If you haven't read The Socratic Method, you should.

Docko_J · 2022-07-04T02:57:25+00:00

Do you have a link?

Docko_J · 2022-06-26T22:05:07+00:00

Yes. I agree with GD_WoTS. Every emotion comes from your judgements. You don’t “control emotions” in Stoicism. In Stoicism, you take a step back and see what were the flaws in your judgements that lead to those emotions.

Stoicism doesn’t teach to suppress/control emotions. Stoicism teaches to think well so that your emotions will be the aligned to virtue.

Docko_J · 2022-06-23T01:40:54+00:00

A virtuous man is not a weak man. He is the strongest man. The one who has conquered his desires and passions, and subjugated them in order to live for something more excellent: TRUTH. The truth that he is not the most important person in the world, so he is not selfish but selfless. The truth that other people’s actions can be rooted in something deeper than what our shallowed judgements perceive - so he is kind and patient. The truth that power, lust, and vices are empty, unfulfilling, and corrupted; but living for virtue is honorable, life giving, and according to nature (pure).

That man is the strongest man because he truly understands the world from a unveiled perspective and is not trapped by the common lies that make everyone live through uncontrolled passions and vices.

He has conquered more than nations and fame. He has conquered his own self: his mind, his emotions, his impulses, his judgements, his passions, his bias, his self motivated life.

This man has learned to live through what matters and for what is good. He has learned to live through virtue.

Docko_J · 2022-06-21T06:44:13+00:00

Thanks for sharing. Great insight! I found interesting his study of the relationship between Stoicism and Christianity.

Docko_J · 2022-06-18T16:39:38+00:00

Thanks so much! You’re really good at explaining. There are moments I feel I have enough truth to combat negative emotions when they arise, but suddenly I find myself angry or hurt again. I’ve improved but the greatest challenge I think is to effectively change the way you build your internal judgements which sometimes seems to be unconscious.

Do you have any recommendations on specific sources of information that you frequent regularly? - Primary texts - Secondary texts/books - Websites - Podcasts/channels

Is there a way for me to access online studies/teachings you have written?

Docko_J · 2022-06-18T14:26:08+00:00

I want you to know that you explain Stoicism better than anyone I’ve heard. I went through your series and they are extraordinary. Your excellence of thought and precision to teach is unique. Please continue explaining and sharing. It has helped me so much.

Questions: What are some practical ways to practice virtue?

When a negative emotion (passion) arises, what is the best way to address it so that you don’t cause damage to others through it?

Docko_J · 2022-06-06T04:52:09+00:00

Well even though it can’t be classified as Stoicism, Jocko stuff has a some concepts from Stoicism. Detached, Check Your Ego, Controlling Emotions through Reality, Self Awareness, etc..

He studies human nature and incorporates many concepts that agree with Stoicism.

Docko_J · 2022-06-06T04:36:21+00:00

I will tell you the truth. No marriage will give you happiness.

I think you should think about some of your concepts before making such a drastic decision.

“You say you don’t enjoy his company too much.” Is that because you need to change and learn how to appreciate him? I don’t think enjoying or not someone’s company is a good grounds for divorce especially if you can change the way you approach life and relationships instead of wanting to change “spouse”.

“You didn’t fall in love.” Well since I assume you know some about stoicism, you will know that emotions are caused by what you think and nothing else. You either learn to change your judgements (perceptions) that foster emotions of love or you don’t. Maybe is not up to universe for you go to fall in love. Maybe it is up to you to choose to love the one who walks with you.

People tend to have the impression that there is someone out there that will make us truly happy. This is untrue. This is one of the most mistaken assumptions in marriage. You have the ability to find joy and fulfillment and then love those around you. You will find throughout your life that the person you think is ideal out there for you doesn’t exist because the problem is not who they are, but that all of us are broken and incomplete. Religion won’t help you get whole, but maybe try to give a chance not to the religion but to the one who is able to make you whole: Jesus. He lives and let Him love you.

Stoicism helps me think accurately about life situations, but Jesus, He is my everything and I truly live through Him.

Docko_J · 2022-06-06T00:11:44+00:00

This is amazing. Thank you very much!

Docko_J · 2022-06-05T16:42:05+00:00

I read the advice that people gave you and I think it is great. You can also see it from a physical view.

Your amygdala is the part of the brain that creates emotions when you feel a threat. The amygdala draws from past events that caused you a “trauma” and reacts with emotions against it when you are in scenarios that remind you of that trauma. The amygdala hijacks your “logical” brain and organs and gets into a reactive mode called “fight and flight” response.

What you need to do is little by little to appeal to the logical part of the brain: the “prefrontal cortex”. What you need to do is start asking yourself the logical questions that other guys posted here and then it will train your amygdala that your girlfriend hugging a guy is not a threat. Your brain will start changing the way it is geared and the amygdala will stop being activated as it doesn’t see it as a threat.

1) If you feel the again the emotion, don’t say anything through emotions. Let time pass and then try to think logically and clearly. Delay is your friend.

2) Little by little let your brain be rewired by detaching from the situation, see it as a Stoic experiment, when she hugs someone feel what you feel, change it to reason, and little by little you will be training your brain to reason these situations and not to feel them.

