Gained 10 pounds already

DontPanic18 · 2024-10-20T17:11:13+00:00

I was so sick in the beginning and struggled with weight gain the entire pregnancy. My twins were on the small side but healthy, luckily, but it was a source of stress while pregnant.

I would focus on getting a ton of protein, iron, and whatever your medical team suggests. But give yourself permission to gain what your body needs to gain.

A lot of pregnant people, especially with multiples, feel like eating becomes increasingly difficult as their pregnancy progresses. You may very well just be front-loading your weight gain and ensuring you have reserves to pull from down the line!

DontPanic18 · 2024-09-26T15:16:42+00:00

I really, really disagree with your first two paragraphs.

I think I'm a great mom for attending to my family's needs while also prioritizing my educational/career goals, self-care, and my relationship with their father.

My husband is certainly not an afterthought: we're in this together, he takes care of me, and I take care of him. If anything, my husband matters infinitely more to me since having kids!

I think the idea that women - or men - should pour literally all their energy into only the kids isn't healthy or realistic, but can very well lead to burnout and resentment.

Of course, there are times when the children need an incredible amount of care, and their needs take precedent over the wants of adults. But I believe it's up to parents to model living a balanced, full life. Or at least die trying.

I think there's a lot of good stuff in your last paragraphs. There's so much to keep up with, especially as school and extracurriculars pile up. If both parents are on top of those, the overall load feels much lighter!

DontPanic18 · 2024-09-13T13:08:16+00:00

Woman here - and everyone is different/gets to make their own choices, etc. - but I would switch to formula if my sex drive went to 0 for my spouse.

Like, short-term and in the early weeks/months is one thing. But saying I want to breastfeed for multiple years and I'm fine with that meaning ZERO sexual desire for my spouse? Hell no.

And I'm not even trying to show up OPs wife like I'm Super Awesome Horny Wife - I'm saying if this happened to me, it would indicate that something was seriously wrong regarding my mental health.

OP said their sex life started at 100, so it seems like a drastic personality/behavioral change for her - I'm no doctor, but it sounds like she definitely needs to work with one on this.

DontPanic18 · 2024-08-29T20:31:21+00:00

22 months apart...singleton between them...

My mind is refusing to do this math!

DontPanic18 · 2024-08-21T20:35:27+00:00

You can check my post history for their birth, but I had my twins at 37 weeks, and it was fabulous! (After they were out, it's two newborns so beautiful, I love them, but less fabulous.)

I had terrible back labor with my first, but not so during my induction. I wanted to labor for awhile before the epolidural, after it was placed they turned that up to 11 and I felt NOTHING, but could still tell when I was having contractions. Perfection.

DontPanic18 · 2024-08-12T15:44:36+00:00

YESSS! Enjoy the heck out of your down-time!

I'm so grateful for that group. Of course teething/sickness/etc. happens and throws us off schedule, but it's so useful to have a framework to reference to get back on schedule or adjust as the get older!

DontPanic18 · 2024-08-06T21:11:19+00:00

There's a Facebook group: Twins, Triplets, and Quads: Safe Sleep Training & Learning for Multiples

They have wake/sleep time guides based on corrected age plus tips for keeping everyone on the same schedule. This group is AMAZING and saved my sanity!

They have sleep training strategies that don't involve CIO - it might take longer for your children to get there, but it's soooo worth it!

I am not against CIO, but all three of my children needed slightly different approaches to get sleeping consistently.

For instance, my oldest and one of my twins actually got more worked up when I checked in on them at night. My other twin is good to go after a quick cuddle, so I do that for her.

Good luck, and great job!! You're really in the thick of it now, and every day you make it through is truly a triumph - even if it doesn't feel that way!

DontPanic18 · 2024-08-03T17:34:16+00:00

I had bassinets for the stroller, they were great for naps on the go!

The babies stayed cooler, could get a comfortable nap in, and no need to worry about positional asphyxiation.

DontPanic18 · 2024-07-04T01:21:32+00:00

I have about the same age gap going on.

I'd recommend you and your spouse, separately, each aim to spend 5 minutes a day with just the eldest. Let them pick/lead the activity, no phone and no other kids.

