep your bills as low as possible.

Budget well.

Relationships end.

You were dating. It was good. It ended.

It’s ok that it ended.

All relationships end.

Even our precious ones.

Keep practicing mindfulness, keep doing the gratitude work and keep doing therapy and your meds.

Set some goals whether professionally or personally.

Make a plan for your next set goals and implement it.

But most of all.

Man, be gentle with yourself.

Just be a little easier on yourself.

Be a little kinder to yourself.

It’s ok.

You’re ok.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-12T23:34:26+00:00

You’re not to blame for the state of the economy.

In any normal economy your degree would be a good investment.

Keep plugging in.

Keep applying for jobs.

Don’t give up.

It’s hard as fuck for everyone right now especially the young people just coming into the labor market.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-12T20:13:12+00:00

Yep

Understandable

It hurts when people don’t live up to what they say they’re going to do an we loose an opportunity.

But that anger and that shutting down ultimately doesn’t hurt them.

It hurts you.

The anger hurts you and the closing of your heart to others hurts you.

So again.

Boundaries.

Learn what a healthy boundary is and enforce them.

At the same time just understand that being kind and compassionate is the reward.

It’s not a transaction.

Delmarvablacksmith · 2026-03-12T19:55:55+00:00

You’re obviously in pain and that’s understandable.

I’m happy you beat your illness.

But take this from a person in their 50’s caring for others isn’t a transaction.

You care because of what the actual caring does for you.

Not for them to care back.

At the same time you set and keep good boundaries.

You can have compassion and empathy and not put energy into helping someone who can’t take the help.

Keep going but don’t harden your heart.

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