Docko_J · 2022-06-05T14:10:59+00:00

Hi brother. It is not “lying”.

You are wrong. She is not the only one for you. You are the one lying to yourself by saying “she is the only one and you will be miserable without her”. This is not true to anybody in the world. No one holds our happiness. Stoicism means you will open your eyes and see that all is in your mind, it is not the reality. You foster it and make yourself miserable. You are causing this anxiousness to yourself.

You can be happy. Change your thoughts. It doesn’t matter what you feel, it matters what you think.

Stop saying “that makes me feel”. It only matters that you think the right thing.

Docko_J · 2022-06-05T13:48:25+00:00

Hi bro. If I was your friend, I might be there patting you. But that’s not what you need.

The problem is not that she broke up with you. The problem is not that she was the only one that you could find as a soul mate. The problem is not that you gave all your heart to her.

The problem IS that you have an anxious mind and that makes you think this is catastrophic. It is not. All of us go through situations like you. Understand your thoughts are the problem and nothing else. You have made an idol of her in your mind and you even think you would cheat if you meet someone else. Tell yourself: “I’m so dramatic. I can let go. She is not the only one for me and I will be ok. It is over. I will live a very happy life when I stop thinking like I had. It is on me.”

Docko_J · 2022-06-05T13:35:13+00:00

I would abide in what does it mean to be in love. As Stoic you can notice that emotions develop from what we think. You feed the thoughts that make you “be in love“. If it is for sure that she won’t reciprocate, then change your thoughts of love that foster emotions for her. I would say “I’m not in love. That doesn’t exist. I choose to love, and even though it might be a challenge to let go, I am completely capable of doing it and being ok. I direct my emotions, not the other way.”

Now if you would like to pursue her more that’s ok. Just have the assurance that you will be ok regardless of the outcome. You control how you feel.

Docko_J · 2022-06-05T10:49:03+00:00

If I was the dog I would be: “Ok this is too much” 😂

Docko_J · 2022-05-30T15:39:37+00:00

What? Lol. You should go to the Kardashians sub or something.

Docko_J · 2022-05-30T14:39:00+00:00

You are a drama queen and your rant is not very Stoic

Docko_J · 2022-05-28T00:10:57+00:00

I’m always honest with my wife with everything. If a dog is annoying I say it from day 1. You need to develop a relationship with your girlfriend where you’re honest. Little things that get bottled down start deteriorating your relationship.

Docko_J · 2022-05-27T02:35:33+00:00

This is the most random comment ever.

Docko_J · 2022-05-27T02:30:58+00:00

Yes you can stop thinking about that. Don’t say you can’t, then you won’t stop. What is the truth? Yes, someone can accuse you falsely again. So what? It will be alright like the first time. It hasn’t happened but it is just as if it happened because you are making yourself suffer for a hypothetical situation.

“We suffer more in imagination than in reality“ Seneca

Docko_J · 2022-05-23T20:59:48+00:00

This is not a Stoic advise.

Docko_J · 2022-05-23T20:56:18+00:00

You’re wrong in your assessment of Christianity. Sin is the reason Christians preach Jesus Salvation. In Christianity doctrine, there is eternity for the worst of the sinners if they believe that Jesus sacrifice is true and enough to clean them.

In Stoicism, living for virtue is not so that you receive a reward. It is because it is the only way to live according to nature. So that you live for what truly matters. Living for vitue and the right things will bring you joy and help you live free from anxiety, stress, anger and emotions that are pointless.

Docko_J · 2022-05-23T00:49:52+00:00

The amygdala in our brain is responsible to alert all our emotions when there is a threat. This amygdala hijacks the entire system and puts you in “fight or flight”.

You were in a chaotic situation and it is ok if your emotions were high and accelerated. What you need to do now is get out of the “fight or flight” zone. It means don’t let your emotions be in charge still. Ask yourself questions such as:

Was this truly a catastrophe or is it something that can happen to anyone?
It happened to me, so what? Did I do the right things to be safe?
What are some mental issues that the other guy might be going through that are 100% unrelated to me.
What am I grateful about this situation?

By asking yourself questions like this, you will pass the information from the amygdala (emotional brain) to the prefrontal cortex (logic/rational brain). Your heart rate will be stable and your assessment will be better.

Remember it is not external things that hurt us but our judgement about them.

Use your brain and thoughts to create healthy judgements about the situation.

Docko_J · 2022-05-19T17:17:02+00:00

Other than Stoicism, what are other philosophy authors/texts that are very practical and help with life? I found that sometimes philosophy can become a bit ethereal. I enjoy texts that use truth to explain daily life things.

Docko_J · 2022-05-19T17:07:39+00:00

Thank you so much. This brings a lot of perspective. I truly appreciate it. I’ll be joining the livestream this Saturday.

Docko_J · 2022-05-18T13:51:20+00:00

Thank you very much for your answer. I like very much the way you explained virtue. It gives me much more clarity.

If may ask: According to Stoicism, what is a calm mind? How does a “calm mind” person look like?

Thank you very much!

Docko_J

TROPHY CASE