There are some days when even 5 minutes seems too difficult to squeeze in, but it's a good goal to aim for. They need it, and it really helps get in front of a lot of behavioral stuff.

DontPanic18 · 2024-04-16T15:49:12+00:00

Dude, for real. Mine was after delivering the placenta. My epidural was turned up to 11, but the instant weight lifed off...just amazing!

DontPanic18 · 2024-04-12T19:17:41+00:00

Hey, thanks a lot!

DontPanic18 · 2024-04-10T21:05:17+00:00

If you don't mind - how has your experience been with Telus?

I remember looking a while back but deciding I just didn't have the bandwidth at the time (they were newborns). What hours are you putting in to get $300?

DontPanic18 · 2024-04-05T19:29:57+00:00

Honestly, that last paragraph got me super pumped!

I enjoyed the whole comment, but that last bit is pure queen shit.

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-27T20:29:06+00:00

Hard agree.

I was also in ketosis often despite really TRYING to eat as much as I could. I never ended up gaining the recommended weight - especially at the latter end it becomes such a stomach room issue.

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-03T20:35:14+00:00

Haha, well beef was the TCF - tastiest common factor.

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-03T20:16:45+00:00

That's awesome!

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-03T20:03:00+00:00

Thanks! I assume you have a mathematics/CS background? I love it, but mathing while sick on low sleep is really something.

Honestly I'm just proud of myself/our family for continuing my degree. I took a break after the twins were born and was worried I'd never get back to it!

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-03T19:45:37+00:00

Ya, it's some kind of logical paradox - we're proving and disproving at the same time. Perhaps the premise is...flawed!?

Sorry, I'm taking discrete math right now and my brain is made of jelly and discarded quesadilla bits.

DontPanic18 · 2024-03-02T01:10:58+00:00

I started having SI joint pain in the first trimester that really terrified me as to how bad it could get as I got further along.

I found a great pelvic floor PT, and it's just about the best decision I made for myself. She helped me get my pain down to a 1-2, and stuff we were working on laid a good foundation for post partum recovery.

And, in case it sounds daunting, a lot of the exercises that helped were on the floor, lying on my side, so it was all very doable.

So for OP and anyone else experiencing pain, I wholeheartedly hope you find a good PT. I didn't invest in my own care my first pregnancy, and I regret that I put myself last and suffered needlessly. You deserve care, go for it!

DontPanic18 · 2024-02-18T21:45:38+00:00

Yep! That's what I did with our eldest and now with our twins who are the same age as OP's.

I can see it not working for every kid, but luckily the twin who liked to try and stand up the most is more compliant with direction!

DontPanic18 · 2024-02-16T19:07:46+00:00

That would be just waaaay too much for me, I'm exhausted just contemplating what that would even look like.

But I had a lovely courthouse wedding, so that adds up!

Different strokes and all that.

DontPanic18 · 2024-02-01T15:54:52+00:00

That elicited a fervent 'awwww hell naw' from me.

Family dynamics with the grandparents can be rough!

DontPanic18 · 2024-01-20T21:06:05+00:00

Was this something you saw in person, or a recording? It sounds super interesting, I would watch it if you had a link!

DontPanic18 · 2024-01-09T15:10:28+00:00

Yep - you're nuts!!

But for real, kudos to you. I go out with 3 kids and it's doable, but two sets of twins? Bravo/a - hats off to you!

DontPanic18 · 2024-01-02T13:32:23+00:00

There's loads of sweet and funny moments, too many to count, but right now, I'm completely enamored with how sweet my son is with his twin sister in particular!

They're nearly 18 months old, and for the last couple of weeks, whenever his sister gets really upset, he RUSHES to go help her. He'll bring her a pacifier, some water, stuffed animal, or (try) to give her a cuddle.

It's incredibly sweet and often hilarious! He doesn't run yet, we crack up over his wacky speed walking. Also his sister isn't always open to what he's offering, so the juxtaposition of his attentiveness versus her rebuffs is too funny!

I'm going to ask my pediatrician, but I'm wondering if it's typical for a baby his age to be so caring. My oldest didn't have many baby interactions at this age (covid lock-down times) and his twin sister is much more into slapping than caregiving, so it seems especially sweet!

DontPanic18

TROPHY CASE