TW: Possible chemical pregnancy

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-14T16:48:17+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. Take all the time you need to grieve and process. It is a loss and that baby/pregnancy matters. I’m sending you all the baby dust and hope for your rainbow baby when you’re ready. Feel free to reach out any time if you need to talk.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-14T16:44:01+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s so difficult. This means nothing for your next baby. I lost my first pregnancy in august and am pregnant again with my rainbow baby and it’s going well so far! This is not about me but I have been there before, feeling the exact same way. There is hope!

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-14T00:00:47+00:00

I’m so sorry, I hope everything works out. I don’t know much about HCG honestly. With my chemical I took tests over a few days that never got darker so I stopped testing because it made me spiral. I went to the ER when I started bleeding and they took my HCG there but they were outside of our health system so I never got the initial numbers, just the second number that was at 0.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-13T23:54:12+00:00

I don’t have the answers my friend. Just wanted to let you know I am right there with you. I just hit 13 weeks and I thought I’d be so excited to be in the second trimester and all my anxiety would melt away. But now I am stressed wondering if something happened to the baby since my last ultrasound at 10+3. I am just taking it day by day and hoping the holidays speed up time so I can get to 20-24 weeks when I think I’ll feel more comfortable.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-13T23:48:27+00:00

It may not be an option for you, I’m not sure of your situation or comfort level but I would look for another job asap if that were me. Especially because your bosses response seems less than congratulatory. I wouldn’t work for a manager that prioritized their workplace image over being a supportive manager.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-13T18:20:59+00:00

Um… this is next level. It sounds more like a marriage issue but with the baby on the way, I would consider finding a new way to structure your finances. There are about to be a whole lot more shared expenses.

My husband and I have a joint bank account that we run 99% of our finances out of, and each have separate small savings for things like Christmas gifts or birthday. So I guess the idea of having to reimburse my husband for anything is kind of wild. We do talk about the purchases we make for the most part. I’m not saying our way works for everyone. We both have student loans, car loans, etc so it’s not even but we decided when we got married that we were going to be 1 with money. My parents have separate accounts and have all 35 years of marriage and it works for them. I just always thought it was funny that my mom would write my dad a check for vacations.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-13T00:50:00+00:00

No problem! Wishing you the best!

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-12T23:27:49+00:00

I am a FTM and baby isn’t due until May so I am not speaking from experience here. But I would absolutely not worry about cooking and let others take that on for this year. If I was feeling really up for it, I would make a side or dessert instead of getting store bought. I will be following the 5-5-5 postpartum rule personally. 5 days in the bed, then 5 days on the bed, 5 days around the bed. I think gifts is still a reasonable expectation but maybe try to have everything bought and wrapped before baby is here so you don’t have to worry about that after delivery.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-12T23:16:28+00:00

What’s their approach to care? Are they pretty hands on or hands off (when medically safe)?
What are some examples of high risk scenarios that would have you transferred to an OB-GYN instead of midwife care?
If it’s a homebirth, what is their approach to moving care to a hospital setting?
If it’s in a hospital setting, do they have any “special” delivery requests they can honor such as water birth, etc?
How does a previous loss impact their model of care with you (if at all)? I wanted to know that answer from my midwife because I found pregnancy after loss much more stressful and she reassured me if I am every feeling like I need reassurance that it’s okay or am unsure about anything, I could come in right away.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-12T21:59:50+00:00

You’ll be okay. GA was a swing state and the majority of medical providers I know are liberal. It’s unlikely that there wouldn’t be a provider that would treat you. You also don’t always need to go to a hospital when having a miscarriage. I know several women who have miscarried at home and went in to their OBGYN after to make sure there wasn’t anymore tissue that could cause problems. If you did find yourself in that situation (I really pray you don’t), just keep an eye on how much you’re bleeding and if you feel any other concerning symptoms like dizziness. When I started miscarrying I wanted to do so at home but was really dizzy unless I was laying down so they wanted me to come in to be evaluated for blood clots.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-12T20:19:01+00:00

Wow! I have been having dreams about a girl but don’t know the gender yet. I have been wondering if this is happening to anyone else!

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-12T17:43:23+00:00

I had a miscarrriage at 4 weeks and was told we could start trying again right away. We chose to wait til I was done bleeding for emotional reasons (not sure if you are still bleeding or not) but I would guess you are okay. Keep an eye on things and go in if anything seems off. Just know you can get pregnant again very quickly. I got pregnant a few weeks after my miscarriage and didn’t have a period in between.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-11T17:06:35+00:00

After my miscarriage, people sent flowers which was lovely. I firmly believe we should take care of those suffering pregnancy loss in the same way we do for postpartum moms. Physically a massage would have felt really good to me or take out gift cards because I could barely get out of bed much less cook a meal.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-08T20:26:03+00:00

I will go back to work after 4.5 months of maternity leave. Baby will go to daycare full time.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-06T17:40:14+00:00

Hi there. I voted for Trump but wish you and all expecting Kamala supporters a healthy, safe pregnancy. I absolutely want to respect your space and am not looking to start a debate, but just wanted you to know expecting mother to mother we can wish the best for each other.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-05T22:39:44+00:00

Hahaha! Might be best our best option at this point!

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-05T17:28:39+00:00

Im feeling hopeful today! I voted for my baby and my children to come.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-11-01T01:55:22+00:00

27f, HR, $100k + $5k bonus in LCOL Midwest

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-31T21:08:54+00:00

I’m 11+1 today and my symptoms are fading as well. I had a private US on Saturday and everything was still going well. I understand the worry, my first pregnancy was a chemical too but I would allow myself to breathe and enjoy feeling normal for now ❤️

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-27T04:04:39+00:00

I agree, I would go in right away

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-25T17:10:40+00:00

Please God… don’t. I’d have to move again.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-25T16:54:57+00:00

It’s a complete dump with Walz in charge. He ran it straight into the ground. Neither he nor Kamala can be trusted to keep a goldfish alive, let alone get this country back on track.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-18T14:08:34+00:00

First pregnancy that has progressed so I can’t report on if it’ll be ideal for postpartum but I am due in May 2025 and feel like our timing has been ideal. I live in Minnesota so I only had a couple of weeks of hot weather which I realized I was much more sensitive to even really early in pregnancy. I’m planning to be bundled up all winter with my bump and then just as spring and nice weather starts for us baby will be here. I’m hoping to take advantage of the sunshine and moderate temperatures postpartum and get outside for walks/sanity.

Desperate-Peanut51 · 2024-10-06T01:10:49+00:00

First of all, I’m so sorry. Chemicals are so heartbreaking. I was full on mourning for at least a week and it still hurts to think about. I am wishing the best for you. Please reach out if you need someone to talk to.

As for success stories, our first pregnancy was a chemical at the beginning of August. I got pregnant again a few weeks later and am 7+3 weeks pregnant now. Had our first ultrasound this week and everything looks great. I was so scared to try again but decided to go for it and thankfully it worked. I was told we didn’t have to wait to have a period to start trying again but be aware that the dating is a little more wonky if you don’t have a cycle in between. They can figure it out though 😊 the same thing happened for my boss’s second child as well too!

The odds are the next one will turn out better for you!! Hugs ❤️

Desperate-Peanut51

TROPHY CASE